[adropofhumanity]

PLEASE unfollow me if you're a supporter of israel. please unfollow me if you're silent about palestine. please unfollow me if you're neutral. your silence regarding this genocide is more sickening than the noises of even explosives and bombs.

[adropofhumanity]

some people will use their head to misuse your heart.

[adropofhumanity]

and above all, the world of men should be grateful that women are asking for equality, not revenge

[adropofhumanity]

mera gunaah bas itna tha main dhoondhti phiri use jo chodne se milta

[adropofhumanity]

survival mode se kabh suicide mode pe aa jaati samhaj nahi aata

[adropofhumanity]

aur jo mohobbat nibha sakte the unko mohobbat mili hi nahi

[adropofhumanity]

meri love life main sabh sahi hai, bas main galat hoon

[adropofhumanity]

i was 16 when i brought him home for the first time. i was the happiest, i did not realise it back then that joys such as those were as sparsely spread in life as that. and that it would go sour soon.

we had intended to go into that store as any other day; simply to look around all the pets and come home in time for dinner.

but that day was life changing. i pleaded and pleaded and my father had been in a great mood. he thought for a few minutes. and with hesitation in his eyes, agreed dimly.

the first few weeks with him passed by quickly. the house seemed like a cake of heaven. such joy and laughter and naughtiness. the work was new, the constant eyeing was heavy on my routine, but it didn't matter with the pleasantness of his company.

then came the day; that left a bruise that healed but remained sensitive forever. he scratched at the door as usual. and we ignored as much as we could, enduring patiently. but my father wasn't in a particularly kind mood that day and in a fit of rage, he threw the door open and let him out.

i blame myself for the vagueness of my memory and for the lack of responsibility i displayed. suffice it to say, he never returned. lost in the grimness of the dark alleys and street wounds.

when i was 26, i met another one. similar to him. or rather, was it him? or so i saw.

i took him, cared carefully, hurt and insecure by my previous errors but hopeful to repeat them. days passed into weeks and weeks into months. he was perfectly lovely, very lazy and dismissive in his attitude towards me. he was a typical.

i spoilt him rotten. my father would throw one of his famous rages around every so often, only this time, i would to. and he never behaved quite in the same way again. it was a little battle i had, after many long battles, won.

then one day, he didn't eat. he didn't drink. he didn't move much and remained low. my heart dropped in my stomach and i rushed him to the doctor.

of course, he was sick. he was the kind of sick that didn't translate into peaceful return. i felt that jab in my chest, but proceeded with his treatment anyway. faith moved mountains, so what of illnesses?

he worsened. probably not more than i had. hours passed into days until one day, he did fall the kind of sick that from which i knew there was no better place than death.

i was 26. but i trembled like a 6 year old and could not watch his eyes anymore. i couldn't bear to hold him. i was terrified, watching.

he took his last in a hospital, far away from me, where he was left to be buried.

he never came home again. and i was not with him, like a coward, that i was.

it is exactly 9 years and 2 years respectively today. everytime i am reminded of them, i am more reminded of my cowardice. what love requires is courage and i am not sure if i ever can have it. a part of me was buried with him, and maybe, that's all i can afford to give of love.

[adropofhumanity]

sometimes you wonder, why is it everyone gets along with everyone except you? you're a good person, a kind one. not neccesarily nice but a gentle, graceful, loving person nevertheless. the kind of person people would be generally happy to hang around with in sadness and in joy alike. and perhaps it's a test. and a blessing, both. it's a bit like a rock that rests on your chest but oh well, what can one complain of. it is what it is.

[mashriqiyyah]

9500 Palestinians held prisoners by the Israeli terrorist force. 9500 Palestinians given a death sentence altogether for crimes they didn't commit. The heart bleeds and rages.

May Allah release them all with safety and honour, reunite them with their families and grant them a victory that stuns the whole world. And if Allah has written death for them in the hands of the oppressors, May Allah count them among the martyrs, make their death swift and painless for them, save them from the anxiety of death and punish their oppressors with an adhaab that engulfs the Zaalimeen in raging fire and boils their intestines in both the worlds.Aameen.

[adropofhumanity]

[adropofhumanity]

[adropofhumanity]

maybe, just maybe, i am unfit for human relationships. and more surprisingly, i am unwilling to fix that.

[adropofhumanity]

i am fascinated by pen spinning. my fingers hurt but i cannot stop doing it.

[adropofhumanity]

[adropofhumanity]

[adropofhumanity]

on a mission to break the generational curse by ending the generation