Hey Jenn!! @your-stitcher-thursday, happy holidays!!! Sorry your @stitcherssecretsanta2018 is coming to you three days late, let's just chalk it up to bad timing and no internet service. I hope you had a wonderful Christmas, and are heading into a very happy new year.
As a consolation prize for being several days late with your gift, I've included an aesthetic as part of this fic. I have to say, I had so much fun writing this, its been a really long time since I wrote anything stitchers related. Hope you enjoy this engagement au. Lots of love!
What Love Is
“Hey Cameron?” Kirsten called, walking from the bedroom into the kitchen. Early morning light, dulled by an overcast layer of clouds, filtered through the window and fell across the apartment floor. The weather report had predicted snow, but there had yet to be any sign of it.
“Yeah?” He called back, not looking up at her. Humming to himself, he flipped over a pancake on the stove. Technically, it was Kirsten's turn to make breakfast, but he'd woken up long before she did, and she looked so peaceful, he hadn't wanted to wake her. Also, she was a terrible cook.
“Should I be concerned that you have women's jewelry in your work bag?” She questioned as he heard her pad toward him across the hardwood floor. His eyebrows knitted together, confused, and he was about to respond when he turned to face her.
“What's this about?” She continued, an odd look on her face. He tried to respond, but as he stared at the ring box on her hand, the words seemed stuck in his throat.
“It's nothing.” He finally muttered, snatching it out of her hand. This earned him an incredulous look, and she pulled something from her pocket.
“So this is probably nothing, too, right?” Holding up her hand, he saw she was holding a ring--the ring-- between her fingers. Feeling the color drain from his face, he reached for the ring, but she jerked her hand away and gave him a warning look.
“Kirsten, please.” He pleaded softly, and after a moment's hesitation, she put it in his outstretched hand.
“What were you doing in my work bag?” He questioned gruffly before she could speak again. Turning back to the quickly blackening pancakes to avoid eye contact, he heard her sigh lightly and shuffle to one of the stools by the counter.
“I was trying to find that file from the case yesterday.” She offered, clearly waiting for his own explanation. Of course this happened, he thought as he moved the burnt pancake off the griddle. He should've known he wouldn't be able to pull this off without a hitch.
“My mom gave it to me.” He finally replied, turning to scoop the non-burnt pancakes onto the plate in front of her. She crossed her arms over her chest, and he risked a glimpse at her face. She was staring at him with a mix of confusion and amusement and irritation.
“Your mom gave you a vintage engagement ring?” She pushed harder, clearly not willing to let it go.
“It's not an engagement ring-” He cried in his defense, but she held up a hand to cut him off.
“C'mon Cameron.” She sighed, then reached over to grab his face in her hands, forcing him to look into her eyes. “No secrets, remember?”
Staring into her wide eyes, still slightly blurred from sleep, his resolve broke. Letting out a sigh, he grabbed her hands from his face and wrapped them in his own.
“Fine. It is an engagement ring.” He muttered. She rolled her eyes.
“Whose engagement ring?”
“It was my grandma's.”
“Am I really going to have to drag this out of you piece by piece?” She tried to sound irritated, but the corners of her mouth turned up in amusement.
“No, I just… well, I was talking to my mom a while back and I was telling her that we'd been talking about our future, and since we moved in together.”
“And she just gave you the ring?” Kirsten questioned with a raised eyebrow.
“Not exactly.” He pulled one of hands out of hers to adjust his glasses, which had slipped down his nose. “I kind of asked her for it.”
“Any particular reason?” She questioned quietly.
“Yeah, I was gonna use it to propose but now you've found it and spoiled the surprise.” The words, exasperated and rushed, spilled out before he could stop them.
For a moment, her expression didn't change, and fear gripped his heart. Was it a bad idea? He knew they'd talked about getting married before, but maybe she thought it was too soon? Or maybe she didn't want to get married at all? I mean, they'd barely unpacked, what if she decided that living with him was too much, and wanted to break up? Then suddenly she let out a chuckle.
“You thought you were gonna surprise me?” She laughed, looking at him in amusement.
“Well, yeah.” He grumped, crossing his arms over his chest petulantly. He still couldn't quite gauge what her reaction was.
“What exactly made you think you could surprise me?” Still chuckling, she rested her chin in her hands. With a surge of happiness, he noted that she was wearing one of his sweatshirts.
“I've had it for months and you hadn't found it yet.” He admitted, and her eyebrows raised in surprise.
“Really? Where'd you hide it?”
“Behind my Doctor Who boxed set.” He scratched his neck awkwardly, and she laughed again.
“That explains why I didn't find it. And what exactly was your plan to propose?” He could've sworn her voice stuttered on the last word, and it gave him a little more confidence.
“I had this whole plan,” He sighed. “There was gonna be a romantic dinner and music and a sunset, but that involved having it with me all day so you wouldn't get suspicious.” She smiled softly, reaching to wrap his hands in hers.
“And now I've ruined your whole scheme.” She replied sarcastically. Then, she leaned forward, pressing her forehead to his, and suddenly, it was like the whole world narrowed down to just the two of them.
“Well, Dr. Goodkin, what well-rehearsed speech did you have planned to convince me to marry you?” She whispered, looking into his eyes.
“What makes you think I had a speech? Maybe I was just going to come up with something in the moment.” He started back slightly, feigning offense, but she just raised an eyebrow at him.
“Okay, I had a speech.” Looking at the ring sitting next to them on the counter, his heart was suddenly racing. “Wanna hear it?”
“Sure. Maybe I could give you some feedback.” She teased. Even as he laughed, his hands were shaking as he turned to her, ring in hand. Taking a deep breath, he started to speak.
“Kirsten Clark, from the day I met you, I knew you were going to be a giant pain in my ass.” She made to defend herself, but he shushed her. “And, in that, you have never let me down. You're reckless and bull-headed, and your low sense of self-preservation causes me stress on the daily.” She was scowling at him, but suddenly his words choked up in his throat. He'd hoped that if he rehearsed enough he would be able to make it through this part without crying on the big day, but no such luck.
“But, despite all this, I've never been happier than when I'm with you. When we met, I was timid and overly cautious, coasting through life with no direction. You dragged me, quite literally, into a life full of purpose, and adventure, and pain, and joy. Since I met you, I've learned to be brave and to fight for those who don't have a voice. I've learned to trust and be open and vulnerable. I've learned how to be a better friend and partner and, honestly, a better person. You are so brilliant and so passionate and so brave. You have had so much struggle, with your parents, with the program, with learning to live and deal with your emotions, and yet you push onward with determination. You're the strongest person I've ever met. You once asked me if I knew what love was, and at the time, I couldn't answer you. Now I can: it's what I share every day, with you, and what I hope we can spend a lifetime sharing together. So, Kirsten, will you marry me?” He finished, barely able to choke out the words. He knew there were tears threatening to spill out onto his cheeks, but he refused to tear his gaze away from hers. She was looking at him with the softest smile, and her face seemed to be glowing.
“It's pretty good.” She finally replied, eyes bright. “Definitely could use some more work, though.”
“Really?” He croaked, smiling so wide he thought his face would split. “I thought I knocked it out of the park.”
“A masterpiece is never finished.” She laughed. “Wanna hear what my answer would've been?” He nodded, not daring to speak in case he started to cry.
“Cameron Goodkin. If I was a pain in the ass, it's only because you were horribly annoying. Yet, despite your habit of being overly worried about everything, and especially me, all the time, I love you with every possible part of me. For a long time, I didn't know what that meant, and I had no hope that I'd ever be able to understand it. You helped me through so much, more than I would have been able to handle on my own. You're kind and loving and smart and so compassionate. I'm so grateful that I have you in my life. I love you so much, so, yes. I think I will marry you.” She punctuated her words by leaning forward and pressing a gentle kiss to his lips.
They stayed that way for a while, pressed against each other, happy to simply exist with each other. When they finally broke apart, Kirsten laughed softly as she brushed wetness from Cameron's cheek.
“I'd say that was a pretty good rehearsal.” Cameron said softly, words thick with emotion. Kirsten laughed and pressed another kiss to his mouth.
“You forgot the most important part.” She said when she pulled away again. Bringing her hand up to their eye line, she wiggled her bare finger.
“Rookie mistake.” He chuckled. Softly, gently, he slipped the ring onto her finger. The pale purple stone glittered in the wintery light.
“Is that…” Kirsten trailed off, staring at the ring.
“The crystal I gave you?” Cameron finished for her. “Yeah, I had the stone reset into this one. I figured it could do an even better job of protecting your heart if it was a bit more portable.” Kirsten grinned contentedly, wrapping her arms around his neck.
“Hmmm, who needs a rock when I've got an amazing fiance to do it instead?” She grinned. Fiance. The word made Cameron's heart skip a beat, and with a soft smile, he leaned in to kiss his her once more.
Outside, strings of lights twinkled in the morning air, twisted around street lights and across storefronts. Slowly, snow started to fall, soft and quiet, blanketing the world in white.
