i have a few drawings i only posted on twitter. idk if i Should post them here too or what,, Anywya this isn’t one of those drawings this one is spiritually tumblr
ive officially lost it but I havveee to say something so---
you guys know the movie I saw the tv glow, yeah? I watched it a bit ago for the first time and something that has really stuck with me afterwards is that it really feels like Asriel (or even ralsei, (s)he would definitely be suppressing that shit since (s)he's "supposed" to be the prince, I can def see it) to me. transriel.
here's the tl;dr of this post: basically I'm just making up stuff about a character we have never seen (and about dess too lmao) but like--- my trans Asriel headcanon is that she is Owen (will not use isable since he never chose that or truly acknowledged his transness and therefore never fully embraced being a girl so Im gonna respect that even thought it's not good). Azzy = Owen (though in the sense that she fills the role in the dynamic with dess and takes a while to figure herself out, not that she really represses everything and refuses to acknowledge it, though I think that it is something she might do? its hard to accept yourself as trans even when you know its fine. though maybe that's just because I have an unsupportive family.... idk) and Dess = Tara with... the same? ish? ending. though I have other headcanons for that at the moment that I think would be cool (but are ultimately never going to be canon probably lol). a lot of what I have to say about Asriel being trans comes from my own experience with denial and stuff but like... I figured it out way before she did so....
btw idk which word is better to use- repress or suppress-- so uhm sorry in advance. also this post gets long so
firstly before I get into my thoughts on it, please go look at this post by @/hugdog.
also, here's this post by @/nmbrs that helped lol (because no matter what happens in the actual game, this is canon and true about them)
and now, my transriel and dess headcanons that will forever be true always and always (maybe)
ok so. as stated before: azzy is Owen, dess is Tara. also disclaimer: I'm a trans man not a trans woman and I would assume the experience is different for the girliepops so yeah.
anyways, lets get into it!
Asriel getting a lot of her sense of fashion from dess. Eyeliner, dyed hair(fur?), possible piercings tho my design doesn't have those.
She gets a lot of her sense of self from dess— she spends time with her and starts listening to more alternative music instead of the religious ska she usually did. She starts doing more adventurous things then she normally would. She starts experimenting more with how she presents herself then she normally would. She starts to realise its so much more freeing to be a girl, more comfortable, more authentic…
But she buries it. She's the “golden boy” after all, how could she be a girl? Sure, she knows about trans people. Hell, she's friends with trans people, her sibling is freaking nonbinary for fucks sake! But she can't be trans— it just doesnt make sense. She's always been a boy. And until now, she never even minded all that much! Granted, she never really thought about it, just went with what she thought she was supposed to, but… wouldn't it have been more obvious?
Asriel ignores it. It's not a big deal. Dess goes missing. Everything is falling apart. She doesn't have the time or energy to think about it. She doesn't have the energy to ignore it.
She gets to college. She's trying (and failing miserably) to move on. Looks in the mirror. She doesn't see herself. Asriel is looking at stranger, at a man.
And then…
She sees it.
After that, unlike Owen, Asriel embraces it. She was raised in a lgbt+ positive environment and wasn't taught to repress or hate or hide or fear or whatever else queerness. She's seen how her trans friends are so much happier as themselves.
And the biggest part of her finding her identity was becoming friends with dess. Experimenting with alt fashion. With makeup. With clothes in general, not even particularly alt or feminine ones. Just things she didn't normally wear.
I pulled some of that from my own experience there. When I first began to question my gender I thought I couldn't possibly be a man or whatever. I first decided to identify as gender apathetic, because I didn't really care that much… I thought. I do care, actually. Then I identified as agender, because I genuinely had no idea what was going on and assumed it was nothing. It was not. And finally I landed on demiboy- and it doesn't fully capture everything maybe? But I'm happy with it. I'm happy to call myself a man, or trans, or nonbinary, or demiboy, because they're all true. Anyways. Point being: I never thought I could be a man or anything super complicated at all at first and I denied it hard. And now I've applied that to Asriel Dreemurr.
Ok, now on to Dess.
(I did this on biblical worldview classwork btw lmao all of these drawings are from one Friday in school the brainworms were very active)
It's safe to say Dess was a bit of a rebel. A bit of an alt kid. A bit of a punk. A bit uncomfortable in her home, maybe? A bit uncomfortable in her life? In her skin?
She disappeared for unknown reasons. Presumably led off into the forest by the pointed tail with azzy and Kris (and prob Noelle too), never to be seen again.
She loved music. She played guitar, watched music videos, potentially wrote Raise Your Bat. She supposedly didn't appreciate authority, chafing under her controlling mother (Though one could argue Carol was better then and got bad after dess's disappearance due to the loss). She spent a ton of time with asriel. She could even have been involved with dark worlds somehow.
We know she cared a lot about Noelle. We know she smacked people (kris) with a waffle bat when they were mean to her.
Maybe she wanted to dissappear. Maybe she told asriel and asked for her to go with. Idk.
Dess has been headcanoned as a lesbian, as a transmasc guy, as butch. Perhaps she, like tara(maddie), is more ambiguous? Maybe she's nonbinary. A nonbinary lesbian. Dessriel T4T yuri.
I'm gonna be honest, I have a lot less to say about dess then I do about asriel on this front--- I have headcanons about her whole disappearance (well. a head canon? a crack theory? yeah. that.)
but what I have to say about dess's disappearance (that I think is really cool but probably isnt) is pretty long so I'll not get into it here.(this post is long enough as is lol. also I haven't really thought these out very much just kinda formed them yesterday while watching dawtde so... yeah. and yes they are inspired by dawtde, why wouldn't they be? that's all I was thinking about while watching it. well, that and that I really love Derek and avery's dynamic I think they're great. not as a ship tho, I don't mind the ship but I see them as more familiar. also I swear I saw somewhere that Avery is 17?? and derek is in his 20s???? idk).
if you wanna see my thoughts on the dess disappearance (which I don't really know that I believe) they can be found here. I did not provide any evidence. might be a fun read tho idk. maybe I'll go back and find stuff to use to support my claims but I think that is very unlikely. considering what I'm saying.
all my other transriel an dess art I made that Friday (noelle is in one too!):
when did flowey's egg crack / when did she find out
I like to think it was some time when she was friends with mettaton or mad mew mew in one of her runs and seeing how happy they were after transitioning but then she probably totally repressed those thoughts and decided they were just idiots like everyone else.
I personally think that only after everyone had left the underground and she was trapped with her thoughts that she really started accepting it, and when she eventually left the underground she probably started socially transitioning but it was only for herself so she never really had the full conversation about it with everyone else and just told them to refer to her however they want because it doesn’t matter to her how they see her
