Goodbye from The Hollywood Tower Hotel
I know this is really long, but I need to open up somewhat about this. For those of you that do read this, thank you.
Those words ring loudly in my head and have ever since May, 2004. I was 12 at the time and had avoided thrill rides adamantly up to that point. That single day in 2004 changed everything for me.
It started back in November of the previous year. I had received an annual pass for Disneyland for my birthday. I hadn’t been there since 1997 and couldn’t remember what the place was even like. At the time, Disney was seen as a kids thing. Being the preteen I was, I avoided talking about it among my friends for fear of being seen as less “cool.” This first trip was also the first time I’d see Disney’s California Adventure. As it had opened in 2001, I had not had a chance to go and experience it.
Upon arrival at the esplanade I was shocked to see this building looming over DCA’s skyline. My family and I debated what it was and if it was even in the park or just in Anaheim beyond. The words “The Hollywood Tower Hotel” stood out among the skyline. We were confused to say the least. This “hotel” didn’t feel like one as much as it looked like it. Our curiosity was piqued so we booked it into Sunshine Plaza and down through the Hollywood Picture’s Backlot. As we reached the Hyperion and turned the corner we were met with … Walls. But these walls made me the most excited I had ever been. Along the stretch of construction walls that lined the street were the words “The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror. Opening May 2004. Drop in … If you dare.” I was blown away. I thought I had never heard of this attraction before and shamefully learned I did know of it quite well when I got home that evening.
I was a big fan of The Twilight Zone television series having been raised with it among other classic shows of the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s. The Twilight Zone was paranormal, exciting, easy to grasp but complex in nature. It was everything I enjoyed in tv. To have an attraction entirely themed around it excited me. I was deeply curious about it so I jumped into researching it. Mind you, I had seen the Tower of Terror television movie but I never pieced it together that it was, in itself, based on something real. When I finally saw WDW’s Tower I was awestruck. I researched everything I could about it. I looked deeply into the attraction through fan sites and low resolution videos. I couldn’t get enough.
January 1st, 2004. I had made it a point to watch the Tournament of Roses Parade every year and this year was no different. I got up and watched in wonder as parade float after parade float turned the corner and showed off it’s detail. Late into the broadcast a looming building came into frame. It was so noticeable that even the broadcasters commented on it before it turned the corner. At 100 feet tall, the float “A Sudden Drop in Pitch” made me bounce off the walls. This floral ode to the coming haunted Hollywood retreat just blew my mind. Again I was energized. As the clock ticked down to May, I kept up with the attraction. I watched video after video, many of which seem to have been lost to time. Gallagher and the sign lighting ceremony stands out as one of the stranger ones.
Finally, May arrived. I booked it to Anaheim about the second or third week of it’s opening. The lines were massive (for the time) but I stood there, eagerly awaiting my turn to “drop into the zone.” The lobby was lavishly furnished, every crack and speck of dust seeming to tell a story. Everything stood out to me and I could barely soak it all in. When we entered the library I stood in wided eyed wonder at the shelves of books and the raging storm just beyond the window. With a flash of lightning came the story of that fateful night long ago. The eerie intro, the echoes of a child singing, the thunderstorm just beyond. I was lost. Dragged into an episode of Rod Serling’s anthology of terror. As our huddled group wandered into the boiler room the sound of pipes clanging and furnaces roaring gave life to this dead building. The heart was still beating, long after it’s veins had rusted and faded. The gloomy bellhops throughout encouraged our group forward, helping us deeper into the depths of the hotel. As we arrived at the service elevator, my heart was racing. I was nervous, I was scared, and I was excited. I stood with sweaty hands watching the dial slide down slowly to “B.” The doors opened to our final bellhop who loaded us into our rickety elevator. The sounds of screams echoed throughout. Everyone was nervous. With a devious smile the bellhop bid farewell and the doors closed on us.
A lurch backwards and flashes of lightning dragged us beyond the depths of the Tower and to the front door of The Twilight Zone. I gripped the handlebars of the elevator seats tightly. I was terrified but entranced. We moved up and in front of us was a grand mirror. A bolt of lightning and we turned into ghostly reflections of ourselves. In a flash we were gone. The empty elevator carriage sat staring back at us. We descended to a long stretched hallway. 5 ghostly apparitions beckoned us to follow them. The hallway grew dark, stars glittering all around. Those same 5 guests beckoned one final time from a distance set of elevator doors, then they were gone.
We plunged into darkness.
As the sunlight stung my eyes, I could see everything. In those couple seconds I viewed the distant horizon of Disneyland and Anaheim. Before I could even process it we were falling.
When the elevator came to a rest with clanging and bangs, cheers erupted from our elevator. We had survived. As we returned to reality we were greeted by our haunting bellhop one final time before we drifted toward the gift shop.
I was in love. Everything about this ride captivated me. In one single ride in May I became obsessed. I collected everything I could afford. I bought pins, I got shirts, picture frames, posters. You name it, I tried my best to buy it.
That summer I spent working on a digital rendering of the Tower of Terror in LEGO form. I wanted a replica of this attraction for me. I wanted my Hollywood Tower Hotel. I spent weeks studying every angle, looking at picture after picture. I tried so hard to detail this model out of little blocks. When I finally finished and sat back, I was, for the first time, impressed with myself. There in front of me was a LEGO rendering of the Tower of Terror. I immediately set to work. I used every LEGO brick I had and when I ran out, I bought more. After the 6th tub of bricks I stopped. It was getting too expensive. With the need to paint the LEGOs afterwords, I shelved the project till I could reasonably get everything I needed.
Still, I ached for replicas. My brain kept latching to LEGOs and after a couple years I tried again on LEGO’s official Digital Designer program. As I reached the half way mark, I decided to check the price for the massive Tower of bricks I needed. The program promptly crashed. I selected a third of the building and copied it elsewhere, then tried again. After a few minutes the price popped up. $1800. I gasped and was discouraged. I couldn’t realistically shell out almost $2000 for just a segment of a massive project. Again I shelved the project and looked for alternatives. I stumbled on a now defunct YouTube channel HomeImagineering. The channel featured someone building custom miniature attraction variants using materials like foamcore. I also stumbled on Sam Towler’s Mine Train model and was inspired. My dad ended up bringing me home some foamcore poster board and I went to work. I carved windows and doors. I tried to shape out the Tower of Terror with foam and paper. It made a terrible mess and I was never able to figure out how to best support the massive structure. Eventually I shelved this project too.
As DCA started it’s 2.0 conversion I was at the parks almost every other week. Tower was my go to for a must ride attraction. I had memorized everything about it. The layout, the script, the drops. I loved it still. It was a classic to me and I desired nothing more than to be a bellhop. I started applying but got nowhere. It wasn’t until fall 2012 that I hit the jackpot. I was hired on October 13th, 2012 as a DCA Stores cast member. I started on Buena Vista Street and came to know many great people through that fall and subsequent winter. I still ached for Tower. I wanted to get photo training so I could work the gift shop, but my true dream was to transfer to attractions and fight my way to Tower. Unfortunately that dream fell short. I quit Disney in late April 2013 due to medical problems making it hard for me to continue working. I dreamed of going back, but for the time I set my dream aside to focus on school.
In February of 2016, a rumor sprouted that the Tower of Terror at DCA was to be changed to a Guardians of the Galaxy ride. I was scared. A part of me tried to ground reality and tell myself that it was way too stupid to be real. There’s always rumors and they almost never happen. As time moved forward the rumor persisted. The original leak kept insisting it was real and continued to detail the changes to come. Petitions popped up, attempting to fight the truth in the rumor.
In July, 2016, at Comic Con San Diego, Disney announced that Guardians of the Galaxy: Mission: Breakout! would take the place of The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror. I was heartbroken. Here was something I had spent 12 years of my life involved with suddenly dying in front of me.
The reason it hurt so much is difficult to pin down entirely. Looking back, I struggled greatly with depression and continue to do so to this very day. I was teased and bullied in school and there wasn’t much of a way for me to escape. My home life was okay, but fighting between my parents and the affects of what caused those fights strained the household. Disneyland was my sanctuary, and Tower, to me, was my escape. I could be someone else with Tower. It gave me confidence and it inspired me. On nights where I might have been struggling, where my mind drifted to thoughts of suicide, I spent them at a computer, designing and building, and connecting with the Tower fan community. I made friends due to the shared passion for something that is as simple as a ride at a theme park. While my depression never healed, I was able to fight it back through this passion. As time pushed forward, I lost connection with a lot of these Tower fan communities. Many faded away or died as time marched on. I lost connection with the friends I had made and struggled to maintain my happiness. When I was forced out of high school, I spent a lot of nights with these fan communities, and suddenly they were gone. I held onto the memories of the conversations had and the stories shared and still kept returning to the parks with hopes of finding new friends and people that could be a part of a Tower of Terror family. When I worked there, I wanted nothing more than to be a part of the Tower, but my diagnosis of fibromyalgia and the worsening of it made that impossible. With the announcement it felt as if my heart was ripped apart. Everything from the past 12 years shattered instantly. I know I have the memories of this attraction and the joy and happiness it brought, but with me it’s not the same. Those memories are sad now, reflections of a history and point in time where there was an escape for me. It sounds stupid, even to me, but Tower was more to me than just a ride. Everything about me was connected to it. I built my life on that ride. My education and major was directly inspired by the ride. I wanted to one day craft something unique and amazing. Something that would inspire another the same way I was inspired way back in 2004. The change of this ride also spoke to the climate inside Disney. The corporate meddling and orders from higher ups that have no reflection on the guest satisfaction but instead on the easiest way to sell things now and to forget the long term. It hurt to see a company so good a hiding their corporate side suddenly flashing it for all the world to see. Their reckless disregard for the masses of fans and for the terrible show caused by this change is unforgivable. The Tower died in September, 2016, when the sign was pulled off unceremoniously. Ever since it has been on life support, being kept barely breathing as they slowly strip away what made it unique.
Some of you might say that there is still Walt Disney World’s Tower (and Paris’), but that isn’t the point. To me, DCA’s was the Tower of Terror, original or not. It fit the world crafted in that park. It told it’s story perfectly and dragged you into the hallowed halls that once held lavish parties. It was my definitive version.
On January 1st, I attended the 13th Hour party. There I met two wonderful Tower fans and celebrated this attraction in a way no other attraction could ever be celebrated. Disney did a great job on a party that should never have happened in the first place. That night, on our final elevator’s return, our bellhop greeted us crying. That’s when I noticed that every bellhop had been struggling to choke through the spiels. It sunk in. I felt the shockwave of this loss throughout yesterday and struggled till the very end to maintain myself. In the end it was too much. As I sit here writing this, I find tears streaming down my face.
For me, my year ended last night. 2016 has frequently been personified as this taker of life, this year of the reminder of our own mortality. We did lose many great people in such a short time, and while that can be explained by the years from which these greats were born, it doesn’t change the fact that we desire someone or something to blame. 2016, for me, took one last life. It took something I found sacred and tore it away.
Walt Disney said that “Disneyland would never be completed as long as there is imagination left in the world.” This isn’t a justification for the change of something loved and enjoyed, but a reflection on the shifts of guest’s desires and wants. A story goes that Walt overheard a child wish to ride Jungle Cruise only for the mother to refuse, stating that they “rode it last time” and “didn’t need to this time.” Walt was mortified. He went about shifting what the ride’s purpose was, giving the skippers freedom to spiel in a way they felt fit. Jokes and comedy became the ride’s signature and to this day is beloved by many. He didn’t rip it out because it was stale, nor did he retheme it. It was still an adventure through a jungle, but instead of a serious documentary tone, it took on a dark foreboding joking aesthetic. Tower was loved, and the massive lines and 300% merchandise sale increase proves that guests still wanted it. The change for change’s sake should only ever be done for the betterment and improvement of something. Guardians, especially to me, is no improvement, and does neither Tower, nor Guardians justice.
Today I struggle to push forward. My future feels shaky and distorted. I am uncertain of where I am to go next and while I will continue to try, the desire to just lay down and give up is very strong. So with this I say goodbye to The Hollywood Tower Hotel and the The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror. I hope, as Vera Lynn sang, “we’ll meet again. Don’t know where, don’t know when. But I know we’ll meet again some sunny day.”