about the chaos

nothing to see here

[about-the-chaos]

If ever given the change

Don't encourage your sons and daughters to be kind. Kindness for the sake of kindness is faulty. Kindness shouldn't be a personal trait, but a moral concession. Teach them better things instead. Honesty. Competency. Hard-work. Boundaries. The world has no patience to those without them. It will wage a war against them, so teach them to be prepared to fight. Don't abandon them in the battle of Life with flowers in their heads and no guns in their hands. You are the veteran, you know it.

You are not their friend. And you are not the enemy. You are a parent. Might as well be a good one. Good luck.

[about-the-chaos]

[about-the-chaos]

Hush! Hush!

Little baby

Don't say those words

Why would you say them just to hurt?

Don't you know when some words are said

You will regret and it will be too late?

[about-the-chaos]

The world is round

So grand and wild

From side to side

I wish i could glide

Meet many people

And see many sights

One of these years

I still believe

I shall try

But if my lack of habilities

My dreams compromise

I shall not be bitter

In the big world i'll still reside

[about-the-chaos]

So laughter is this phenomenon

Better with a friend on your side

It starts in your belly

And shakes your whole body

Soon you're breathless

Your eyes tear up

And your head feels lighter

Some laughs are giggles

Some are close to sneezes

Some scratch the throats

Of smokers

When it comes down to laughter

How could I forget? Mine is the loudest

[about-the-chaos]

There is this joke that goes...

But I just forgot how it goes

It goes

It went

Will it?

Things seem heavy

Let us laugh, hahaha

[about-the-chaos]

we hug ourselves

we take long showers

we watch our dreams die

And our familes fall apart

when asked we reply

We are fine

We are fine

We are fine

We are fine

I'm fine

I'm fine

I'm fine

I'm fine

What is "fine"?

[about-the-chaos]

(trigger warning)

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On Christmas

I killed myself

I didn't want to die

Just wanted The Pain to pass

Alone in my room

I took all the pills

Down with cognac

I passed out

Next morning I woke up

On the floor

I got up

I made lunch

"Merilly"

But since them

i've been living

as if I'm dead

Now and then

I look down

To see if worms

Already

Took over my chest

[about-the-chaos]

The clown in the circle of wonders

Clouds the thunders of Hunters

Around with laughters and flutters

Juggling with bundles of blunders

[about-the-chaos]

"getting it off my chest"/desabafo

Little Sis

I was a child

when you were a baby

Still I raised you

Nights awake

Pacing the hallway

First steps

First words

Change of diapers

First school

First crush

First dance

With all the care

With all my heart

I gave you my All

Now... barelly a teen

I can't recognise you

Your partying

Your drinking

Your smoking

Sleeping around

Show me all the ways

That i can go insane

I was a child

when you were a baby

Still I raised you

I'm sorry

It wasn't enough

------

I love you

And it destroys me

[about-the-chaos]

If my hands could reach you

And your arms could hold me

How delightful would that be?

I look for your soul

But to no avail

I can never find you

Soulmate of mine

Where are you?

Do you also hurt without me?

[about-the-chaos]

There was a Dove

A white Dove

So Long Ago

Where did it go?

The flames burned in amber

The amber is gone

Look at the time

Where did it go?

The doors were wide

But it shrunk in size

The warmth of the water

Where did it go?

Where do I go?

Tell me where to go

To go where good things go

When they are gone

[about-the-chaos]

Your Borderline

Cross lines

That shouldn't be crossed

Now I'm across lines

In a monitor

Your Heartbeat

Is beating me

[about-the-chaos]

I watch couples interacting

In trains and buses

As if watching a silly romcom

Alien creatures

Smelling like youth

Loves... Friendships...

Their Hapiness

Almost indecent

So curious...

Is it real?

[about-the-chaos]

If people are like houses

I'm a closed off empty shack

No lights

Bent

Barely functional

But (surprisingly) always there

Despite rain and wind

[about-the-chaos]

While lightening up the brightness

In face and smiles

For reasons

Quite reasonable known

I see the infinite darkness

The infinite darkness

See right through me

Its Beast in my heels

I pour down page after page

Its likeliness

That i can talk to none

To none

To none

The usual loneliness

Such a beat up concept,

Songs are for hapiness

What poetry is for sadness

[about-the-chaos]

Once i dreamed my body was sinking

Beneath the song of blue waves

Far down below

My body as heavy as rock

As motionless as lifeless doll

It sunk to the bottom

And i looked up to

Ocean blue color

Permeated by light

Fishes of all colors and sizes

Gently passed me by

Lungs easily breathing the air

Denied by land

And soft warm waves

Danced in my skin

And time had no meaning

Timeless and peaceful

This beautiful

Beautiful

Happy blue place