Why Andre Aciman is a F*cking Genius & My Soul is Transcending
During Elio’s conversation with his father near the end of the novel, Elio says, “Oliver was Oliver” as a way to sum up their relationship. In response, Mr. Perlman quotes Montaigne, saying, “Parce que c’était lui, parce que c’était moi.” Aciman does not provide a translation to this quote in the novel, and I was curious, so I just looked it up, and the part Mr. Perlman quotes translates directly to, “Because it was he, because it was I.” The broader and fuller context of this quote, however, is, “If you press me to say why I loved him, I can say no more than it was because he was he, and because I was I.”
Obviously this quote in itself carries a lot of beauty and power, but I read it and something I learned in my philosophy class struck me. We just recently spent a decent amount of time studying Aristotle’s Nicomachean Ethics, which is basically just a treatise on how he believes humans can go about living their fullest and best lives. He argues that humans must work to acquire virtues, which are the qualities a human can possess which make him or her inherently good at being a person. Once virtues are consciously cultivated, people can achieve happiness, which is the Highest Good, or something we desire for the sake of itself. We also wish for all other things on account of this highest good, so essentially, we do anything in hope of obtaining happiness.
A virtue that Aristotle regards most highly is friendship, which he says is a form of love. He goes so far as to define three types of friendship: friendship of utility, friendship of pleasure, and complete friendship. Friends of utility are friends because they benefit from each other, and friends of pleasure are friends because they enjoy being together. Aristotle argues that these types of friendships are easily dissolved, but a complete friendship is lasting because it is when two people are friends because they love each other purely because they are who they are. They wish good upon one another simply for the sake of one another.
I have no idea what sort of philosophical background Andre Aciman has, but based on the sort of ideas Call Me By Your Name explores, I feel like he’s certainly studied it. And if I am connecting this correctly, then he is saying through Elio and Mr. Perlman’s conversation that Oliver and Elio achieved this most complete form of friendship, which is a form of love, which is a form of happiness, which is the supreme gift humans can allow themselves. Aristotle also discussed how complete friendship is rare and often difficult to reach, which parallels Mr. Perlman saying, “You’re too smart to not know how rare, how special, what you two had was” to Elio. Finally, since Aristotle views friendship as a virtue, which are examples of goodness this means complete friendship is also an example of goodness. “He was good, and you were both lucky to have found each other, because you too are good,” Mr. Perlman says.
I am blown away. I am almost upset by the luminosity in this, I am euphoric in the truth. I am feeling the weight of this story in every crevice of my body. To have an author construct such a meaningful narrative with complicated characters who love, despite its messiness, for the sake of loving is such a gift for readers to immerse themselves in. Oliver and Elio loved each other simply because. Because they saw the beauty in each other, which allowed them to acknowledge beauty within themselves. And this love stays with them forever, because if it were ever to disappear, they would no longer be themselves. Complete friendship. Lasting love. Supreme virtue. Transcendent happiness. It all comes full circle.
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