#tailahistrying

[ohhhstfu]

Trying to do self work can be painful

Trying to deal with my emotions is tough. Accepting everything for what it is is tough. I feel physical pain and distress trying to sort through why I’m feeling what I’m feeling. I feel like I can’t say these things to anyone. It hurts. And the tears are painful and silencing my cries makes my throat hurt and trying to be okay is tiring. I just wanna be okay.

[ohhhstfu]

Pulling myself together and I wrote this to myself

Nothing worth it is ever easy. Stop making excuses and make ways. Create routes and get there. Your mind is strong enough. You're smart enough Intelligent enough Beautiful enough Wise enough You are the universe in human form Your abilities are limitless You are not to be taken lightly You are a force to be reckoned with You are a your greatest weapon You are the key to peace You are the key to love You are love You are light You are evolving in this very moment You are beautiful because you are so human You are so human and that is so beautiful

[ohhhstfu]

I got a vision and I'm gonna reach it

It don't involve silly boys that break my heart and can't see my worth It's all about me and for me and just because if I reach my goals it'll make ME happy *sigh* I gotta see my dreams

[ohhhstfu]

Ain't got no body to talk to

And it's quite refreshing I'm getting the hang of this single thang

[ohhhstfu]

Letting go gracefully

I'm letting go but God please promise me you'll help me work this shit out! Putting on my big girl panties and trying not to be bitter but please promise me you've got me

[ohhhstfu]

Just thinking

I wouldn't wish depression on anybody But I wish he could feel what I was going through, to make me act so irrationally If he could feel how I felt, he would maybe understand why I would do the things I did. Maybe he would have treated me differently and things would be differently

[ohhhstfu]

I ain't never had a problem with saying fuck a nigga quick

I've been hurt. My ego is fragile, Still trynna get that shit back strong So any sign that a mf give That he ain't fcking with me How I'm fcking with him I dip and cut all ties It may not be the best way But it'll do for now

[ohhhstfu]

Life feeling blah.

Trying not to feel down. I've been working so hard lately. I'm literally working 3 jobs to have enough money to live and do the things I need to do to get to where I want to be. And somethings are harder than others to do. The success of one thing effects another and if i don't succeed at one thing it can be a domino effect. I'm under so much pressure and it's starting to feel like I'll never get a break. While I know I'm working towards something greater, the routine I've set up for myself to be able to reach my goals has me feeling like my life is mediocre. I have no life outside of school and work and While I know it's temporary I'm just starting to get real bored, real fast. Trying to stay motivated, positive, and grateful. This shit is just so hard man.