#yosri

[wtvishaven]

So... I found out my rapist is getting engaged. I don’t know how I feel. Angry? Envious? Envious that he’s moving on and will be marrying someone he loves? Angry that he’s doing well in the relationship department all while he’s set me back like 10 steps? I just get so angry when I look at his face. I know I shouldn’t but I can’t help but search him up online sometimes. I don’t know what I expect to come out of this. I wish he actually had a fucking decent heart to give me a heartfelt apology. Does he ever think about that night sometimes? I hate so much it hurts.

[wtvishaven]

Sometimes I hate myself for not being able to bring myself to get revenge. I feel like I should. But I don't, because I partially blame myself. So stupid. Pathetic. So naive. Desperate. He ruined it for me. Or maybe not. Perhaps intimacy was ruined for me the moment i was born and raised by a mother like mine. I've pondered on plotting my revenge. Yet, I can't seem to find enough hatred for him. I don't know why. I still don't know why. I haven't been able to comfortably talk about it. Perhaps because rape isn't something people want to talk about. It's a conversation killer. A downer. So, I'll just continue to keep my mouth shut; like I have for him this long. I'll brush him off my mind while he continues to rape my memories. This entry has no specific theme. This is a compilation of my current thoughts.

[baraanabil]

(via https://soundcloud.com/baraa_nabil2/sets/yosri-fouda?utm_source=soundcloud&utm_campaign=share&utm_medium=tumblr)

يسري فودة - Yosri Fouda

[salahmah]

هزتني نسمات الليالي فتراءى ببالي طيف آلام مرير أبكتني صرخات الأيامى و أنين تنامى حول قيد وأسير تكويني شهقات الثكالى طعنات توالى دمعة الطفل الغرير مديني يا شراع الزمان لربوع الأماني لمدى زاهٍ منير يا أنسي يا نفائح نفسي فيكِ ليلي و همسي ودعاء المستجير من يدري يا صبابة صدري أرى ميلاد فجري يعقب الليل المغير عيناها نزفها مشتكاها حزنها وبكاها مسجداها والمسير سألاها عن بقيايا رؤاها أين يرنوا مناها فأجابت بالقدير من قلـبي يا حبيبة قلبي بت ادعو لـــربي أن يواسي و يجير من روحي يا رفيقة روحي جئت كي لا تنوحي أنت من روحي الكثير أنت من روحي الكثير

[dnaarts]

[kameliia]

الحمد لله ربي

[ http://snd.sc/17rfXRG ]