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The Black Parade?

saddest song? hmm, Wind in the Wires by Patrick Wolf always makes me sad

#stillpixilated

stillpixilated replied to your post: “I can’t continue my current stitching project until tomorrow (have to...”:

These are so pretty, Kris!! You should open an Etsy!

Thank you! I’ve thought about that, but I worry about the pressure to make them absolutely perfect.

syksy replied to your post: “I can’t continue my current stitching project until tomorrow (have to...

Pretty! How about positive song lyrics?

Thanks! That’s what I was thinking, I just don’t know which lyrics haha!

#stillpixilated #syksy #personal

I had been all huffy lately because I felt like I was busting my ass for no good reason, but then today I found out some of the people with the company actually like me and they wanted me to be their assistant today. Me, not just any student, me, even if they couldn't remember my name, they went out of their way to tell me multiple times, that they wanted me. Even though I am exhausted and still kind of fed up with the whole thing, it is so nice to know that all my hard work isn’t for nothing. Some people see it and they appreciate. This makes me not feel like such a jerk for working my butt off.

#personal #stillpixilated

Don't you love when I get emotional and rant to all of you?

#stillpixilated

Rant time

Ok, so here it goes. I am getting really tired of people telling me how I am feeling and when I am feeling too much of it. Especially since these people, have barely known me for 6 months. You know highlights of my life. Did you take the time months ago to find out why I reacted a certain way? And now, when I tell you about why I am upset and then you tell me I am too emotional and need to get over it? Maybe it isn't fair to hold you to the standard that I hold myself, but I am a libra (even though you make fun of me for "being an astrologist") I try to be fair and I expect other people to be fair. If I see an injustice, that makes me angry. I'm sorry (not sorry) that I am not willing to sacrifice my soul "to play the game". Yes, it upsets me if I can't connect with people, but if one of those "people" picks and chooses who they help not based on merit or skill, I can't respect you. I can't respect you if you hold everyone to an incredibly high standard that you do not meet. I have been this way my whole life. This is my cross to bear. I realize it may not be the best way to look at the world, but it is how I look at the world. I try to be kind and not hurt anyone. I try hard. I get physically sick if I think I have offended someone. Sick. So, yes, I may be sick tonight because I am posting this, but I am so frustrated because I feel like I am surrounded by people that "know me" but they know a caricature/Instagram profile version of me. You say you are my friend, but you still judge me like this? You still tell me I am too emotional? Guess what, I am human, I have emotions. I work through them by talking. Writing and speaking help me wrap my head around myself. Honestly, 85% of the time, If I share my feelings with you, I don't want you to tell me I have to stop caring so much, or I need to get with the times, or I need to just ignore the people that I don't like. Guess what? I am an adult. I know how I deal with junk. None of those are ways that I (ME, MADELINE) deal with my emotions. They never will be. If you are my friend, listen that is all I need. I listen to you, because I like helping people. I give advice, but I don't expect you to follow through. If you *ask*'for my advice, say it is good, ignore it and continue to complain, that is when I back off and just stop. I can't deal with that. I know what I can and can't deal with. I can't deal with not verbalizing my feelings. I can't deal with you taking time from my life to try to help you, not follow through and continue to complain because you wouldn't follow through. Ugh. I have too many problems tonight and you lovely, Tumblr friends are the lucky few I am sharing with since most of the humans I interact with don't seem to want to take the time to actually get to know me. *le sigh*

#stillpixilated