the south platte: journal

[thesouthplattejournal]

i closed my eyes,

and

walked aimlessly

beneath

the rays of your

warm sun,

and…

[thesouthplattejournal]

it was good, but not enough. 

[thesouthplattejournal]

do the others

help you process the emotional trauma you’ve experienced as a result of your relationship with your mother? i think not.

[thesouthplattejournal]

it’s hard to remember the things you’ve lost, when you’re just trying to fit in to white American culture, and the cute blonde in algebra

[thesouthplattejournal]

and if it should end, remember i was the one who showed you the sun.

[thesouthplattejournal]

partly because you give me attention, mostly because you have a nice

apartment.

[thesouthplattejournal]

i can’t quite explain why i miss you so much, but if it’s real then,

i hope

you miss me, more.

[thesouthplattejournal]

do you remember how i used to love you?

some days, i wish i didn’t give you up. "song title” always reminds me of our relationship. do you remember how i cried at the end? it’s been so long, and we were just a  normal flame. still, i miss missing you.

[thesouthplattejournal]

true love or

a sea of real, real lovers  that will do whatever you want

new york, i love you

[thesouthplattejournal]

sometimes you let him save you, and sometimes you don't.

[thesouthplattejournal]

it’s okay to be weak, you’re real it’s okay to be honest, you’re real it’s okay to let go, you’re real you’re real you’re real

[thesouthplattejournal]

This is a drawing of you asleep on the porch. Your arms swinging off the ledge. Your hair tangled with the smell of summer, of sadness, of hope.

Sometimes we lose the things we love, no matter how much we love them. I waited for you the next morning. I knew it was over, but I loved you and I waited. No one said a word. What was left, but the imprint of your sadness, your hope?

[thesouthplattejournal]

i remember kissing you in the rain. i wish you weren't still mad at me, i still love you very much.

[thesouthplattejournal]

yes, i want you more, but no, you are not enough

[thesouthplattejournal]

i spent months drawing your limbs sprawled across my bed, i tried to keep you, but in the end you were just in my head.

[thesouthplattejournal]

how do you feel about dating super self involved boys,

who teach you how to love yourself.

because

[thesouthplattejournal]

you could be sadder, but do you want to be?