Oct 4, 2018
“It’s been 100 years since those accursed Inklings stole victory from us in the Great Turf War. We’ve been left with very little power since then, and it’s been draining ever still. Meanwhile, THEY’VE been living it up like the slimy little hipsters they are. Well, I’ve had enough. I’ve spent the last 100 years thinking of how I’ll get my revenge, and now I’m finally ready to exact it. And you, the greatest of my soldiers, shall be my emissary. Use the gift that I have given you to take back what’s mine. What’s OURS. You’ll start with the Great Zapfish, which is wrapped around that disgusting tower of theirs. Now go! Subject 0440!”
“Yes, my lord...”