Happiness 101: Never Think of What Others Think of You.
I sure am going to post this because if I don’t, I’d blow this whole country up. (No pun intended.)
Last night, my sister opened up to me and my mother about some stuff she had about friends. I tried my best giving her the advice I can give as a sister and its difficult saying them because it feels like I am saying those things to myself. Hell, I have been in the situation (too many times, ugh) and I hope she trusted the pieces of advice I gave her. I couldn’t afford having another person go through the same situations I went through with roughly 23 years of being a lone wolf.
TBH, I didn’t know what to say to her because hearing her say her piece was like hearing myself in loudspeaker. It feels like my inner self came to life. I couldn’t sleep yesternight because of that. Lord, please, she doesn’t deserve this. I have been lonely enough, why does she have to suffer, too? I don’t understand.
Ako nalang, please. Ako nalang.
The best advice I thought I gave her was that of the title. To never think of what others has to say about you. To never care. To never let them take control of your life. And then reality stroke back--it’s for you, too, dear.
I have been trying, Reality, okay? I have been trying and I’m not gonna stop trying.
But you know what? I’m still hoping. For better people. For better friends. For better situations. I don’t know if my recent status will help (trust me, I hope it does), but srsly I don’t know.
Actually, my recent status just revealed to me who the real ones are. It hurts to have seen my “HOME” congratulate my “batchmates” forgetting I was even a part of that “HOME” before they could even get there. It sucks. They don’t really know me, sure. But I doubt they know my name. The worst part is, someone reminded them of me--NO ONE ACTUALLY CARED. So much hate for these people (except for those who cared of course).
Thinking of what I could do with my newly acquired achievement... Oh! I could now officially forget these people. There mustn’t be any room for them now. Bye bye, babies. Hope you guys have a good life. And good words. Because I don’t have any for you anymore. (Please know that the few old friends I made from this “HOME” is exempted from any of this hatred).
So maybe one day, I’ll be happy. Well, hope so.
-R.