#whengodissilent

[krissnightsworld]

Thought It Was God, But It Was Me

There was a time I swore it was God.

The way things felt so intense, so real.

The way the connection mirrored everything I prayed for.

The way I held on, believing it was divine timing —

when all along, it was just me.

Hoping. Longing. Naming my ache as “God’s plan”

because that was easier than facing the truth:

He wasn’t the one.

I confused desire for direction.

I mistook stillness for a sign.

I gave my heart permission to hold on

because I thought letting go meant I didn’t trust God.

But now I see...

It wasn’t God that kept me waiting.

It was me —

too afraid to admit that something I wanted so badly

might not be mine.

I’ve learned something sacred in this pain:

God doesn’t whisper confusion.

He doesn’t play games with my heart.

He speaks in peace,

not in the torment I called “testing.”

So this is me now —

healing.

Unblaming God.

Understanding that not every closed chapter was punishment.

Some were rescue missions.

Some were gentle redirections

disguised as heartbreak.

I still believe in divine love.

But I no longer idolize the idea of being chosen.

I choose myself now —

with clarity. With softness. With him.

[pastorinthehood]

There have been many questions I have asked “The Father”and I never received an answer. I always reflect on Jesus asking “why was he forsaken “? Then he still submitted His spirit into the hands of “The Father” in spite of never receiving a verbal answer to his verbal request? I’ve learned some questions requires your faith more than you receiving an answer!!! #whenGodissilent #enduringtheprocess (at In my Private Space) https://www.instagram.com/p/B4ljTqwF2v7/?igshid=15mytlut3cr1q

[godsowndivaclub]

Powerful and true words..thank You Lord for Revelation! #Repost @divatio with @repostapp ・・・ O for grace to trust you more🙏 ..Final thoughts on the matter @godsowndivaclub #WhenGodIsSilent #BreadOfLife #EyesOnTheMark #RefuseToBeJudas #GraceToTrustHimMore #Mentorship #GettingBetter #WinningWisdom #GodsOwnDiva

[godsowndivaclub]

More insights from the session.... "...keep going, don't loose sight of your destination. Remember life is a transition." #GodsOwnDiva #Breadoflife #WhenGodissilent #Judas #Focus #Determination #Eyeonthemark #Wisdom

[godsowndivaclub]

And Still on that thought.....Selah! "...the bigger your destiny , the bigger your Judas..." #wisdomkey #GodsOwnDiva #Breadoflife #WhenGodissilent #Judas #Focus #Determination #Eyeonthemark #Wisdom

[godsowndivaclub]

Thank God its Monday! 👆Highlights from our Bread of Life Session at the GodsOwnDiva Chatroom last week. The Lord blessed us with deep revelations. Follow the thread in the posts following. God Bless our @divatio! #GodsOwnDiva #Breadoflife #WhenGodissilent #Judas #Focus #Determination #Eyeonthemark #Wisdom

[oneclickfromchaos]

Midnight on Diversity

I met with one of our ladies last night at her apartment which is down closer to the lake. I take the bus and train to save myself...or maybe the other cars and street curbs...from parallel parking and the parking fees. You don't want to see me parallel park in the daytime much less at night...disaster! The Diversity bus back to the brown line was running slow and I had a twenty minute wait. It was midnight because I had lost track of time. I could walk to the train a lot faster than waiting in the 23 degree weather for a bus. As I started down the sidewalk, I began to feel uneasy. There weren't but a handful of people out and only a few cars. I realized what was freaking me out...the silence. The air is normally so full of sounds around me. In my home, in my neighborhood...it's just noisy. But last night was bare of all those sounds. It was creepy. And I began to become fearful. The silence and darkness and unknown arena of such quiet rattled me. I walked a little faster and prayed. God calmed me as people bundled up in dark coats and hats decided to cross the street abruptly right over towards me. I had also on a black coat, but on others at midnight in the city its much more sinister! God kept me from jumping out of my skin when a man walked quickly up to me out of no where asking for money to tow his car that was somewhere way over on another street. I felt my breathing slow and my heart rate settle. Those things happen to me often when I'm out, but it's always in the middle of busy, loud, city life so I feel more secure and safe. I can see lots of potential helpers and witnesses all around me. But when it is so still and quiet, I found I had fear. I felt so alone. It's like that for me when I feel God is silent or I cannot see what He is doing. The quiet stillness and lack of movement draws out my fears and doubts. Will he provide? Does He see me? Is He listening? Is He going to do this? Did He really ask this of us or were we mistaken? Will He change people around me? Are you really there, God? I ask myself these things when He is quiet. I stir around these kinds of thoughts when my security in what I can see starts to fade as my path is unclear. I don't know if you guys feel that when God seems still or chooses to quiet Himself. I notice it in my kids too. They fear when it's bedtime and they can't see the lines of their room completely because of the dark? When Dave and I are in the living room and not within their immediate sight they doubt. They begin to fear that quiet darkness too. I sang this song this morning as I thought about how my fears came out last night and I, even this week, had doubts of God's care. I love music. I love that it can sing a truth into my heart easily. I appreciate how God made us for music and music for us. Don't get me wrong...the only thing I play is the stereo, but I still enjoy music. This song is a great reminder for me and I use it with my kids as well. It reminds me whose I am. Who is my Father who cares for me. It's a great little song to tuck away in your mind when things get silent and doubts rise up...or if you find yourself out in a big city at midnight walking to the train! http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hVF4E7qbxco