84. “You deserve so much better.” Benny & Arashi!
Arashi combed his fingers through his shaggy, black hair, moving it away from his eyes. Glancing over, he was his boyfriend staring at at the waves as they crashed against the sandy shore. It seemed like he was a million miles away in his mind. He been so quiet for days now.
Benny? Are you pissed at me or something? Arashi asked quietly.
Not looking back at his companion, Bennett shook his head. His hand crept over slowly to grip the other man’s, squeezing it gently. Not at all.
Arashi’s brows pulled together in concern as he continued to watch the redhead. Only recently had they officially started dating after a year of messing around secretly. He couldn’t help but find the timing of both the shift in their relationship & Bennett’s mood. Sadly he wondered if perhaps he missed Ezra, wishing he’d made a different choice.
It’s not you, Benny whispered as if he could read his boyfriend’s thoughts. It’s really not; I promise. It’s.. it’s all me. I’m sorry, Arashi.
Finally looking over, their eyes met & Benny could see the worry in his lover’s. Do I regret us?
The raven haired man sighed. Yeah, us. Do you regret not.. not choosing differently? I know you & Ezra….
Holy shit, the redhead groaned to himself. I fucking suck. I’m literally the worst boyfriend anyone could have. I’m making you think this isn’t what I want. I swear it is. I’ve waited so long for this. I love you, babe. There’s no regrets at all in that or this, he assured him, holding up their clasped hands. Pulling them towards him, he kissed Arashi’s knuckles softly.
Benny, what’s wrong then? Before we, he paused, breathing in deeply & inhaling the seaside morning air. You seemed happy when we spent time together. I want you to be happy, baby.
You make me happy, Arashi, Benny responded quickly, not wanting to give the man anymore doubt than he already held. I’m just fucking worried about whether or not I can be the boyfriend you need. You deserve so much better. You do. I know that you do. I want to make YOU as happy as you make ME. I just don’t know if I can or if I am even worth you wasting the time.
Arashi leaned in, cupping his boyfriend’s face in his hands as he stared deep into his bright green eyes. After a moment, his face softened & he let out a laugh. Shut up, Benny. You’re the boy I want & the boy that makes me happy. You’re fucking stuck with me now. Without another word, he pressed his lips hard up against his boyfriend’s & the rest of the world faded away.