Working in retail stories:
first day in had a grumpy old lady come in complain about soap, she wanted the pure white block of soap, we had it, she complained she couldnt tear open the package to see if it was pure white despite the package stating (and me reading it) that it is *white* and she had a problem with "snowflakes" only ever wanting liquid soap now, despite the wide selection of bars of soap in front of us; she left grumpy saying tesco has it cheaper, so she had gone
a young woman came in, asked me for makeup advice, and despite not knowing a lot just basics i did my best. Well. she was looking for a foundation in her skin tone, darker than mine, and was germaphobic, so she didnt wanna try the tester on herself. So i was the test rabbit. Customer service right? Oh well, it doesnt end there. It became apparent she was drunk, and she had to put on good but simple makeup to get one over on her ex, which, okay, but when her vodka breath and despair hit my nostrils that predicted shenanigans already. To be specific, she asked if she could try the foundation on my hand. Thinking she'd put on a smol dollop i agreed, that's how you usually test a tester, right?? Right??! No!!!! She put a LOT on MY FOREARM and SPREAD it like WALL PAINT all over my arm!!!! ALL OVER IT I COULDNT EVEN REACT i just went welp i hope we got micellar water in the back. We didnt. But we had acetone! Stonks. So anyway that shade wasnt correct, so we tried a second foundation and guess what SAME THING HAPPENED DESPITE ME TELLING HER IT'S BEST DONE ON THE BACK OF YOUR HAND OH MY GOD BOTH MY ARMS ARE COVERED IN FOUNDATION THAT DOESNT MATCH ME (i am whiter than snow white) ah shit and then she asked about eyebrow pencils,,,,, thankfully she didnt need to test that nor would i allow her to clown-ize me, so she took those, thanked me (gotta give her credit she was very nice) and bought that.
I hope she's doing okay now
I had two highschoolers come in and one of them, much taller than me, sheepishly approached me and said "excuse me, do you have vaselline?" And my brain did error.exe cuz listen, I'm new, i dont know where half the shit is but i pointed him in its general direction while his friend said " you see? You ask such dumbass fuckery bullshit not even the poor girl knows which side of your ass it came from"
I laughed
Also, to be honest, never EVER fear that the cashier judges you for buying anything, i swear to you i am too focused on the bar codes being scanned and your store card and how to return money if you pay in cash than the mini condoms you apparently think matter or so
More to come
