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almost home
Origami Around
Show & Tell
seen from TĆ¼rkiye
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@unchoixalafois
I am doing too much
I am doing tooĀ much
Ok, so over the summer at some point my website crashed. Iāve always had this WordPress for blogging and I decided to give Squarespace a try. Now, Iām waffling between here and Square space. Do I keep this for blogs and squarespace for general website stuff? No idea. No sure what to do here.
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Conspiracy to prevent us from gathering
Conspiracy to prevent us fromĀ gathering
How much fear is out there right now? From the shootings to the lingering silent COVID floating around picking and choosing who to infect, how scared are artists to create with others? what does this mean for the future of theater and other community events? I came back home in April a little over a month ago now to start rehearsal for a new work. Nene was also due around the same time as thatā¦
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I release thee!
I finally put The Kaylamay Project out. It only took a year and a whole ass pandemic to let it go. I donāt know why I was holding on so much. But it feels good. Iām inspired to get back to my storytelling..itās been a few years now. Iāve put my process on the back burner for work, which happens. When Ed went full time actor in 2019 I was so jealous. I wish I had the bravery to do that. Now thatā¦
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Oakland to Harlem 2018 - 2021
Oakland to Harlem 2018 āĀ 2021
When I look back on all the writing I did those years I was trying to āfind myselfā I notice that thereās a vulnerability in the breaking down of a person. I wrote from such honest spaces, itās cathartic to read them again. Re-member those moments that I felt alive in the newness of small, but calculated decisions. I found bliss in the smallest things. I gave myself permission to make bigā¦
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Sitting in drafts for 2 years..
Sitting in drafts for 2Ā years..
I stuckĀ Lepidolite, aĀ āstone of transitionā,Ā on my forehead yesterday as I was walking to the gallery to perform my 1 human show. I often get stones in the moments and let them charge in the sun before I absolutely need them. This was one of the 2 stones I grabbed before leaving the house yesterday. ā LepidoliteĀ assists in the release and reorganization of old behavioral and psychologicalā¦
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January 9th Reflection
Vacation mode powering offā¦ Spent a week and and some change in LA with my Bubs. Here are some highlights Fb world and future me who will see this in a year and wonder what we we did in no particular order: Ā * Had dinner with Ashraf Dahud twice was introduced to the most bomb food Iāve had in a long time, * Caught up with the coolest parents in the world Charlette Ilene Rawls and Richie Ferrisā¦
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The Kaylamay Project
I woke up before the sun today. I feel like itās the first day of school and Iām so excited I barely slept. Will probably go back to bed after this. I am trying to practice gratitude and self love. And I am also trying not to feel guilt or shame for the choices I made. Being present is a life long practice, and I need to remind myself of that as well. I donāt wake up suddenly and find myselfā¦
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my own advice
I donāt know if I should even begin this post. I know it wonāt come out nice. But ever since I could remember I have never been able to take my own advice.
Iāve met my match and I honestly thought that was that. Challenges have amplified. Simple roadblocks have become big facts.
Maybe iām overreacting? Maybe iām not grounded as Iāve had myself believe. I want to run away, I donāt want to admitā¦
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Lent: Update #2
So of course my stubborn ass has had dairy even though I said I wouldnāt. Iāve learned that it fucks with my skin and hair. Damn hormones.
I have definitely been on instagram to promote my current show and keep track of social media for the company I work for.
We have been out to eat a few times
and because of how busy this week has been and the quality of my skin these days, makeup hasnāt been aā¦
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Lent update 3/13/19
Cheese/no dairy
Well, I tell myself not to have any cheese and then of courseĀ almostĀ every day this week I had some thing with cheese in it. The cheese tortellini fucked me up the most. Iām for sure in denial about my lactose in tolerance.
Red meat
Last Saturday, we definitely went out for Korean BBQ so thatās also been successful.
Social Media
I havenāt checked instagram or twitter once.ā¦
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What would you let go of for 46 days?
What would you let go of for 46Ā days?
Iām giving up and letting go of the following pleasures for LENT:
Going out to eat. Iāve done this once before when I was living in Santa Maria. I think I was pretty successful! Weāll see how it goes this year.
WearingĀ makeup. Iāve never done this. But more and more I realize how much I rely on makeup to make me feel a certain way. With my discovery of contouring and filling in my eyebrows Iā¦
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The Eve before the 27th
The Eve before theĀ 27th
I donāt know why I keep thinking that this day is more important than my actual birthday which is tomorrow. And I donāt know why I have such a weird relationship to the number 27. 27 is the only 2-digit numberin which the sum of digits is equal to the sum of prime factors. According to Google. And thatās cool but what significance does that have to the human life? The 27 Club has always felt likeā¦
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Monday 2/11/19
Iām always caught in between āis this a sign from my Ancestors? and anxietyā Between āI will do it! and what will?ā Between āhelp me, and I got itā I really donāt know. Iām upset and frustrated for no real reason, no logical reason, other than I donāt know. I donāt know. I have no answers. Not for what Iām feeling. And not for what Iām experiencing. Itās the unknown, and it scares the actual shitā¦
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Hair everywhere
Our rent is late. Last week I found out while I was teaching that it was my last class. After 3 years of teaching babies, Monday afternoon was the last Iād ever hear āBaby Sharkā again. (with the exception of once during the weekend) Although I knew this contractās end was inevitable, I was sad. And even more stressed out because I had no income come Friday. So here I am Saturday about a week andā¦
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This is a warm up
This is a warmĀ up
Iām having the hardest time trying to find the motivation to write my show. Iām supposed to have itās first draft done by the 1st. I will have the first draft done by the first and I will not limit myself. But damn this is hard. Like, I want to do too many things. And I wish I could be more clear but I just WANT TO DO IT ALL. I remember vividally seeing those 24 hour gym billboards that saidā¦
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Tired of listening
Myths exist because someone saw something happen that inspired them to write. Or maybe before the age of technology, monsters really existed and they were real beast that we could see and feel, and be eaten alive by instead of words on paper. One eyed, fire breathing, real actual fucking beasts. But then it changed. Time changed. We were stripped and cracked open as so was mother Earth. Violenceā¦
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Naked eye
I want you to fall in love with my soul.
I wish you would see me past my physical form.
There was a look in the beginning I thought you had for me.
The kind that others see
and say,
āhe looks at you in a certain wayā
Where did it go? Did the mystery disappear? Did the flame blow out? Did I mistake that look for something else? Is it because Iām always around that you donāt look at me with thoseā¦
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