#tfc text

[stick-ball]

Bae be like 'i know a spot' then gets kidnapped by the baltimore mafia

[victor-v]

i just found out about this interview and i'm dying

[neil--im-fine--josten]

do yall ever think about all the side eyes the foxes get as they go around campus?

deadass imagine hearing all about the ~troubled~ exy jocks

and u come back from winter vaca and one of the new recruits is head to toes covered in bruises and bandaids

u bet all those non-athlete students are just like

whenever one of the foxes walks past

[winterblues]

Nicky: Are you a big spoon or a little spoon?

Andrew: I'm a knife.

Neil: *yells from across the room* He’s a little spoon!

[myblessedeyes]

In the second installment of my touch-starved chronicles, I present to you more things that my ass can’t stop thinking about at 2 in the morning and so will project them onto my two stickball playing softbois, because they deserve this kind of softness and I hope they find comfort in these actions as I do, and hopefully so do you:

Pimple popping:

You know our homeboi Neil ain’t about that “scan every inch of your face for imperfections in front of the bathroom mirror” kind of person. so, i give you: Andrew, pimple popping extraordinaire, perched on Neil’s lap, hand on chin as he inspects his not boyfriend’s face because Nicky had gone to him, two vodka bottles in hand, pleading for him to do something about that monstrosity living in the middle of Neil’s forehead. it’s ruining everything, Andrew.

he would’ve left him be, but it’s been 2 weeks since the last time he’s gotten a chance to stare at the stupid beauty that is Neil’s face and he needs his fill of hearing Neil whine about stupid Nicky, who does he think he is. he should do something about his bullshit footwork as a backliner…

‘Drew you got a blackhead right here,” “It’s a beauty mark, stupid ass,” “I’m friends with Allison Reynolds, Andrew. I think I know the difference between a blackhead and a beauty mark.” (Also, Neil spends every morning memorizing every inch of Andrew’s face again and again like he did the road maps he couldn’t carry around with him but that his mom would tell him to memorize when they had to split up to lose someone that was tailing them and had agreed to meet up in this specific obscure town 10 miles from where they were and he knew for a fact, that that little dot was not there yesterday morning)

Neil’s immersed in a book in Spanish, telling the tale about this Aztecan warrior escaping from the Spanish raids and looking for his family in the chaos that’s full of action that rung truer than most books (to his personal calculations) that his professor had recommended; his ass is perched on Andrew’s lap, his legs spread wide on either side of Andrew’s waist as Andrew’s broad hand presses to the back of his thigh, the other hand bringing the other leg to his side, before he’s pushing the first leg down onto his torso, helping him stretch out that one muscle he might’ve pulled during practice and that might’ve had him limping all over campus uncomfortably the entire day

Andrew sitting in the bath in his home in Columbia, water boiling hot and a soft pink color from the bathbomb Neil had put in for him, with Neil’s legs on either side of his torso as Neil, clothed and seated on the moist edge of the bath, worked the tense muscles of Andrew’s neck and shoulders with hard strokes and this lavender oil Dan had recommended to him from her collection of essential oils that has Andrew literally moaning in ecstasy while he hosts a war inside his mind telling him to shut the fuck up, you’re embarrassing yourself but then Neil gives a hard stroke down his back and he allows himself to worry about the mental fatigue of worrying over how he was voicing his pleasure for another time

Neil’s arms wrapped around Andrew’s waist, chin pressed to his solar plexus as he sat atop their car’s hood, Neil’s voice softly pointing out every constellation and the story that comes with them into his chin, which Neil occasionally kisses softly, at times drawing the seated man to peer down at him and obliges himself a kiss

Meeting up with Neil after his morning class because they were going to leave campus to go to Columbia for the long weekend and finding him in the student lounge in a bulky hoodie with his number decorating the back, and bringing attention to the broad expanse of his shoulders and the cinched waist that made up Neil’s torso, with his hoodie drawn as he leaned over his legs because the stupid ass had gone hard in their midnight practice and had immediately committed to an all-nighter to finish all the work he had to turn in on Friday to turn it in today and so that he didn’t have to be bothered during their short vacation. Stepping up to him with a grunt and a teasing comment for his sluggishness which Neil chuckles at exasperatedly before reaching forward and hooking a finger to one of his jean’s belt loops to tug him forward and into the space between his legs to smother his face into his belly button which Andrew conceded to with a roll of the eyes and a hand raking into the back of his head.

kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss:

Neil stretched out on top of Andrew’s body, shimmying higher up with Andrew’s fingers slipped under the band of his leggings and underwear to press against the skin of the small of his back as Neil pressed a kiss to his lips: a soft one, a tender one , and then a loving one before placing one of each on his cheekbone, on his nose, between his eyebrows, on his chin, right below his eye then back to his lips where he kissed and kissed and kissed and Andrew let him and felt nothing but contentment through it.

 Andrew wears a sleeveless shirt with his signature armbands in the middle of the summer and Neil can only stare at the small muscle there as it flexes. Neil slips a hand onto his bicep before he swoops down and plants a soft kiss to the muscle there, watching in fascination as it tenses under his ministrations.

Andrew pressing a kiss to Neil’s jaw, finally indulging himself after having to see his stupid not-boyfriend clench his jaw as ESPN spent the day of Riko’s death anniversary praising him for being an “angel for strikers” then the underside before following the line of his jaw with kisses, kissing higher and higher until he was about to reach his chin, skipping it to switch to the other side of his jaw to continue his trek up to his chin where he scraped his teeth on it and laving it with a swipe of his tongue 

Neil getting into the habit of kissing the back of Andrew’s neck after checking if he slept well while Andrew sits on the edge of the bed and rubs the heels of his hands to his eyes before getting up

 Andrew turning his face into the hand Neil had used to carefully cradle his jaw with to kiss it

 Reaching up and kissing Neil on the cheek after they’ve been trading snarky comments with each other to fluster him

Burrowing into Neil as they wait with the rest of the team for Best Buy to open up on Black Friday because the new PlayStation was coming out and they need it, Neil. We have to be cool, like every body else, Neil. So we have to get a new PlayStation like everyone else, Neil. and telling Andrew of how him and his mom would take advantage of events like this and pick people’s pockets while they were in line or would steal certain objects that they could easily hide in their bulky jackets to sell them and get cash from there as Andrew secretly prompted him to continue by pressing lazy kisses across his collarbones.

 Neil pressing kisses to the inside of the thigh he’s leaning his head against and abandoning his homework to just turn around and nuzzle into it effectively distracting Andrew from his own book

because freaking fight me if you think that Andrew doesn’t also have the thighs of steel but that soft, fat skin on the inside of his thighs from eating too many damn sweets

Neil hopping onto the bathroom counter as Andrew is in the middle of shaving, smiling at him tentatively with a hand extended which Andrew stares at him for, rolls his eyes at before handing over his razor. With a tug at one of his belt loops, Neil has him between his legs and after swishing the blade in the water, as he’s seen Andrew do a million times before, he leans forward, presses Andrew’s chin back with a thumb and goes to finish clearing under his jaw before he carefully followed the curve of his jaw onto his cheeks. Every time he clears a spot, Neil makes a point of nuzzling Andrew softly, murmuring his thanks for the trust, and kisses him before continuing.

[jeansmoraeu-blog]

the foxes as things i've overheard at art camp

neil: i haven't slept in two days but i can still hold this pencil [pencil is shaking in hand]

andrew: i'm gay and i like this knife

kevin: my son has abandoned us for soccer— he's dead to me now

aaron: do you think this white pastel is actually just powdered pills solidified again

nicky: 'someone called me straight yesterday' 'i'm so sorry'

matt: not all heroes wear capes, bro

dan: 'yeah i'm a feminist, i'm wearing pink even though i'm a guy' 'that's not feminism, bitch'

renee: everyone is beautiful...

allison: ...but some people are more beautiful than others

seth: 'there's a lot of hostility going on in here, isn't there?' 'oh yes, there is'

BONUS

wymack: i used to avoid them, but then i realized something— i don't give a shit what they think of me

abby: do not poison your body with expired plastic and chemical juice or i'll have to hold your hand all day

bee: aw, look at you guys with all the life crushed out of you, come chat with me about that if you want

jean: my goal today is to be as edgy as possible

jeremy: all my professors were like 'ugh, no one uses bright color in serious artwork,' and i was like 'SCREW THAT!' and used Lisa Frank colors in everything

riko: i want to use a dead body in my art, like in the horror movies

[hsinliuvega]

[hopewas]

can we just talk about the concept of “neil josten”? nathaniel, after being born living under his mother and father’s mafia ties and his broken childhood of just running away over and over and over again. nathaniel had no identity, nathaniel was a name on a death certificate. nathaniel was a ghost of a memory. nathaniel was a figure in the butcher’s shadow. a thorn that was supposed to grow into a deadly knife. but his mother changed that. she fought. nathaniel didnt even get an ounce of affection except when it was a sick metephor justifying his mothers anxiety and control over his interactions. nathaniel was trained to be mirage, a quick image; so fleeting you could question it ever being there. nathaniel had nothing and he suppressed everything to run and run and run.

but neil josten, however, was a kid who slept in the locker room and built himself back up. he started exy again, from stratch. he survived for the sake of himself. he allowed wymack to sign him. he gave up the little security he had. he questioned andrew. he fought kevin. he gave kevin his game. he confided in matt to make sure andrew didn’t find his binder. he gave up what he was willing to manage. he trusted andrew. he cared for andrew. he didn’t push andrew. he questioned riko. he called out riko. he told riko to fuck off. he completely destroyed riko’s cycle of control. he allowed himself to be angry. he fucked up, a lot. he succeed, a lot. he encouraged kevin to stop being second best. he questioned the concept of hope bc he wanted hope. he wanted to belong. he wanted home. he wanted exy. he wanted his identity to be more than a fake name and date of birth. he stopped surpressing. he let abby hold him. he let abby worry about him after baltimore. he allowed himself to process what happened to him in baltimore. he risked everything for something bigger. he risked everything for himself, and for his foxes. he made the calls true to his heart. he is unapologetic and straightforward. he has nightmares and fears of being dragged back into that shadow of where he was Nathaniel. but he is neil abram josten now. he became neil the moment he signed to the foxes. neil josten has an identity. he has a home. he isnt perfect, he will never be. he had dan who has been patient from the beginning, he had matt who watched over him from the beginning, he had wymack who sternly reminded him that he can leave his past behind, he had andrew who, in his own way, gave up the missing pieces to neil’s security. when neil became neil, he allowed himself happiness and freedom that nathaniel could have never experienced. and that’s some fucking character development. (feel free to add)