#swap:start

[ripley-lynn-blog]

Why is it that my waiter/waitress always tries to talk to me as soon as I start eating a mouthful of food? 

It’s like they purposefully watch my table and hold out for the moment I start chewing and come and ask me how everything is. If the man I spit on tonight is reading this, I’m really sorry that you’ve got pasta stains on you. The meatballs were amazing and I appreciate that you suggested them.

[qfxbray-blog]

If one more person asks if I’m wearing a leather jacket to look edgy, I swear I’m gonna ask one of my friends to punch them out. Donny likes violence, it won’t be my fault. Can’t a guy find himself without people asking so many damn questions?

[michelle-chang]

Mass Text

Michelle: quick whats a reasonable excuse for having bruises all over your legs

[ripley-lynn-blog]

It’s official -- my phone is haunted. If I leave my Skype app open and set it down on the table, it will just randomly call people while I’m not even touching it. These ghosts must be pretty lonely because all they ever wanna do is talk on Skype.

Who knows what it’ll be next -- they’ll start buying haunted items on Amazon or using my Chipotle app. I’m not ready for this next-level roommate committment. Should I get my phone exercised? Send advice, please and thanks.

[jessehitchens-blog]

After a last double-check of her hair and makeup in the mirror, Kate swung her locker shut and nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw someone standing immediately next to her. The books in her arms all tumbled to the floor and she let out a long, world-weary sigh. “You scared the hell out of me. Jacob Ben Israel’s been lurking around the halls trying to get an interview with me about how I apparently spent the summer taking care of my dad after his baboon-heart transplant.” She rolled her eyes and bent to start gathering up the fallen textbooks. “One more year. One more year, and then I’m never setting foot back in this godforsaken high school again.”