“I’m just saying, Steph. Something about this year feels different.”
“Different how? And how can you even tell? It’s only February.” Stephanie rolled over onto her back; her apartment floor was probably the warmest spot in the whole place.
“I dunno. I just have a gut feeling that this year will not be like the others.”
“Is that a good thing?”
“I’ll let you know in December.” She chuckled. She had no idea what he was talking about anymore.
“Alright, dude. Whatever you say.”
Scratching her stomach, Stephanie got up, phone still pressed up to her ear.
“Anyway. Check the calendar lately?”
“Ugh,” she groaned. “Don’t remind me. Today was the one day I actually wished I had work.”
“What, no date?”
“Nope.”
“I’m not surprised,” Hyunsu teased; she scoffed.
“Oh yeah? And what about you, huh? You got a date?”
“Talking to her right now actually.” She laughed along with him, but she couldn’t help but notice the tightness in her chest. It wasn't strange for him to talk that way, but she always wondered how serious he was being every time he did.
“You couldn’t impress any girls close by, so you had to settle for the one chick you knew on the other side of the world?”
“Foreign chicks have always been a favourite of mine.”
“Eww. Perv.”
"What're we complaining about anyway? We hate Valentine's Day, remember?"
"True. It's just a Hallmark holiday, right?"
"Right."
"Besides. The day's almost over here."
Stephanie chewed on her bottom lip. For years, she and Hyunsu had made it their mission to reject the very idea of Valentine's Day. For years, the fourteenth had been a day of turning down dates, saying no to fancy cards and bouquets of flowers (not chocolates -- they always kept the chocolates, of course!). It hadn't been her idea; Hyunsu had been the one to open her eyes to the unnecessary hype of Valentine's Day. But she had no problem with it, because she could see his point: romance should not be limited to one day every year. Still, deep down, Stephanie hoped that one year -- just one year -- he might change his mind.
"But I wouldn't really mind it. Celebrating Valentine's Day, I mean," she blurted out. Immediately her eyes widened; she realised that what was supposed to stay a thought, was suddenly spoken out loud.
"Really?"
"Well... yeah. I guess." Her whole body was in panic mode. Stephanie sat down on the edge of her bed, scratching her head. "I mean, like, just to experience it all. All the... romance... and stuff..." There was very little confidence in her voice, and she was sure Hyunsu could hear it.
And then unexpectedly the sound of his laughter rang in her ear, and her stomach fluttered with anxiety.
"Oh God. We're even more alike than I thought we were," he said. "Me too."
"Huh? "Me too" what?"
"As in, "me too" I'd like to romance someone. Just to see what it feels like. I mean, you know I'm not the most mushy guy out there, but I'd like to think I can still get a few butterflies stirring. It's a shame you're not here, Steph. I could've taken you out on a date."
"Uh huh."
A sudden knocking at her apartment door had Stephanie flinching. Phone still pressed up to her ear, she stood up and opened the door.
"Hello. I'm from Bumblebee's. This is an order for a... uh... Miss Stephanie Lee?" A young delivery boy, no older than nineteen at most, held a bouquet of sunflowers, head tilted to the side just a little as he observed her stunned expression.
"Sunflowers, right?" She took the flowers from the delivery boy without much control of her arms, bowing politely as he walked away with a smile. Stephanie slowly shut the door with her heel, lips starting to tremble ever-so-slightly.
"You..."
"An ocean or two isn't gonna stop me, you know." She leaned back against the door, cradling the flowers in the crook of her arm as she pressed her hand up to her lips, eyes shut tightly. "I was gonna do a shit-ton more, but there were so many places that didn't do delivery. Korea needs to get their shit together and step up their game, I swear." Stephanie sniffed and cleared her throat, willing away the tears that threatened to spill from the corners of her eyes. "Hey. You okay?"
"Yeah. Yeah, I'm good. Thanks for this."
"Anything for my fave. Happy Valentine's Day, Bonnie."
On sleepless nights, Stephanie ends up making things worse, but she always tries to assure herself that what she's doing is not something she'll regret later.
✉ CLYDE [ 05.09.14 - 02:17AM ] I found the funniest thing yesterday
✉ CLYDE [ 05.09.14 - 02:18AM ] Wait
✉ CLYDE [ 05.09.14 - 02:18AM ] What time is it over there???
✉ CLYDE [ 05.09.14 - 02:19AM ] Oh shit my bad
She always does though.
Stephanie knows that the last thing she needs to be doing is re-reading old text messages, but that thought alone is never enough to stop her from doing it. It must be time for snow in New York soon. Her blankets will always end up tangled around her legs when she wakes up, whether she's slept for two hours or twelve.
✉ CLYDE [ 01.10.14 - 12:21PM ] Your boy Tony was on the news today
✉ CLYDE [ 01.10.14 - 12:22PM ] Your bank's got a scholarship for NYU
✉ CLYDE [ 01.10.14 - 12:22PM ] The Stephanie Lee Scholarship
✉ CLYDE [ 01.10.14 - 12:22PM ] For the disadvantaged youth
✉ CLYDE [ 01.10.14 - 12:23PM ] How cute
✉ CLYDE [ 01.10.14 - 12:23PM ] I should apply for it
It's kinda crazy, but he always seems to know exactly when she needs to hear from him. And, without fail, that always adds to her sadness.
✉ CLYDE [ 07.10.14 - 05:37AM ] My Bonnie lies over the ocean
✉ CLYDE [ 07.10.14 - 05:37AM ] My Bonnie lies over the sea
✉ CLYDE [ 07.10.14 - 05:37AM ] My Bonnie lies over the ocean
✉ CLYDE [ 07.10.14 - 05:38AM ] Oh bring back my Bonnie to me
Some mornings, she thinks to herself, "Even the craziest of people don't hug their pillows as much as I do," and then suddenly even the smallest things annoy her.
The sun is way too bright. This stupid pen's running out of ink. This coffee tastes like shit. My shoes are dirty. This one strand of hair, I swear to God...
These mood drops don't come by often -- Stephanie wants more than anything to blame it on PMS, but they never seem to line up with TOM -- but when they do, she feels like she can't function properly for a couple days.
✉ CLYDE [ 10.10.14 - 09:48AM ] I expect $75 in my account by tonight
✉ CLYDE [ 10.10.14 - 09:48AM ] $75 for some orange tulips? Forreal?
✉ CLYDE [ 10.10.14 - 09:49AM ] Well as long as Mama Lee is happy
✉ CLYDE [ 10.10.14 - 04:11PM ] Steph I was kidding
✉ CLYDE [ 10.10.14 - 04:11PM ] You fucking wired me $75
✉ CLYDE [ 10.10.14 - 04:12PM ] I can't believe you
✉ CLYDE [ 10.10.14 - 04:19PM ] -- Image received --
✉ CLYDE [ 10.10.14 - 04:20PM ] My middle finger. With love ♥
Stephanie hates spending whole days in bed, because the feelings of lethargy are always at an all-time high then. If he would just move his ass here, I wouldn't be like this.
✉ OUTGOING MESSAGE: Happy birthday, my sexy piece of shit, Clyde
✉ OUTGOING MESSAGE: Save me some cake
✉ CLYDE [ 27.10.14 - 08:56AM ] Thank you, my beautiful bitch, Bonnie
✉ CLYDE [ 27.10.14 - 08:56AM ] I wish you were here
✉ CLYDE [ 27.10.14 - 08:57AM ] I need my partner in crime in NY
✉ CLYDE [ 27.10.14 - 08:57AM ] I miss you, Steph
✉ CLYDE [ 27.10.14 - 08:57AM ] Okay I need to stop being so mushy ew
✉ CLYDE [ 27.10.14 - 08:58AM ] Call me later?
✉ CLYDE [ 27.10.14 - 08:59AM ] ♥
Stephanie just couldn't bring herself to go to work that day.
