Yeah, you know me and my pleasure with sweets. I eat them everyday! For breakfast, as well! What? You can’t have sweets for breakfast? Tell that to the person who invented donuts, muffins, and sugary cereals. I will NOT sit down to a meal unless I have dessert! Even a vending machine snack can count as dessert.
But I bet you’re wondering, are there any sweets I don’t like? Of course, you’d expect me to just laugh it off, and say “That’s impossible,” but I am not without any weaknesses.
Soooooooooo…. Here’s a list of some of my least favorite sweets, in non-alphabetical order:
[*WARNING*] I mean no offense to whoever actually likes these kinds of treats! My opinion does not reflect on facts. Forgive me if I sound too snarky.
Licorice; The black stuff is usually seen as the outcast of candy, but I say both colors are criminal. It tastes like fruit flavored cable wires.
Sour candy; Candy is supposed to melt IN your mouth, not melt your mouth!
Red hots; Peppers belong in tacos, curry, jambalaya, and buffalo squawker wings! Who decided to put them in our candy?!
Root beer; Blahhhhh. Did someone just add sugar to the real stuff? Now that deserves jail time!
Plum pudding; Death on a plate.
Carrot cake; I’ll eat my vegetables, but keep them out of my dessert!
Protein chocolate; Why???
Fondant; STOP PUTTING “EDIBLE” SILICONE ON CAKES! Cakes are meant to be eaten, not strutting their stuff on the catwalk! I don’t care how pretty you make them look! Fondant sucks!
I may have left out a few, but who has time to listen to me complain about my least favorite sweets for hours? Besides, I’m getting hungry. Looks like it’s ice cream for lunch! Yay!