Shitty swords and siblings
Long lost brothers au where dave started making swords as like a joke because what is more ironic than pooring your blood sweat and tears into a fresh out the oven katana (and probably because it was such a huge part of his childhood for better or worse) so after like years of just like fucking with sword designing and forgery he gets reaaally good at making swords. He turns a quick buck by selling the shittiest ones at anime conventions for the lols.
Dirk, a known lover of swords and all the things present in conventions, is a sword critic. This motherfucker has a yelp style sword review blog. He is a top tier repsected otaku, he is the Roman emperor at the top of the collosium just waiting to turn his thumb down so the greasy fedora who dared sell him a faulty, out of period katana can meet the swift embrace of death at the hand of his own shitty merch.
And do they meet, dave sells some swords like usual and then this one vaguely familiar weaboo comes up to him and like, studies his shit. Mkaes dave a little nervous because this dude hasn't said shit but hes been staring intensely at the swords for like 5 straight minutes.
Dirk on the other hand is having a nerdgasm even though an initial sweep declared them regular shitty swords, the ones on the walls are fucking immaculate. Not one flaw, lovingly designed and fully functional. Dirk is like "are you a professional welder? Are those personal display only swords?"
Dave just shrugs "nah this is just stuff I made that's been lying in the reject box for awhile. I make swords as a hobby and I'm running outta non-dangerous places to put em"
Dirk is blown away by that, like hed probably be more chill about riding a dinosaur than this because these are someof the best swords he's ever seen and this dude??? They're just his throw aways??? And so Dirk proceeds to basically fund daves hobby all by himself.
And they probably realize they're like brothers pr something in the procsses and its all kinds of wacky. Secretly the reason dave sells his swords is because karkats moving into his apartment and he can't keep them all over the place anymore cause his bf is gonna chop his foot of walking on the carpet on of these days I swear to god Dave.
