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Oh Diddy...

When Cassie’s lawsuit hit, there was some shock, not because of the allegations, but because she actually filed. Rape and physical abuse. The internet went nuts. Because a woman’s trauma, well it never just belongs to her. The whole world has to weigh in. To tell her what she did wrong. Ask her why she stayed. Yeah. They always ask that. Why did she stay? Diddy settled that one within record…

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#Cassie #Diddy #domesticviolence #Whydidshestay

Wasn't My Fault

The first time, I told people. I was a kid, under 10. That should have been it, right? Nope. It wasn’t. At least to my knowledge it wasn’t. If my daughter came to me, at any age, to tell me that some man, well, did what was done to me, I’d kill him. Flat out, I’d kill him. The second time. Hmmm, that’s harder. I knew him since I was young. He knew the first story. The first story was a joke, to…

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He Called it Love. Nope. Wasn't Love

He told me he had been in love with me. “Man, I was so in love with you. I told my wife. I had to get out of that place.” I wanted to believe it. But I also knew that Me Too had been a thing. We were looking at sexual relationships differently. Did I want him arrested? His life ruined? No. Did I want some acknowledgment that what happened was wrong? Messed my life up? Yes. Then I think of it…

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Groomers and Gaslighting

If you are 34 and engage, or attempt to engage an underage person into a sexual relationship, you are a pedophile. No? What if said 34 year old person has known the underage person since they were 10? Maybe before 10, maybe shortly after, but definitely during adolescence. Is there ever a scenario where you know someone from 10 up, as an adult, and ever think that sex is in the future? Between…

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#groomer #Grooming #innocent #photographer #rape #survivor #victim

The Victims of Assault and the Supreme Court

The first time someone attempted to rape or sexually abuse me, I was, well, I don’t remember the actual age, but it was under 10. He told me he had a snake. He pulled my bathing suit to the side and told me where he wanted to put his snake. I don’t know why, but I had the, is confidence the right word?, whatever it was, to tell him I was out. And I ran out and told grownups. For years, it was…

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#Grooming #rape #Supreme Court

Triggers

Triggers. I hate that word. I hate it because I feel like I should be stronger. Isn’t that silly? That a victim of sexual assault, of grooming, of any kind of sexual abuse, or really any abuse, should be stronger. When I was a little girl, I don’t remember how old, a way older neighbor was playing some sort of game with many of us from the neighborhood. He brought me into a tent and said we were…

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#Grooming #MeToo #sexualassault

2020 - The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

2020 – The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

2020 has been horrific. I mean, it started off ok, but then…, well, do I have to say it? So I promised the good, the bad, and the ugly, but it may have been a false promise. Haven’t we had enough ugly? I could go on and on about Congress and $600 stimulus checks, but I’m feeling something else. I’m a big proponent of the whole when life throws you lemons thing, even when I just want to throw…

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#2020 #Covid-19 #Kids

My Vote

Today was the first day to vote early where I live. I stood in line. Standing in line was new to me. I’ve voted since I turned 18. I have never had to wait in line before. Some would say that shows my privilege.

Over the years I have voted both sides of the aisle. I have been a registered Democrat and a registered Republican. I have voted across both of those registrations. Today I am a…

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With Age Comes....?

With Age Comes….?

Today I ate almost an entire loaf of Italian bread. I should mention that it actually wasn’t Italian, it was a French loaf, but, it is the bread I have bought for years, and served when I make sauce. I try to make sauce every week, but life gets in the way.

So. Life.

One day I was in labor, for all of two hours. The next I was dancing with that kid at his wedding. It is still all a blur.

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L G B T Q

There are people I love who also happen to be gay. Times have changed. Unfortunately, not as much as I’d like, but, when I was growing up, being gay was a more difficult thing than it is today. I heard kids I grew up with called the “f” word. Hurling “gay” as if it was a dirty word was acceptable. It was something that could be devastating, especially for those who were not gay.

The Supreme…

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COVID and the Single Girl,I mean Woman

My kids have recently reminded me of my single status. It is a status that I have been very comfortable with. I mean, I haven’t been a nun, but, I haven’t really been out looking. And then my daughter decided that I should try online dating.

Please spare me the “I met the love of my life on Match” stories. I’m sure it has happened. It is just not my thing.

Still, I tried it. For less than…

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Quarantines, Exes, Exes, Quarantines

This quarantine sucks. I know I’m not the only one tired of being stuck in the house. Even with phases moving us into a little foray into Home Goods, we’re still basically locked down. The hard part is, well, there are a lot of hard parts, but the part where I can’t go to work or the gym or to a restaurant, or any of the things I’d go do to not be sitting home dwelling, well those are hard parts.…

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Breaking Down Great in America

This pains me to write. No. Really. I always try to see all sides. Even when I disagree, I try to see all sides. But this make America great thing? Well, first off, the first four years. Did it happen? I guess not if it is a campaign slogan. Again.

I love America. I think we are the greatest country in the world. I don’t say that as some kind of, well, I hate to even say it, because, well,…

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The New COVID-19 Normal

Today I put on my facemask and gloves. I hate writing that, but it is what I did before going into a store to buy things like soap, shampoo, toothpaste, food, toilet paper, oh, and a luxury item, a Kit Kat bar. Well, because sometimes when you’re locked away from everything, you could use a little wafer mixed with chocolate.

I’m not a selfie kind of person, but I took one because it felt beyond…

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COVID-19-ADDICTION-FAMILIES

Today was Easter, our first one in lockdown. I did a drive-by birthday parade for my brother with my siblings. I cooked some fish. I wished some friends a happy. I went on social media and liked a few things. And then I sent a text to a kid, well, he’s not a kid anymore, but he’ll always be a kid to me. He grew up in my house.

Not long ago I was told that he wasn’t doing so well. I was given his…

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Life in Quarantine

It is only day 587 of this quarantine. My liver is probably gone. I’ve done some questionable things, from a social distance. And I’ve taken time to reflect on my life. Yeah. Great stuff.

First I will say this one thing. Thank God this shit didn’t happen when my kids were younger. I miss them being young. I miss little hands and sweet moments, but, how I thank God regularly that I’m not locked in…

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#Coronavirus #Covid-19

Getting Through Corona

There is a possibility that I was wrong. Mark down the date because I am never wrong. But this Coronavirus, well, it got me. No, not as in I have it, but that initially I wasn’t worried. Oh, btw, I still want addiction to get attention like this, but for now, I bow down. Coronavirus, you have humbled me. Still…

First, I’m fortunate to be able to work from home. It is a huge pain in the ass video…

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#Coronavirus #Covid-19

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