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This is a SERIOUS amount of sweat. It represents my "sins" from the week.. It represents a mediocre workout week.. It represents not letting my "so-so" week get me down. Each moment is a new beginning. Yesterday I was like "I will gladly pay you tomorrow for a hamburger today".... Well I paid. It sucked. But I was here! BOOM! #iamnotagrunter #butsomepeopleare #wow #therearechildrenhere #thatgirlagain (at Gracie Barra Texas - Draculino)
I'm a Badass
I woke up last Monday morning and thought to myself, "I'm going to be a total badass this week." I had spent the weekend making plans and preparing meals staring all my obstacles in the face and prepared to own this week like a boss! It started out SUPERB! I armed myself with my Shakeology, my snacks, fantastic lunches that I'd prepared in advance, and even had dinner completed. Off I went each day to my job, thinking ahead, making a plan to get the tasks done at work so we would be on time with deadlines. I had accounted for EVERYTHING! Or so I thought. I didn't account for mental exhaustion. I didn't account for emotional well being and those roller coasters that go along with being stressed, frazzled, and overwhelmed.
This is nothing new for me. I am more aware of myself than before and know what my 'triggers" are, I just didn't prepare for it when I should have, knowing what the week held in store for me. At times, I can be really good about recognizing that it is an emotion driven response and can walk away... other times I recognize it and say "screw it, I'm eating this anyway", then there are those ugly times when I just don't think. By Wednesday I was feeling the stress and exhaustion set in. I walked away from a meeting pissed off, grabbed a mango I had brought, and stomped off to the kitchen to cut it up. While this is a MUCH better choice than junk, I had to stop myself and pull it together and say "Self? WHY are you about to eat this mango?" You know, emotional eating is emotional eating any way you slice it. If I was about to eat this mango because I was emotional, would I be satisfied? Probably not. I would likely inhale it and start looking for chocolate next. It's my MO. I checked myself. Again.. Why am I about to eat this mango? I am going to eat this mango because it is my mid morning snack.. And it's been about 3 hours since I had my Shakeology breakfast, so it's time to eat and it's justifiable. I am eating this mango for nourishment for my body... Not for my emotions. If emotions aren't recognized, you may fill it up with food, then you are eating for the wrong reasons no matter what's on your plate. You are giving in to a bad habit. So after taking a moment to pull myself together, exhausted and all, I peeled this delicious mango in all it's beautiful, soft glory. As silly as this sounds, I actually found it therapeutic to peel it softly and slowly knowing that I was about to eat this to nourish my body in the way God intended. Sort of taking a moment to appreciate the beauty of it and give gratitude for it. I savored every yummy, juicy bite and felt completely satisfied. *Well that sounded a little more erotic than I intended, but let's just go with it!* So it was beautiful and perfect! Right? RIGHT! Unfortunately I didn't use the same tactics for the rest of the week. My week continued to grow frustrating and hectic and I gave into the emotional roller coaster. Now that these are fresh on my mind, I will plan accordingly and arm myself for the upcoming week, knowing this will be just as hectic and demanding. Only I won't arm myself with good foods, I will arm myself with tactics to pull myself together and even use the "phone a friend" option to my accountability partner in my challenge group if I need to!
Taking care of yourself isn't limited to putting the right foods in your body and working out (which I have been kinda kicking ass in the workout department lately, I must say). It's also about finding a balance and taking care of all your needs: Physical, Mental, Spiritual, and Emotional. I know "Emotion" is a scary word.. but we all have them, like it or not. Men and women, alike. Might as well learn how to work with them instead of against them! Lately I've spoken with people who, too, were stressed and overwhelmed. It's important to take care of you first, then you can be your best for your family and your job and your life. What are you doing to give back to yourself? What are you doing to feed your spiritual, emotional, and mental hunger? Let's here it! Share your story with me. If there is one thing I've learned, we are all in this life together.. instead of pulling against each other... let's rally up and help one another! So go on... give it to me straight! ;)
There's a Little More to the Story..
I introduced myself in my first post, but if you'll allow me, I'd like to give a little more of myself to you. I'd love to tell you that it was all bowls of cherries and rainbows, but I won't sugar-coat it. It's been a journey.. and I don't regret One. Single. Thing.
It was during a shopping trip with my mom for a party dress that I couldn't find anything fun and sexy. Everything I brought in the dressing room totally fit my personality.. but fitting and working with my body was a whole other situation. It was frustrating! Nothing looked good on me and it really brought me down. My mom sat there sort of helpless. I could see that she wanted for me what I wanted for me.. to feel good.. to feel sexy.. to feel confident in myself. I'd finally found a dress... A BIG PURPLE GRANNY DRESS. Think Bea Arthur in the "Golden Girls"... sexy huh? RAWR! :) Anyway.. in that dressing room, she offered up a challenge. She would buy the stinkin "granny" dress with a condition: lose weight and I wouldn't have to pay her back; don't lose weight, I'd simply have to reimburse her and no love lost. Half heartedly agreeing to the challenged, I walked away with a planted seed and an action.. something that was doable if I set my mind to it. But it was more than that. She called me out... she exposed what was really in my heart. There were so many things that I'd sat out of over the years because I was either too embarrassed to try anything or I just COULDN'T do it. These thoughts made this challenge more appealing.. I was tired of sitting on the bench. I wanted to participate! I decided the only way to do it.. was to get off my ass and MOVE IT. It was like a switch.. I'd suddenly wanted to be healthy for ME.. I wanted to teach my children to make healthy choices and be active so THEY wouldn't be left sitting on the bench. I was so driven that I'd lost 80 pounds by making healthy choices in food, overcoming food obstacles, working out and making THIS life my priority. I was feeling great and was so passionate about it and about helping others that I had to spread the word! I used to equate it to finding God.. When someone comes into a spiritual relationship they want to shout it from the rooftops! That was me! I was that girl!
I soon turned my life into something completely different. I educated myself on fitness and nutrition, worked out like a machine, and eventually built a business on that. I became a Licensed Zumba Instructor and Personal Trainer. SHOUT OUT TO ALL MY ZUMBA MOMMAS! Ok.. focus. I spent the next 2 years trying to grow my business and be an example, but the reality of it for me at that time was that I was a newly divorced, single mother trying to build a business in a small town with no real business network. I became stressed, depressed, and overwhelmed. I felt like a failure as a mother, because while I made this change to have more time with my kids and doing what I loved, I was spinning my wheels to build a business. At one point, I remember teaching up to 8 Zumba classes a week.. getting up at 4:30am to train my clients and going to bed at mid-night because I was still so wound up from my Zumba class.. not to mention the my mind going full throttle! I was completely off balance. My nutrition was spiraling out of control, I wasn't getting *MY* workouts (you know those 'good for the soul' kinda burns?), my mind was a mess, and I was gaining weight back. I was also struggling financially.. I had to go back to the office grind.
"Everyday in every way I am getting better and better" ~Émile Coué
I have spent the last 3 or 4 years finding my balance. I have loved food and have been pissed at myself. I have had pity parties and drank about it. I have also healed and I have searched my soul. I have learned so much in this badass life and everyday I am becoming the warrior woman I was always meant to be! I have re-committed to myself and as I go forward creating the next chapters of my story, I will share with you obstacles that I struggle with and how I will overcome them! My Monkeys (aka: children) have even gotten on board! They keep me accountable, motivated, and also want to keep active and make healthy choices right along with me! It is so NEAT to see them coming up with creative ways to help me.. to help our family! They even went as far as to make an Instagram account to encourage kids to be active and make healthy choices! They are ALL IN! Sooo... if you're browsing Instagram and want to follow them, be on the look out for "Little_Workout_Warriors" and you can follow me and my progress on this blog, Facebook ( facebook.com/luckyace7 ) or even on Instagram at Hippie_Gypsy_Girl . Go find us!
Since I have first 'found my fire' in July, I am down nearly 25 pounds and counting! I have felt compelled to share my life and struggles with anyone who cares to listen. You may be thinking of making a change, yourself.. join me! I'd LOVE the company! I went back to the beginning of my story and I have found my fire, once again. There's more to come.. I am #thatgirlagain . Stay tuned!
