I've never had a problem with my sexuality. I never labeled myself as gay, bisexual, pan-sexual, etc. Never. I always thought that love is love and I'll love whoever the hell I want. To say that I've had some problems with relationships would be an understatement. I have only dated one other girl, that didn't end up so well. As in I walked in on her cheating on me with her best friend. After that I stayed away from dating, scared to get hurt again. Past boyfriend's didn't end up well either, I would get dumped or cheated on. So let's just say love and trust didn't come easily to me. I put walls around my heart, just to protect myself from getting hurt again. It worked for awhile...until I met Tara. She broke those walls down before I could even see it coming. I tried to stay away, to make it so I didn't fall for her. It didn't work. Her sweet smile, adorable laugh, really everything about her drew me to her. What I didn't know was that Tara was falling for me too. I thought she just saw me as a friend, nothing more. That was true...for the first half of our friend ship. It felt like one touch from her made all my problems fade away, even if it were just as friends. So I did not see it coming when she kissed me.
"Taraaa," I whined trying to push her hands away from my face. "No, I'm almost done." She giggled still applying the lipstick to my lips. I couldn't help it, my eyes trailed over her face. Her brown eyes lighter than usual from the makeup lights around her mirror, the blonde streaks in her hair falling from her messy bun, her white teeth pressing into her full bottom lip, her eyebrows furrowed in concentration. I swear I fell in love with her more right on the spot. Tara's eyes were glued on my lips, the applicator still being dragged along my bottom lip. After a moment of this, she seemed like she snapped out of a trance. Tara's eyes snapped up to meet mine and I froze. Her eyes pierced into mine, the two of us sitting in silence, staring at each other. My eyes flicked to her lips then to her eyes, suddenly a loud knock on her door sounded, making both us of jump. "Uh- yeah, come in" Tara stammered turning in her seat to face the door. Tara's dad popped his head in, smiley at the both of us, "Hey Tara, me and your mom are leaving now. We'll back later. Bye girls." "Bye' You both replied then the door shut, yet again leaving the two of you alone. I cleared my throat and stood up from her makeup chair, "What uh what do you want to eat? I'll post mate," I said grabbing my phone off of her pink comforter. Tara also stood up from her own chair, re-doing her bun. "Umm, what about sushi?" I nodded my head, "Yeah, I could eat some sushi." We both agreed on a place and ordered the food. Once the food arrived we sat on her bed eating and watching 'Friends'. "You know, I would kill to meet Matthew Perry," she sighed out placing her drink back on the floor. I nodded my head, agreeing with her, "Yeah, I have a feeling that me and him would be good friends," I said before taking a sip of my drink. Tara hit pause then crossed her legs facing me, her eyebrows furrowing, and a smile on her full pink lips. I held up my finger and turned to face her as well, "Um cause we both make cringey jokes." I said like it was obvious smiling back at her. She shook her head, moving closer to me so our legs were touching. "I think your jokes are a lot funnier than his," Tara said leaning over her legs a little, I followed her, leaning closer, "Is that so?" I asked raising an eyebrow at her. Tara nodded her, her eyes flicking down to my lips as my tongue slid out of my mouth and swiped over my bottom lip. Before I knew what was happening, her lips were on mine. I was stunned for second, but I quickly melted into the kiss, my arms wrapping around her waist and pulling her into my lap. Her own arms wrapped around my neck, pulling her closer to me, her fingers tangling in my hair. I tightened my hold on her as her arms also tightened around my neck, pressing her lips and tongue harsher against my own. Reluctantly, we pulled back for air. I tried to open my eyes but it felt like they were glued shut. After a second my eyes fluttered open and were automatically met with Tara's brown eyes. I couldn't stop the smile that spread across my face, Tara's lips pulled up in a wide smile as well. "wow, i- " my voice came out small and hoarse. I cleared my throat and tried to talk again, "what was that?" I asked, my voice still hoarse but a little louder this time. Tara shrugged her shoulders but the smile stayed on her face, "I'm not sure, I just knew that I wanted to kiss you," she whispered back, her voice just as small. "Tara, I don't want to ruin anything but do you want to g-" she cut me off by pressing her soft lips to mine again. Tara pulled away first and rested her forehead on mine, "I would love to go out with you." she replied, a big grin spreading across my face.
Tara loved to share kisses in the dark or in the middle of conversations with friends. That is exactly what had happened tonight. I sat on the couch in Sam's apartment, conversating with Katrina and Devyn when I small hand gripped my jaw and moved my face toward them. I didn't even get to see who it was before a pair of soft, warm lips were laid on mine. The familiar lips were gentle and slow against my own. I melted into the kiss and moved one of my hands to rest on Tara's neck while the other cupped her cheek, pulling her mouth closer to mine. Tara's hands wound in my hair, pulling my lips harder to hers. Our lips and tongues danced with each other, like they remembered what to do with each other. As our tongues swirled together, our friends all shared a look with each other. They all knew about us being together and they couldn't be happier but they didn't expect for the intense kiss that we shared. Tara pulled away slowly, the skin of our lips sticking together. Before she could completely pull away, I smashed our lips together again in another fierce, short kiss. The force of it made Tara lean back but my arms came around her waist to hold her. I pulled away completely and smiled at Tara. She returned my smile, "I love you," she whispered, I smiled back at her, "I love you too." Tara sat up and walked to the kitchen, I turned back to Devyn and Katrina, rubbing my thumb an my bottom lip. "Is it that intense all the time?" Kat asked a small smile on her and Dev's face. I smiled shyly, my cheeks heated up as I nodded, "Every single time."
