DPD Account

I have DPD with HPD traits and never see accounts for DPD so I’m making one. I’m 26 and taken. Don’t flirt with me or I’ll block you.

[actuallydependentpd]

i don’t talk about my beliefs on this account because it’s supposed to focus on my dpd but i want to make this very clear

I don’t fuck with ICE

I dont like the orange or the people that support him

I believe in therapy, medication, and recovery and think feeding into delusions is harmful and malicious

Don’t follow me if you don’t think LGBTQIA people should have rights

Don’t follow me if you think a person can be illegal

Don’t follow me if you’re racist

I’m pro union

I believe in global warming

I hate billionaires

Religion shouldn’t be involved in government, especially a government that says we have freedom of religion

I hate pedos (if you have POCD or intrusive thoughts i’m not talking about you I’m referring to people that hurt children and use cp not people with unwanted repetitive thoughts)

ASD is not caused by vaccines and Autism Speaks is a hate group

I support Palestine and Congo

Disabled adults should be treated as adults and deserve rights

Trans people are people and deserve rights and to be able to choose what to do with their own bodies

AI art isnt art. I support analytical AI that improves medical care and research but not generative AI

None of this should be controversial but if you disagree leave. If you comment to argue I won’t engage. I’ll just block you. Human rights and equity should not be up for debate and you thinking that they are tell me all I need to know about you.

[actuallydependentpd]

my family really trained me not to trust my own decisions. they taught me that whatever I picked was wrong. that they know the correct answer and there are no guidelines to what the correct answer is so I just have to figure out what they want and go along with it.

[actuallydependentpd]

i feel like I have to shove myself into a box to make sure I'm not taking up too much space but the box is smaller than me.

[actuallydependentpd]

do y'all also feel like you don't need to speak to anyone else if your DP is with you? because I'm 100% content alone as long as I get time with my DP. even if I see no one else for months at a time

[actuallydependentpd]

btw y'all my asks are always open. I'm a behavioral science major and am currently in therapy for my DPD. i believe in a psychosocialcultural model but primarily focus on the cognitive behavioral model while incorporating the other models as needed. I'm not a therapist and can't give medical advice but I do have a lot of information

[actuallydependentpd]

a method I've been using to get myself more used to making decisions is when I have to pick something I try to pick three things, sometimes more or less depending on what's being picked. then I ask another person to pick from the three. if another person isn't available I put it into an online wheel and spin it. if I'm disappointed in the choice I remove it and spin again.

[actuallydependentpd]

i might start posting coping mechanisms as I learn them. not every coping mechanism will help everyone. it one I post doesn't do anything for you that's okay. try a different one. but I'm going to keep this up while I continue to try and get better. most are going to be grounding techniques and anxiety coping mechanisms as DPD is a anxiety based personality disorder. these should help more than just DPD, it should help others with cluster C disorders, anxiety disorders, or panic disorders

[actuallydependentpd]

y'all should try laying for a while with ice under your neck and feet and if you're up to it hold some in your hands. put on some relaxing music. smell something nice. look at something that makes you happy. it's so good. it's helping me ground my anxiety and stress. it sounds stupid but it helps

[actuallydependentpd]

I've been working to identify my irrational assumptions about reality and replace them with more reasonable trains of thought by actively correcting myself in my mind every time I notice it happen the last few days and so far it's provided some relief for my anxiety. examples are

"I'm incompetent." -> "I can learn how this works"

"No one wants to be around me." -> "if they didn't want to have me around they'd stop asking to have me here."

"Any choice I make is going to be wrong" -> "there literally is no wrong choice in this situation, just do what makes you happy"

it sounds silly and obvious but honestly this on top of a grounding technique my therapist taught me have made me feel a lot more regulated the last two days. I'll update if it continues to improve

[actuallydependentpd]

i have three days until my next psych appointment to review my medication. my anxiety meds stopped working and I'm not doing well tbh. I'm hoping whatever we do next will help. it was so good when I started but I gained a tolerance for it

[actuallydependentpd]

i wish my anxiety would go away. i wish I didn't always feel like any choice I make will be the wrong one. i just want to be able to live with confidence. i want to be normal and healthy

[actuallydependentpd]

I'm always so worried about abandonment that I stress out the people around me. i want to stop but I don't know how. i know logically there's no reason for me to be anxious like this but I can't stop

[actuallydependentpd]

i need to work through my anxiety. i feel like im trying to address it and every time more just pops up. it's like im made out of it and theres nothing else sometimes

[tlirsgender]

Having your main anxiety response be Avoidance is crazy cause you'll think you're chillin and then one day you're like waitttt I've been paralyzed with fear this whole time. Damn

[tlirsgender]

Was anybody else playing dead the whole time they were teenagers or is that just a me problem. Like I'm 20 now and I'm like Oh shit I didn't do anything. Because I'm scared

[actuallydependentpd]

I'm hopeful my new therapist will actually help me with my DPD. he says he's a PD specialist so I'm hoping he has the tools that I need. I'm just scared of having to start over again. i can't keep doing it. i liked my last therapist too but my insurance didn't like her. i go to my second session on Friday but he seems good so far

[celestial-rest]

*texts dryer* *uses my actual name* Do you hate me? Did i do something wrong?? What did i do wrong? Please dont abandon me, please i'd fix it if i knew what it was. I'll cry just dont leave

[actuallydependentpd]

i constantly feel like I need attention and to be taken care of and I feel so lonely when I'm not, but no one can do that all the time. it's unrealistic, and I know that, but I still feel like I need it