Misplaced Lens Cap
ellievsbear
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ojovivo
NASA
pixel skylines
Kiana Khansmith
h
Monterey Bay Aquarium
Show & Tell
#extradirty
Discoholic 🪩
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hello vonnie
roma★
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sheepfilms
noise dept.
Keni
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@aisscube-blog
so… you know how in like 90% of zombie fiction it’s bites that kill you and make you a zombie, right?
okay so
i want you to get anything denim from your house and just fucking bite it. bite it as hard as you can
chances are you can’t bite through the denim very well
so, here’s what i’m thinking:
zombie apocalypse?
all-denim outfit.
the anti-zombie juniform
even in a zombie apocalypse you’re not catching me wearing a double denim
The true apocalypse would be those fashion choices.
A cleric who is the Team Mom and only heals by kissing you on the forehead and buffs you by licking her thumb and rubbing away some schmutz on your face
someone’s like “you know that’s not actually required for your job” and she’s like “shhhhh my beautiful child, my healing my rules, I made you a potion, it’s chicken noodle mana”
Their holy sigil is a macaroni necklace you made in second grade. You didn’t know them in second grade. You’re not sure how they got that macaroni necklace. You ask them about it, and they just slip you a twenty and tell you to get whatever you want at the food court. “What is a food court?” you cry, but it doesn’t matter because they summoned a hero’s feast and everything tastes wonderful, and at some point you crawl into their lap to cry about something you thought you were adult enough to handle.
“This is you handling it,” they say. “You’re never too big to ask your mom for help.”
“You’re literally not my mother,” you sob.
“But metaphorically,” they say, and you’re like truuuuuuuuuu and sob a little more before they tuck you into a bedroll because you’ve got a big day tomorrow stopping an assassination at a royal palace
asexual tension
I’m ace and I’m just always tense
time for pumpkin spiced keyblade
why are there so many posts about asexuals being immune to sirens. people. sirens don’t lure you in with sex (necessarily). they sing about whatever it is that you want most. they could sing about mothman or cinnamon toast crunch and guess what then your asexual pirate is fucking dead
this is the only kind of ace discourse i ever want to see on my dash. the only kind. ever again. good job
Do you think the sirens would be grateful that they finally get some variety?
“Oh my god we can finally just sing about pasta thank the fucking gods.”
I’m not asexual but I’m fairly certain sirens would do a far better job luring me into the depths with a song about pasta rather than sex…
I mean.
“WHAT THE FUCK STAY AWAY FROM THE ROCKS.”
“FUCKER THEY SAID THEY HAVE FETTUCCINE CARBONARA AND HOT GARLIC BREAD OVER THERE HANG ON BITCH.”
This is true; Odysseus heard them promising him knowledge of the future. So the next time you see artwork like this:
Remember those sultry naked chicks are saying “We’ll tell you the winning lotto numbers.”
Them: “We have unlimited wifi at incredible speeds~” Me: *diving headfirst into the water*
I love this post
@ikkke95
@projectdestati
I HATE THIS
Harry Potter and the Secret History
@dukeofbookingham Harry Potter and the If We Were Villains!
Harry Potter and the Hyperbole and a Half
^sounds like a must-read
Harry Potter and the Plantagenets
Harry Potter and the Chemistry: Structure and Properties Solutions Manual
Dear Christ I’m in heck
Harry Potter and the Players Handbook
past tense of william shakespeare? william shookspeare
Wouldiwas Shookspeared
delete this
Why is LARP so much more taboo than historical reenactment why is pretending you’re a wizard less socially acceptable than pretending you’re a confederate
This…is…a decent question.
I agree. I’d much rather have wizards running around than confederates…
David: *plays a secret chord* The Lord: nice! You: meh
It: *goes like this* 4th & 5th: *exists consecutively* Fall: minor Lift: major King: *baffled but composing* Hallelujah
She: *ties you to a kitchen chair* *breaks your throne* *cuts your hair* Hallelujah: *is cold and broken*
A 1 carrot ring
Blocked
you are my home, and i’m homesick.
I really love the idea of Aqua being an iceskater and Riku being a ballet dancer.
The idea of Aqua,of course,came from her spellweaver animation. The idea of Riku came from KH1 concept art that was pointed out by kingdomheartsnyctophiliac
danganronpa sprite artist: hey what do you do with your hands when you’re happy
random employee: (trying desperately to open a jar of pickles) what did you say
danganronpa sprite artist: ok got it
THE SAGA CONTINUES
(Source: https://twitter.com/mwi1me/status/921971908433780736)
twitter user Yamahamu is a fucking hero
