#tthinking

[satellitespinner]

mommh kink ellie #thinking

[antisisyphus]

what if i got a trampstamp of dandelions 

[enanansposts]

nmmmm too many thoughts..

[calialcaro-erutano]

[vickiwii-blog]

This is why you sleep at night.

I’m still not even sure who I was trying to be. Who was I becoming? And am I that person in a parallel reality? Did my mind shift over to the existing adjacent reality? Or are there two existing occurrences in which my mind has split and is just a part of one collective entity that can only be harmonized when all realities have run its course? But now I am a completely different person. When I look back at my photos from before it’s like looking at someone else in a different life, it looks like I just didn’t belong to that reality. What saddens me is that I don’t know what reality I belong to, and I have this sense of restlessness and impatience. Who am I? Why am I here now? And what is my path? But if I stay here all night trying to hypothesize these questions and come up with some theories of my own I would never rest.

All of this rambling can be summed up with some science and psychology. And I believe it is totally weird that we are literally just neurons and cells and connections. We are complicated but not so complicated, we can be dissected for understanding and comprehension. If only our questions could be so easily answered and researched. Imagine the possibilities, dissecting the mysteries of life with a scalpel scrapping away and making incisions to pull apart something so infinite and endless and abstract. Beautiful and meaningless, because why would you want to unravel all of the secrets? When being a veil of incomprehension is so pure and indescribable.

Okay goodnight.

[unusualrealism]

Just looking retrospectively, all my stress, anxiety, depression, and problems are derived from other people that I can't escape, especially my dad. If I could just live alone, live my own life, I'd be so much more happy and have less problems, which is why I'm excited for college, it's my chance to escape this poisonous hell I've lived in for 16 years, the only thing I'd regret that I can't control is that I can't set my mom free too.