i just want to be thin

I'm not pro anything block don't report please. I'm just posting my own guilt. Height: 5'3ft sw: 226lb cw: 212lb gw: 130lb ugw: 120lb

[thinplease1227]

im just gonna make a series of tv show characters i always wished i could be.

[thinplease1227]

i just want to be her!!!!!

[thinplease1227]

“body positive”

its 2021 right? all i see on social media now is body positivity this and that. i want to be body positive but it is such a lie. tell me that all those skinny girls out there would be ok with being fat. and that a fat girl wouldn’t jump at the chance to be skinny in a heart beat. they say guys like curves and thick thighs save lives. but all you see is skinny girls getting liked for saying “love your body” when they would hate themselves if they gained a single pound.

[thinplease1227]

i feel like people have a misconception of what it means to be anorexic. i was officially diagnosed with anorexia nervousa at 15. i was 150lb at the time. its a mental condition not a size. I’ve been told I’m to “big” to be anorexic. what does that even mean, its as if the want me to get worse.like, oh I’m not skinny enough for my diagnosis (makes new goal weight ).

[thinplease1227]

my ed

I’ve had an ed for longer than i can remember when i was hospitilized at 16 they wouldn’t let me look at the scale. when i got discharged after a week the first thing i asked was my weight. i lost 11 pounds. its one of my favorite memories. however i got “better” and after Covid i gained 80 pounds in 1 year. my doctor told me that, and then he said i should lose weight. so here i am 15 pounds down in 1 week. thank you doctor you triggered my ed (implied sarcasm). :)

[thinplease1227]

[thinplease1227]

i used to be not that much bigger than the other girls i was “normal” but all i would here from the kids my age was how huge and fat i was. i just want them to look at me and think “she’s thin”

[thinplease1227]

when i look at food i want to cry.

[thinplease1227]

something i wrote...

food is a dangerous game

eat to much and feel the shame

not enough and there’s no way

you could walk a mile in the day

is food the enemy?

a constant memory

that each bite is farther from

that look you desire but still you succumb

[thinplease1227]

is it bad to want to be thin?

ive hated my body since before i can remember i try to be body positive but always end up back to not eating or purging. is it so bad to just want to be thin.

to want to look in the mirror and not hate what you see?