Distrust is the main culprit in all such misunderstandings leading to miscommunications. When one perceives a thing with a false assumption of knowing the truth without trust, undoubtedly, everything will lead to fallout.
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Distrust is the main culprit in all such misunderstandings leading to miscommunications. When one perceives a thing with a false assumption of knowing the truth without trust, undoubtedly, everything will lead to fallout.
perhaps whumper was a medic and when whumpee meets Medic Caretaker they immediately panic and try to refuse any treatment/help but whumpee slowly begins to trust Medic Caretaker?
Hello! Thank you for the ask. I answered a similar ask before here but I have some newer stuffs for you too. Also I highly recommend checking out my #hospital whump tag for similar posts :D
- Medic Caretaker, piecing together that Whumpee has trauma related directly to the sight of medics, shows up to take care of Whumpee in casual clothes. They try their best to make the space Whumpee is staying at as home-like and different from a hospital as possible. They can also try to get Whumpee to receive care at home or at another place that feels safer for them.
- Medic Caretaker makes sure to appear the least threatening as possible: being very transparent about what they are doing, what they are going to do, asking if Whumpee is alright with it. E.g. them telling Whumpee that they need to reach around Whumpee to get something, and asking if Whumpee is okay if they touch Whumpee. They only do the things they say they’re doing, and stop as soon as they know Whumpee is tense/uncomfortable.
- Whumpee, at first, is terrified of Caretaker and thinks that they are lying to get Whumpee to lower their guard. They obey Caretaker at first because they don’t want to get punished. They try not to flinch when Caretaker touches them and agrees to what Caretaker says just so they don’t get hurt.
- With time, however, Whumpee starts to relax more around Caretaker because Caretaker always keeps their words, and they are very perceptive of Whumpee’s comfort. They have stopped many times without Whumpee saying anything because Caretaker sees Whumpee’s discomfort.
- The first few times Caretaker stops because Whumpee flinches, Whumpee hold their breath, awaiting a punishment for being bad. That never happens, and eventually Whumpee stops thinking that Caretaker is testing them. Slowly, they try to vocalise their needs, just to test the water. They are fearful at first, but they finally feel comfortable enough to do it frequently.
- It helps that Caretaker is encouraging, and always smiles at them and says they are doing a good job to tell Caretaker what they are feeling. Whumpee realises that they are starved for that kind of positive reinforcement and can’t help but leaning into trusting Caretaker more.
- A part of them is still terrified that it is just an act and Medic Caretaker will turn cruel as their old Whumper once Caretaker’s patience starts to wear thin. They learn to ignore it, maybe with some help from their friends, loved ones, and/or a therapist.
Let me know if you want anything more!
I don't trust people anymore, anyone can betray you. Some people pretend that they care but they don't.
I wish I was good enough
It has become into a habit to add “If I’m still alive” whenever I bid goodbye or talking about a plan. At this rate, I’m no longer hiding how tired I am of living.
Even our families whom we share blood ties, memories since birth and darkness together will have no regret, hurting and leaving you on the sidewalk. I'll be a fool to believe in strangers who claims to love me, recite love poetry and to carve rings from the stars, could do more.
Having abandonment issues commitment issues and trust issues makes you so hard to love. And you know that. You know you’re not easy to love. And you’re afraid of people noticing that. You’re afraid to fall in love firstly because you’re afraid of commitment. You don’t want to get hurt and you don’t want to hurt. Then if you get past that you’re afraid they might leave you so here comes your fear of abandonment. What you tend to do is leave before they do. But once you’re even past that and in a relationship you start to question everything; things like <what if they lose interest> <what if I’m boring> <what if I’m not enough> <what if they don’t love me they I love them> <what happens if they leave> <what happens if I’m no longer important to them> <am I the problem> And you get sucked into this hole of endless possibilities of why they might leave you and you stand there filled with fear and doubt and the infinite questions of what if.
For those who have trust issue like me, it can be so hard to trust people again after they have broken ours. But you know what? Let's give it a try once again. Let us hope that this one will turn out fine. Let us not lose the hope that one day we will be appreciated as much as we deserve, and that people will finally keep the trust we have given them.