The Wuss-ification of America?
I am fortunate to have met lots and lots of very interesting people throughout my life.
I know national educators on social justice topics, mixed martial arts fighters, police officers, school counselors, gun enthusiasts, anti-gun enthusiasts. The list of labels I could place on these unique and wonderful humans goes on and on.
I don't speak out of malice or accusation when I write this article about a phrase that is like nails on a chalkboard to me, but out of genuine concern and the desire to have a conversation.
Not long ago I read from a Facebook friend a sentiment that comes up fairly often- the Wussification of America is destroying this country.
Safe spaces, trigger words, the need to be coddled and up to their eyeballs in therapy for having to hear about opinions different than theirs has turned this nation's next generations of adults into wusses and now we're the laughing stock of the world.
I am torn on this subject because I see the points both sides are making, likely to the ire of everyone involved. So, stick with me as I make everyone upset by agreeing and disagreeing with both.
I do believe we need to teach resilience to all people beginning at a very young age, the ability to be in stressful situations where people dislike you or your ideas. I think this is where a lot of people diverge- do we teach people to react using their words and empathy or that is only the first step and the implicit threat of violence or actual violence are real options?
If we are going to have the conversation about resilience we have to address the elephant in the room which is that we do not teach children (who turn into adults) to value all of their emotions, but rather to turn around and run away from the uncomfortable ones. Some disengage completely, some mask them with addictive behaviors, some seek to acknowledge any of their emotions and instead only know how to grab the hammer of anger- but when you have a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
Should we set up safe spaces and use trigger warnings?
This is a hotly contested debate across the country. Some people don't believe that safe spaces are even a real thing- they only reinforce the norms of whoever has the most power at the time. Some say that they are a way for disempowered communities (LGBTQ+) to identify spaces in which they are able to fully be themselves without the fear of judgement of their identities.
Trigger warnings are awkward, but are they right? I don't feel like I can speak to this because I do not have anything that I would deem a considerable trigger. I know I do not like to talk about some things and I will ask to not talk about them, or use my power to remove myself from the conversation. But I see why some people are irritated that some college classrooms are being set up in a way that discourages conversations (even when someone states wrong facts, we're all there to learn after all) by demanding that we say nothing that will bother anyone. How do we then create educational spaces that explore these topics with them being harmful? Do we have that obligation?
Should content creators, tv shows, songs, movies, etc., be forced to provide trigger warnings in front of their products? In a way we already have this for some things:
Rated R for Graphic Violence and Sexual Content.
But should it go as far to list things that are specific?
Rated PG-13 for use of the word dummy and use of horses.
These things can be real triggers for people, but do we as a society at large have a moral obligation to sanitize the things that the majority of people enjoy for a few? My answer is no...but yes. No, we don't have a legal or moral obligation to do this for everyone for the simple purpose that it is not feasible to consider everyone. However, you can be an exceptionally moral person, as we often are, to those in your immediate circles- family, friends, coworkers, etc. What would be immoral, I believe, is not extending these to those in your care or that you hold power over: Children, work subordinates, people who need caregivers, etc.
Does anyone have the right to demand that you use or exclude certain words and phrases?
I would say yes they have the right, as all of us have the right to assertions. I would then say you have the complete options to agree or disagree with them. My hope is that if someone is saying that these words are hurtful or demeaning that you would either look further into it or consider what the impacts of those words or phrases are.
Should you go to jail or receive a fine for making fun of someone over the internet?
I don't think so. Neither does the law, which states you are protected by the U.S. Constitution. But I also believe everyone has the right to then call you a jerk and never want to be around you - which is also their right under the Constitution. But even though it may be fun or games for you, even beyond the harm that extends to that one person, you are letting everyone else know that reads your joke, edgy comment, or post, that you are not a person they may want to interact with or trust. It is your right, but that doesn't make it always the best option.
OK MR. KNOW-IT-ALL, WHAT MAKES YOU SO PERFECT?
Do I sometimes laugh at mean jokes over the internet or in movies over people's identities?
Yes
Does this make me a bad person?
That's up for each individual person to determine
Does that make me Racist, Sexist, Heterosexist, Ableist, etc.?
YES, EVEN IF I DON'T LIKE, REJECT, OR DON'T WANT THESE- MY ACTIONS THAT AFFECT THESE GROUPS MAKE IT SO.
I'm not here to say what is 100% right or 100% wrong. What I am here to say is that to outright dismiss what opposing views say does not further conversation or working together towards community- it only furthers ideologies that immediately benefit you. For some people those are acts of self-preservation and for some they are a barrier of entitlement. What I ask is that this starts a conversation about how we can all be and do better. Is there a Wuss-ification of America? No, I don't think so. I personally think that people are seeking out diplomacy in a system that has only valued violence and dominance. But maybe I think that because I am a wuss. What do all of you think?
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