#whystareatascreenwhenyoucanrant

[obsessedjuju]

Time flies by faster than it seems. How the hell is it July of 2015? One of my best friends from middle school is pregnant. Two of my friends are being overly dramatic and I refuse to tolerate it anymore. I have feelings for someone that doesn't even give me a second thought. I have two months left with my best friend being around before he goes away to college. The last conversation I had with my mom reminded me why I'm supposed to be in therapy. I seriously contemplated making a plan to run away, all I need is to save up for a new car and save one thousand dollars to settle into a new life, and I could disappear forever from here. I'd be surprised if anyone noticed I left at this point. At least I get to see my grandma tomorrow.

[obsessedjuju]

Personal. 12/11 - 6/11

Exactly 6 months ago I got dumped by the first guy I've ever been serious about. It's crazy how much has changed. Even though I still think about him, I hope we both can find real happiness, I know it's not us together. But six months ago I was planning on moving in with him and spending forever by his side. It's strange looking back. So Josh, I wish you the best, I hope you find the right girl for you & I hope that one day I find the right person for me.

[obsessedjuju]

It's okay, I don't like me either. Today is a fucking roller coaster ride of my emotions. It started fine. Then I had an anxiety attack & flipped the fuck out. Then I got drunk & went to a concert & had a blast. Now I'm on a downward spiral. This fucking sucks.

[obsessedjuju]

Idk why but I can not function today. I feel like shit, I'm curled up in a ball & listening to music as loud as possible. Today is the only day I have plans and I can't fucking move.

[obsessedjuju]

An introvert surrounded by extroverted friends

I absolutely adore my friends, but sometimes I have to remember that they value popularity and other people's approval above a regular friendship. Being one of the only introverts in my friend group sucks because I constantly feel like I'm not good enough to spend time with them because I don't have as many friends and when I do see them I get so worn out. I love them but I always feel so outspoken around them, they talk about their problems and open up and make friends with everyone and I'm just sitting here on my couch listening to Pandora in my PJs on Tumblr. I wish I could open up and talk about the shit that's been happening lately, but instead I'm gonna just sit here and sip some tea.

[obsessedjuju]

I can't seem to sleep anymore. I keep pulling all nighters and every couple days I crash for five hours, every time I wake up I've changed a little bit more. 

This song seems to be soothing me lately, I have such and obsession with ADTR. I wish I could see them in concert.