my take on phainaxa, as contrary to how ive seen majority of the fandom interpret them.
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my take on phainaxa, as contrary to how ive seen majority of the fandom interpret them.
the ultimate price of anaxa's achievements is to be forgotten. in this essay late-night ramble i will
every one of anaxa's character stories ends with an indication that said story will be forgotten. for his first story, he snaps out of a flashback. his second (an experiment log) mentions that the original has already been destroyed. the third is an improvised speech -- never recorded, never practiced -- and the fourth story literally states that it is "One of the echoes in Anaxa's memories after the Grove had fallen, which vanished because nobody discovered it".
over and over again they tell us that there will be no record of his achievements, nobody to remember him when he's dead. and the heartbreaking part is that anaxa can come to terms with sacrificing his body, but he can't come to terms with sacrificing his memories. because anaxa desperately wants to be remembered. in as i've written, it's mentioned that he's able to laugh off his failures because his achievements will grant him a legacy that lasts for generations. and look at his experiment logs -- how organized they are, how diligently he must keep them, all so that his efforts are preserved. and, of course, why else would he insist on being called anaxagoras? to shorten a name is to forget something, and he can never risk that. because memories are all he has; having lost his family and sacrificed his physical form, what else is there?
but the thing is, anaxa has to be forgotten to succeed. in his last character story, he says this:
Yet, I have not lost enough… In comparison to what I pursue, I have not lost enough to fulfill the law of equivalent exchange.
so he knows he still has to lose something else. and later in the same story:
My future students, if you see these words, it proves that my endeavor has failed at the final step.
"if you see these words, I have failed." and in the context of his destroyed experimental logs, his interrupted flashback, his improvised speeches, we understand that the final price anaxa must pay is his legacy. the law of equivalent exchange is claiming the one thing he has worked towards all this time.
anaxa knows he's arrogant. but i'd like to think it's a desperate, tragic sort of arrogance, like the flare of a fire as it finds its last piece of kindling. please look at me. please remember me before it's too late.
Anaxa, How the Self Transcends the Divine
An Anaxa analysis in relation to Nietzsche (cross posted from tiktok ; @aeternior)
(More of a summarized version of as much of a summary I can make out of somewhat surface level research and 1k+ wordcount ; I am not a Nietzsche Scholar, so apologies to any out there for any amateur misinterpretations or understanding.)
Anaxa & Nietzsche
When fans talk about Anaxa but they don't talk about how he much he believes. They don't mention how much faith he has in humanity, how much passion and love he suffers for that very faith he puts into his truth.
For a man that personifies Nietzsche— What truth is more true to him than one he suffers for? What love is more powerful than one he fights for?
As a heretic with no faith in the Titans, he holds the most faith out any of their believers
anaxa makes me tear up sometimes. he loves. he loves SO MUCH to the point of creation. to commit so many sacrifices and maximize his entire utility up until the end, it's as ruthless as it was priceless like love is.
maybe that's why cerces kept reminding him of "how wonderful it is to be alive." what must it look like to cerces to see this foolish child of humanity with ambitions that threatened to smother the already dying embers of life, who reminded her so much of mnestia? the titan that offered her rawest beating heart suffused with the memories and imprints of love born from humans upon cerces' tree, in hopes that she can see the depths of just how much mnestia loves her in all her entirety?
he's so full love. if not. the reason why creation ever existed at all. maybe cerces brought him back to life not just for his ideals, but because mnestia would have also done the same, to snatch him back from the jaws of death. an act of defiance, born from the purest of love.
for someone that claimed to have lost everything, he had so much love left to give
I have never been on the same page as fandom’s clear communication fetishists and I never will be. I love miscommunication, concealment, pigheadedness, and lies. I think characters should talk around what they have to say and ignore each other and impute needs and beliefs onto others that have nothing to do with those other people and everything to do with maintenance of the ego. A little clear communication is fine but it should come at the end and be earned by repeated instances of snobbery, tomfoolery, self righteousness, or blockheadedness. If you decide you hate a character just because that character isn’t communicating in the way a therapist might coach them to, well consider that people don’t actually talk like that at all and that most of us get things wrong many times before we inch our way out of the labyrinthine darkness of our own heads.
Small Aventio Excerpts (forever abandoned)
i hate them i hate them i hate them get them away
I just started grad school this fall after a few years away from school and man I did not realize how dire the AI/LLM situation is in universities now. In the past few weeks:
I chatted with a classmate about how it was going to be a tight timeline on a project for a programming class. He responded "Yeah, at least if we run short on time, we can just ask chatGPT to finish it for us"
One of my professors pulled up chatGPT on the screen to show us how it can sometimes do our homework problems for us and showed how she thanks it after asking it questions "in case it takes over some day."
I asked one of my TAs in a math class to explain how a piece of code he had written worked in an assignment. He looked at it for about 15 seconds then went "I don't know, ask chatGPT"
A student in my math group insisted he was right on an answer to a problem. When I asked where he got that info, he sent me a screenshot of Google gemini giving just blatantly wrong info. He still insisted he was right when I pointed this out and refused to click into any of the actual web pages.
A different student in my math class told me he pays $20 per month for the "computational" version of chatGPT, which he uses for all of his classes and PhD research. The computational version is worth it, he says, because it is wrong "less often". He uses chatGPT for all his homework and can't figure out why he's struggling on exams.
There's a lot more, but it's really making me feel crazy. Even if it was right 100% of the time, why are you paying thousands of dollars to go to school and learn if you're just going to plug everything into a computer whenever you're asked to think??
That last question is what drives me insane. You are paying that money to learn. Using ChatGPT prevents you from learning. By using it you are essentially setting your tuition money on fire.
You might not grasp that because you think that the important thing about going to college is to get the credential so you can get hired and make more money. OK. You have a credential but you don't have the skills it's supposed to stand for. At some point, you will need the actual skills; and you will not have them. Then what?
Also: the tech industry is not benevolent. If you become dependent on AI to do your thinking for you then whoever designs the AI gets to determine what you can and can't think. You really trust big tech to do that? You want to be in a position where you can only write what AI will enable you to write, and only think what AI will enable you to think? You think that's going to be good for your career or your life or your fucking...soul?
No. 35
HSR Amphoreus Analysis/Theory — Possible Historical Parallels/References?
First post ig but I've literally been geeking out sm abt this, but keep in mind I've only done about surface-level research and digging so don't expect much, and this is mostly a rant so feel free to point things out.
I used sculptures as a reference