#youredoingkinwrong

[shadowfae]

(Luke again!) I'm not dead! I just had top surgery and then had to go back to work, I swear I'll be back at some point (hopefully sooner if I can get the stones to quit my job 😋) I'm keeping tabs on the community as best I can though, so hopefully I'm not too out of the loop when I inevitably post the, uh, like 20 asks I've had waiting for me.

I can't imagine coding anything, let alone a whole game? That's fantastic! And oh my goodness, all those essays 😵‍💫 that's a hell of a lot of writing, I'm super excited to read all of them! I've been meaning to draft something up about soulbonding, and something about transition while being trans and 'kin. There's so much to talk about! Gender as a concept has really been on my mind lately so I'm always down to see your thoughts on it, too.

I will probably pop my head in again before a whole year has passed, I can promise you that much! I know the feeling about the community seeming a lot more hostile lately, I think that's a part of why this break is taking me so long. It gets tiring after a while, sometimes you need to just step back and breathe. And when I say "you" I mostly just mean "me" LOL. I hope the rest of October treats you a little kinder at least, and honestly good luck with NaNoWriMo! I just finished a big bang myself that really wore me out.

Well, good luck quitting your job to go get something better, and congrats on the top surgery!! :O I mean, you can always just ask me to answer your asks for you, I love answering asks. :p

It's not even the first game I've programmed, it's why I went into IT, but goddamn I hate Java so much. Object-oriented programming more like kick me in the ass repeatedly because why the fuck not I guess. Variables don't go where they're supposed to and nothing's in the right place. I hate Java so much.

Gender's been on my mind a lot too lately, especially about what it means for me and what that might turn out to be once I'm free and back into the world post-pandemic. But I would honestly love to see your essays - especially about transitioning, I know Faolan'll want to take a look at that one once you've got it up there.

We'll see how the rest of October pans out, and I'll be back sometime in December to check in around finals and maybe spit out an essay or two!

I'd love to hear about all you've been up to since you last checked in with everyone, so do feel free to ramble in my inbox and tell me how it's been going. It's really good to see you again, even though it's only for a little while again! <3

[shadowfae]

Hey Lutetia! I hope I'm not being too presumptive but I was checking in on you (I follow you on my main blog and noticed you were having A Night) and I think you mentioned me as one of the fictionkin bloggers gone by the wayside. Unless there's another Luke out there? Well, of course there are, but you know what I mean.

I am still around! Just, uh, very busy lately. It's taking all the energy I have just to stay up to date with the regular goings-on of the community, or what's left of it. My blog won't be dead forever - but it's been a trying couple of years, this local Jedi soulbonder has spent most of it doing a lot of secluded learning about himself and his identity. I'm trying not to make this sound like an excuse, it's supposed to be a promise! I loved the community and I want to come back, just, it'll take some more time. You obviously know you're not alone out there, but since I'm around tonight I just thought I'd jump in and say hey.

I really am wishing you the best of luck with everything - and stay safe out there! I'll be sad to see you go, but I understand the reasons.

(And if you didn't mean "youredoingkinwrong" Luke, wow color me embarrassed!)

LUKE COME BAAAAAAAAACK I MISS YOU. ;~; You haven't posted in months, dude, I thought you left!! (But it wouldn't be that embarrassing if I was talking about a different Luke, I straight up didn't recognize Hallowedbone having three goddamn blogs on me because my memory sucks that bad. Wouldn't be the dumbest thing to happen in my general vicinity tonight.)

Honestly I've been having a few Weeks, really, October has been a trying as hell month with all the university work I've been jammed up with. I coded an entire ass game of Snake in Java. Java, I tell you. I fucking hate Java so much please just give me C++ I want to never code in Java again.

But I do want to stress that if I go, it's another year off from now. I have essays I want to write first, and that means finding the time for those. I'm not leaving without writing them.

I'm not kidding about having essays to write. I have a spreadsheet specifically to help me keep track. They will come out, and by the time I'm done, either I'll have patience with the goddamn community again or I'll have finished packing up and will be ready to go for good.

I honestly haven't decided yet, and mostly I just miss the community we had back in 2014, the same way I miss the homes I had in my canons. There's still a lot I want to do, and a lot I want to talk about, but I don't know where the space for that is anymore, and it's increasingly felt hostile here. So I dunno!

But please come back I know you're busy and I am too but I miss you ;~;