(Estimated) Personal Confidence Levels to Me Speaking to people
Context: Autistic Chilean girl who speaks both in Spanish (Native) and English (Intermediate). I also have a speech impediment, difficulties to pronounce the hard R and RR words
Me talking alone in English: 99.9%
Me talking alone in Spanish: 90.0% (Confidence breaker: If there are people nearby)
Me talking to friends in Spanish: 95.5% (Confidence Breaker: Forgetting the Spanish word of something when I am more familiar with the English word)
Me talking to friends in English: Possibly 95.0%. I Haven't tried. (Confidence breaker: Not knowing a word or using the wrong word for something. And possibly the fear of using a word that can be a slur somewhere. It happened to me once on a Discord server)
Me talking to strangers in English: Possibly 80.5%? Haven't tried, neither. (Confidence Breaker: Same as the previous point)
Me talking to strangers in Spanish: 75.4% (Confidence breaker: Same point mentioned before. + Not managing to pronounce well my words. Especially words with R and RR words due to my speech impediment)
Me talking to my big brother and dad: 68.5% (Confidence Breaker: Previous points mentioned. + The fear that receiving a harsh or bad comment. Or when they pressured me to speak fluently what I want to say)
Me talking to mom (good or neutral mood). Only Spanish: 59.0% (Confidence Breaker: Previous points mentioned. + Extra pressure since mom's more impatient that the rest of my family)
Me taking to mom (angry mood) Only Spanish: -1000000000.0% + Fear and anxiety that makes my speech WORSE + The feel of need to cry and hate myself
