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Lema, please, please answer this question. I am sure this is a deficiency in my understanding (and it's causing me a lot of doubt) but I am having a very very hard time understanding why concubines were allowed in Islam? I don't understand why they were taken in the first place and how that was fair to the wives at that time or the female prisoners of war? Isn't intercourse outside of marriage haram so why was this permissible? I really hope that you can clarify this for me iA.

Waalaykom assalaam!

I think Omar Suleiman did a phenomenal job explaining this topic, so imma link you!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9be8TkbFShI&t=3s

I have a question regarding alcohol. Does a person who is around those who drink, fall under the (40 nights deeds dont count)? Im a muslim and Ive been around alcohol all my life, weddings, parties, peoples houses you name it. It has only struck me now of this. I love going to weddings even though im not drinking alcohol tho I'm still touching people who are drinking it. Is it clear somewhere that states that it applies even to the person who is surrounded by it? cause i keep googling.

the alcohol related question anon* better yet theres alcohol in my own home, like i cant win, everywhere i go theres alcohol. its very unfair but ive tried my best as a muslim praying in my home and stuff even though i cant change that fact. i have no power over that. i kindly appreciate your response of a direct source, much deeper than the hadith (having to do with touching, selling alcohol).

Salaam :)

The ruling specifically deals with consumption. What you have no power over is something completely different. You can’t be punished for someone else’s actions. That being said, I would discourage anyone from placing themselves into a situation where they are around alcohol i.e. going to happy hour with your work friends or attending a mixer where there is alcohol. I get that sometimes, these things can’t be avoided, but there’s a difference between not being able to avoid the situation, and having the power to do so. I’ll leave it in your hands to decide. Insha Allah that helps!

Salam, I think it was you who posted about women in the masjid and how it's not in the tradition of the Prophet SAW to prevent women from spending time there. But specifically for itikaf or qiyam, is it permissible for women? My parents are strictly against the idea of women spending nighttime in the mosque and my masjid doesn't allow it either so i was just wondering

Waalaykom assalaam.

It is not prohibited, and they’d be hard pressed to find evidence that it was. However, it may be a safety concern that they are taking into account.

salaam! sorry this is such a random question but a long while back I remember you answering an ask about a speaker who ended up saying that it was okay not to wear the hijab and that you were sad or disappointed to hear that from her, do you happen to remember what her name was? i honestly just want to know where she was coming from when she stated that, like was it an opinion or did she research it (btw i'm pretty sure you're tired of the hijab questions at this point, sorry if this is annoying

Waalaykom assalaam

I don’t think anyone would have considered this person a scholar, and her argument was that the “hijab” was just a cloth to cover the breast area and not the hair. I don’t really wanna point out who it is because Allah knows best, but as far as I know, that opinion is invalid.

why would muhammad represent islam in the seventh century...what would happen to people who didn't know abt islam bc it didn't exist in the after life? kinda confused hah thank you

Generally, the idea is that people who have never/aren’t introduced to Islam will not be held accountable for their ignorance. However, there is the notion that everyone will be exposed to it in some way or form in his/her lifetime.

Dear Lema, we met once in 2014 when I was taking the Seerah intensive class in Dallas. And we even talked a bit about mutual friends that we both know in the east coast... anyways, may Allah reward you and bless you for this beneficial blog. I had a questions about how you wear your hijab. The way you wear it is very beautiful and suits you tremendously. Would you please tell us how you wear it? Or maybe make a video of how. Very appreciated!!

Salaam love :)

I hopped around Youtube for a while to look, but it’s not even a style. Like, I throw it on. The girl in this video does it essentially the same way, but mine is just messy and without a pin. Insha Allah you’re well!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2DCbtkeqwaY

Salam! I have question about fasting while playing sports? What are some tips to help out and is it possible?

Waalaykom assalaam!

I’m sorry this is late, but for future reference, STAY HYDRATED. I drink a gallon of water between sundown and dawn. And eat a ton of good for you food-- whole grains, protein, etc. Also dua lol.

Salam Lema! I hope you're well and I miss you. I went for Umrah recently for my first time ever and it was the best experience of my life. So much of my interest and desire to go there was influenced by your posts and photos of your experiences there so thanks for sharing them with us. I thought of you while I was there and made dua during tawaf that you would get to visit Allah's house again and again ♥️

Waalaykom assalaam :)

This put the biggest smile on my face. I’m so so soooo happy you went and had a great experience! It was never even on my radar to go because it’s just something that seems like a dream to me, so it makes my heart so happy to find other people who go for the first time!

Insha Allah the Angels have said Ameen to your dua and you’ll be returning soon ya rab!

Aslm. I'm quite sure this is not in your FAQ. :) You've been offline for a while relative to normal activity, so I'm just checking to see if all is well, inshaAllah. With all the madness we see in the news about the US, it tends to heighten fears about people like you that live boldly while retaining your Muslim identity. May Allah keep you and your family safe and healthy. Aameen.

Waalaykom assalaam!

Thank you for checking up on me :) I appreciate it. We have this notion because of social media and our entire lives being online that everything has to be perfect, or it’s not worth existing. That life has to be perfect, that we, as human beings, have to be perfect. And although we are incredibly blessed alhamdulilah, we are not perfect.

It’s been a rough academic couple of years tbh, and I’ve felt the stress of my studies permeate into my relationships with family, friends, and other people in a negative way. I’ve felt more short tempered, easily to anger. It’s not really a representation of who I am, but stress sometimes exposes itself in a bad way. My iman is either at a high or a low, and I can tell. My first reaction to it was to drift off, deal with the stress and not make other people have to. I was waiting for that year to be over to get back to just, being, and it finally is alhamdulilah.

I’m going to try to work on being around here more, if only for myself, because writing about God helps me get closer to Him. Anyway, Jazaki Allah Khayr :)

'But isn't that a problem? That you have a pessimistic view of God's Mercy, when He tells you He'll forgive you for any sin?'

Another good deed opportunity and another cause that hits close to my heart. People come to the clinic all the time with healthcare needs and no way to pay for access to them. The saddest stories I've heard are ones where people knew their condition was progressive but had no way to pay for the cost of treating it. Al-Shifa gives FREE primary healthcare to those in need, and they need help to keep it free! www.launchgood.com/al-shifa

My teacher told me that when you feel like you’re continuously losing, recognize that life is a game of chance. And the more you flip tails on a coin, the odds are, the closer you are to flipping a heads. The more you lose, the more you’re set up for a win.

Because Allah says that “with hardship comes ease.”

The ease is coming. You just have to be willing to wait for it and not get discouraged.

We look back and find that most of our problems are created because we’re trying to find permanent relief in a temporary world.

اللهم ارني حقيقة الأشياء كما هي Allahuma areenee haqiqat al-ashyaa ka ma hiya Oh Allah, please show me the true reality of all things as they really are.

Salaam!! How was was your Umrah experience with your father this year?

Waalaykom assalaam :) It was good alhamdulilah! I was working, so I didn't get to see him as much as I would have liked to, but alhamdulilah. I'll tell you a story since I'm never on here anymore for those of you who ask me for some positivity. My dad has always had an aversion to going to the Haram and Mecca/Medina in general. I've never seen him miss a prayer no matter where we are masha Allah. I remember once when we were young and in Disney World, it began to pour rain, and baba couldn't find a place to pray. So he prayed outside, in the rain, with a poncho as a rug. Anytime I go to him with a verse of the Qur'an asking him something about it, I only need to say the first two words, and he finishes the recitation for me and tells me where it is in the Qur'an. When I first started studying Islam, he was the only person I was comfortable discussing religion with. These are more quantitative gauges of religion, but my dad is always someone I've aspired to be like, religion wise, masha Allah. No one has ever or will ever treat me as well as he does Alhamdulilah. Since I first went to Mecca, I've been pushing that he come with me. Asking, inquiring, then begging, pleading. For years. But something was holding him back, and I was never sure of what it was. He just wasn't into it, and I was beginning to accept that. Last March, I was doing my circumambulations (tawaaf) at umrah, and I was texting my dad telling him I wished he was with me. One of my teachers was being pushed in a wheel chair next to me, and when he saw me crying, I told him that I just wished my dad could be with me. So he told me to make baba a video of the kaaba, of all of my friends and I doing tawaaf, and telling them how much I wished he was with us.Fast forward to December--that same year--and there I was, meeting my dad, in the last place I thought he would be, in the mosque of the Prophet (pbuh). He smiled at me and said, "Did you ever believe I'd come?" As my parents get older, my heart breaks for not loving them more when I was younger, for not taking care of them, and for fighting them. But sometimes we have to go through some bad to get to the good. And I'm so, so thankful alhamdulilah. Don't give up on your duas just because they aren't answered the first time, or the second time, or the hundredth time. Because they'll be answered eventually, and when they are, you'll be glad you waited :)

If you ask God to bring you back to Him, don’t be surprised when He removes the people from your life who have served to take you away from Him. Don’t be surprised when He removes your distractions from you; He’s making it easier for you to serve. Because having God in your corner is the best thing you can ever have.

Sometimes in our efforts to get what we desire, we forget why we wanted whatever it was to begin with. We lose sight of our initial intentions, and our methods become muddy.

I’ve been finding recently that I have to renew my intentions much more regularly, to reconnect with Allah and realize that I’m working to please Him, only, always. It becomes more difficult to do in times of stress.

But my solace continues to be You, ya Allah. Because nothing and no one can fill my heart if You are missing from it.

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