So. On today of all days, I was just informed I'm going to need surgery this summer. I have uterine fibroids that have caused abnormally heavy bleeding and extreme pain for the last two years. I'm anemic. I've had to cancel a class in the middle of teaching it because I was bleeding so heavily that my jeans were soaked to the knee. I've gone to urgent care twice. I probably should have gone to the ER in January, but I was reluctant to go, because at every turn, I have been met with disbelief and suspicion by health care providers. I have been told my bleeding is within the "normal range," even though I know it is not. I have been asked if I could be pregnant and miscarrying, repeatedly, and then been forced to take a blood test even when I assured them, repeatedly, that I could not. I have been accused of exaggerating, and told there was nothing that could be done for me. I have also been reprimanded for not seeking emergent care by the same office that told me I didn't need to seek emergent care for "normal bleeding." I say all this because our health care system is broken, in so many ways. Women, queer, gender non conforming, and people of color are treated like we are irrational and ignorant, or like we are liars. I've had other gynecological problems my entire life, and am consistently greeted by doctors--even gynecologists--who tell me there's nothing they can do for me, that this is "normal" for young women, that I just have to wait it out. The real truth is that there is too little research being done on conditions that only affect people with uteruses and ovaries. The real truth is doctors think women and black people have higher pain tolerances than "normal" people. The real truth is that POC die younger than white people in the U.S., for a multitude of reasons, but one of them is the lack of care accessible to them and the lack of empathy and belief extended to them once they do get care. The real truth is that being anything other than a cis white male means being, not having, a pre existing condition. Anyway, I'm lucky I have health care in a state that's unlikely to take up #killcare waivers. I'm lucky to have parents who I can ask for financial help if I need more surgeries. I'm lucky to work in a profession that is sustained entirely by large institutions that are legally mandated to provide health care. It is beyond infuriating--it is absurd, unthinkable--that we live in a nation where people have to count "will probably not have to choose between seeking treatment and eating" as something that makes them "lucky." In sum, fuck the GOP.













