#t: bryce

[emery-shaw]

Texts | | Bryce + Emery

Emery: even composing this message feels pretty fucking weird but Avery's literally one of the best people in my life so I can handle a little awkwardness

Emery: I don't know what your intentions are with my cousin but if you aren't interested in being with her romantically, can you please just let her go?

[rydellysterling]

TEXT: RYDEL ⇆ BRYCE

Rydel: 45 bucks to do my math homework plz

Rydel: And a starbucks drink of your choosing.

[chlo-miller]

Text | Bryce & Chloe

Bryce: Book my flight and I’ll reimburse you. I miss you too, beautiful. How’s your week? And why are we going to Africa?

Chloe: No, no, no. It's my treat. But now I'm really excited!

Chloe: Well it's only Monday but there are no complaints for a two day work week.How about you? Did I just throw everything off for you? Because I'm turning twenty-five and I'm trying to avoid having a quarter life crisis by doing something on my bucket list.

[amberjade-rhodes]

WHEN: 20 October 2021 TYPE: Text thread NB: What starts as a lighthearted conversation about a possible date ends with the two realising that they are on very different pages. Although the two have been broken up for months now, the conversation ends up feeling a lot like a goodbye. @brycecortez

Bryce:

hey

i know this is random, but i just went to that book cafe that sky works at and it reminded me of the time i texted lola desperately asking for help because i wasn’t sure what kind of books you like, and i’m pretty much illiterate 😂

anyways, it didn’t feel right going without you. wanna have a bookstore date? you might be able to help me pick out something decent, i’m trying to get into reading more

my treat :)

AJ:

hey 🙂 okay yes that’s a little random but honestly just reminds me about how sweet I found that whole gesture

holy shit yes

I’ve always thought that a bookstore date is literally one of the cutest and most romantic ideas, you have no idea how excited I am!!

Bryce:

i’m excited too 😚

and maybe after we can either go back to your place or mine and maybe watch a movie or two

AJ:

that honestly sounds like the perfect day

if you were trying to make me swoon, you’ve succeeded

let’s go back to yours

Bryce:

i’m always trying to make you swoon

if you’re not swooning i’ve failed

AJ:

my feelings for you give you a pretty big advantage

Bryce:

especially because you love me 🥺

AJ:

I do, I never stopped

Bryce:

i know

i don’t know why, but i know

AJ:

I’m glad that you know, it breaks my heart to even think about you doubting that

Bryce:

and i hope you never doubt that i feel the same

AJ:

… there have been some doubts but I think that’s more reflective of my issues than anything you’ve done

Bryce:

doubts? what doubts?

AJ:

that I’m not enough anymore but that seems to be fading the more time that we spend together. I…. I’ve started therapy too so I’ve started talking it through in that space

Bryce:

are you free right now? i feel like i need to tell you this in person

AJ:

yeah I’ve just finished my shift at fat boys and I’m waiting for the bus home

Bryce:

i’ll go pick you up because i /need/ you to know that you’re enough

you’ve always been enough

AJ:

if that’s the only reason why you want to hang out, you seriously don’t need to worry like I said, this is more to do with /my/ issues than anything you’ve said or done

Bryce:

but even then, something i’ve said or done has incorporated into this feeling

AJ:

I guess I always thought that if we ended up in the same place at the same time, we’d somehow be able to pick up where we left off

it always felt like a breakup from sheer necessity because of our circumstances at the time, not because we felt out of love

so I guess it’s just taken me a little time to process the fact that you’re back but we aren’t back together, that’s all

Bryce:

it was a breakup from sheer necessity. i never fell out of love with you

but at the same time, it was a breakup that really fucked me up

AJ:

it really fucked me up too

I never thought that we’d have an expiration date and it fucking killed me

and I couldn’t even be mad or hate you over the fact that I ended up with a broken heart because I knew why it had to happen so I just spent months missing you, crying over you, and fucking sick to my stomach over the thought that you could literally die any minute

… is that why you don’t want to try this again? you don’t want to risk getting hurt if it doesn’t work out?

Bryce:

i know. trust me, i out of everyone know why it had to be done — why we had to break up. it’s not fair of me to ask you to wait forever

yes...that’s exactly why. and it’s not that i don’t want to try again, i do, but i just can’t bring myself to rush back into the one thing that can, and has, destroyed me

AJ:

as much as I hate to read that… I do understand where you’re coming from, better than most other people would.

I know that if we were ever together again, I’d be wanting it to last forever but there’s nothing that I can say or do to make you come to that same realisation. it’s a decision that you have to make for yourself

and as much as I hate to say this, I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to go on that bookshop date or even hang out all that much. I’m clearly in a very different place from you, a place where there is absolutely no doubt that I want to try things again. spending time with you when I know that we aren’t on the same page… it’s killing me. I can’t be just friends with you, I can’t keep doing things halfway like we have been since you got back. every single time I’m around you, all I want is to touch you, hold you, kiss you, be with you… I’m really sorry, Bryce, but I can’t give you what you need from me right now. I love you too much.

Bryce:

so, that’s it then?

AJ:

I guess so. I don’t know how to be just friends with you, Bryce. I don’t know how to do things halfway, not when I’m still in love with you. I’m really sorry, I wish I could be the person that you needed.

Bryce:

that’s fair. at the end of the day you gotta do what you think is right for you.

i’ll always be here for you no matter what, remember that please

AJ:

[read]

[amberjade-rhodes]

WHEN: 9 October, 2021 TYPE: Text thread NB: AJ texts Bryce to thank him for spending her birthday with her, which leads to an uncomfortable conversation about the state of their relationship. @brycecortez

AJ:

thank you for celebrating my birthday with me. having you back on campus is the best gift of all x

Bryce:

thank you for choosing me to spend your birthday with

AJ:

…..

.

…..

There’s no one else that I’d rather spend my birthday with

Bryce:

[typing]

well i’m really glad that you had a nice birthday. you seem to be happy

AJ:

happier since you’ve been back, although this level of formality is a little weird for us…

Bryce:

it’s very weird for us lol i’m not sure if i like it

AJ:

I don’t like it either but I feel like I’ve brought it on myself because of everything I had to tell you

Bryce:

thank you for being honest with me

at the end of the day, i just want you to be happy. you gotta do what’s best for you aj

AJ;

I feel like we skimmed over this because there were so many other things to discuss but I ended things as soon as I realised that you were back

before even knowing if you still loved me or wanted to be with me

it was over the second that I saw you again

Bryce:

why? he seems to be good for you

you need someone like that in your life. you deserve it, quite frankly

AJ:

he’s not you. it only worked when I had completely given up hope that I’d ever see you again

I can understand why you probably can’t believe that, though. I’m sorry for hurting you, Bryce. I’ll give you as much time and space as you need… I understand that I’m probably the last person you want to be around right now

Bryce:

you're not the last person that i want to be around right now

if anything, you were the one person i wanted at my side when shit hit the fan

AJ:

I’m terrified of the answer to this question but I feel like I /have/ to ask

… is there any hope for us?

Bryce:

i don't know...is there?

i want to leave the ball in your court since i'm the one who left and then came back

AJ:

from my end? yes. there’s no doubt in my mind that I want to be with you

I just don’t know if that’s what you want

Bryce:

of course i want to be with you

but i think we both have a lot of shit we have to work through individually

AJ:

yeah I get that

It’s not what I want to hear because it sounds a lot like we’re never going to happen but I do get it

Bryce:

it's just that

you've been through a lot, and you're currently going through a lot. i don't want to be an added problem

but i do still love you, that's never changed

AJ:

you were never a problem, Bryce. if anything, you were salvation

I understand though

I’ll be here if you ever change your mind

Bryce:

i love you, and i missed you.

AJ:

I love you and I missed you. still miss you, actually

I know you’re back but you also kind of aren’t back, at least not with me. not like it was before.

Bryce:

i’m right here, aj

AJ:

except you aren’t mine anymore

which is something that I’ll have to get used to

Bryce:

i’ve always been yours

AJ:

you… you can’t say things like that when we’re not together, it’s not fair.

I’m head over heels in love with you, Bryce

and I’m trying to be okay with the fact that we’re not together but then you say things like that and…. I’m suddenly filled with hope all over again, only for it to inevitably be crushed

Bryce:

[typing for several minutes]

you're right

i'll stop. i'm sorry

AJ:

I feel like you’re missing my point

I’m in love with you, Bryce. I’ve been in love with you for a long time. I’m never going to stop being in love with you.

I know that I’ve made mistakes. I know that I’m fucked up and flawed and not a smart choice in the relationship department. Trust me, I know that you can do way better

This is me fighting for you, Bryce. This is making it absolutely clear that I want to be with you. I don’t want to be with anyone other than you.

I just… if you don’t want me back, if you don’t want a relationship with me, I need you to tell me. every time that you tell me that you love me or that you miss me, I’m filled with hope that maybe there is a chance for us and then it’s crushed all over again when it doesn’t lead to anything

so that’s why I’m asking you to stop saying those things if there isn’t hope for us because it’s breaking my heart every single time. I… I can’t keep putting myself out there, I can’t keep being vulnerable, I can’t keep desperately hoping for something that might never come.

Bryce:

i don’t know what to say. if i tell you that i love you i’m in the wrong, but if i don’t say anything...i’m still somehow in the wrong.

i told you my feelings for you didn’t change, isn’t that enough?

AJ:

I guess I just don’t understand why we aren’t together if your feelings haven’t changed

if your feelings haven’t changed, what’s different this time around?

all I can think is that I’m officially damaged goods in your eyes, that you’ve finally realised that my negatives outweigh my positives and that you deserve better

Bryce:

you’re not damaged goods. you’ve never been damaged goods

but we’ve both been through a lot the last few months. what if it’s not the same as it was before?

AJ:

I don’t know what else to say, Bryce. you know how I feel and what I want. if you ever decide that I’m worth another shot and that this is something you want to pursue… well, you know where to find me

Bryce:

i’m sorry. i feel like i’m hurting you and that’s the last thing that i want to do. if the question is whether or not i’m still in love with you, i am. and i want to be with you, i really do.

we’re just both going through a lot right now. i don’t want to be an added stressor

AJ:

like I said, you’re not an added stressor. god, seeing you on campus again…. It’s like i could finally breathe again. That’s the opposite of a stressor

you know where I stand now so if you ever want to talk about us… you know where to find me

Bryce:

this isn’t me not wanting a relationship with you. you’re the only one i want a relationship with. i just want you to be okay

okay...i love you, never forget that

AJ:

[read]

[xmarilynex]

Marilyne didn’t much like Soteria. Everything here felt too CLEAN and as soon as she entered the hairs on the back of her neck always stood to attention as the anxiety of constant eyes on her washed over. Naturally, no-one who knew her from Salus would ever guess that Marilyne felt this way. It would come as quite the shock to find out that anyone out there ever thought she were capable of feeling UNEASY.  Hell, the general assumption was she wasn’t capable of feeling anything at all. The proposition wouldn’t be too far off the truth, but it is more a case of Marilyne feeling everything with such fired INTENSITY that, actually, she feels nothing at all. Everything and nothing. A constant, strange limbo of a state of mind. Right now though, she had come to maintain ties with the people in the city. Some people would call them her friends. 

She sat at the bar of the coffee shop, her eyes wandering, lips curled up into a tight smile all the while. Even as she intensely listened to the man at the counter be aggressively RUDE to Bryce. As he stepped a line, Mar simply chuckled to herself as her eyes locked into his. He must have known who she really was, because he soon changed his tune, grabbed his coffee, and practically ran. Marilyne shook her head, smile unwaivering, as she directed her gaze to the owner. “You really shouldn’t put up with that, you know.” There was a calmness in her voice that stung. “Taking in all of that-- disrespect... It’s dangerous. For your ENERGIES.” Mar crossed one leg over the other as what appeared to be delicate hands cupped the mug in front of her. “You lose your balance with taking in all that aggression and nastiness from these damn men and you’ll end up snapping one day... You are far too kind and special of a soul to go down that road, darling.”.

closed starter w/ @thebrycepowell​

[amberjade-rhodes]

Texts | | AJ + Bryce

AJ: your favorite thing about me is that the sex is pretty great?

AJ: I thought that I would have at LEAST reached excellent status by now

AJ: maybe you need some reminders about how amazing I am...

AJ: [IMAGE]

AJ: [IMAGE]

AJ: [IMAGE]

[jeremy-tyler]

text | bryce + jeremy

Jeremy: Hey man, everything alright? Jeremy: Listen up, I sort of need you to come to a dinner this weekend. Jeremy: At my shit parents, for my dearest dead sister.