Alexis Lancaster

@alexis-lancaster

118 posts

alexis-lancaster

It is a heady thing to be told so earnestly that one is wanted in such a manner; and Alexis is by no means strong enough to ignore the siren's call that is Theo pleading to him.

It's a bad idea; such a bad idea. He knew the second the idea had popped his head. Summer with her, in the sun and alone. This was always going to happen, one way or another. Either she would break or he would and they would crash together. On some level he was just as desperate as she was to have it happen, to let it happen regardless of what happened next. Even if it was his own sister catching them in the act -it was only fear for her sake that he managed any sort of control.

-but she had said please so sweetly and that control turned to ash.

"Just...Just tonight." He attempts, seeking her face to rest in his hands as he kisses her. Chaste and quick, a soft little peck because he can't help himself. Already falling to bits to be kind to her in a way he is not sure he is capable of...but he wants to try. "It will be different at Hogwarts. Less damning if we both disappear...but here, tonight. Just tonight we can get away with it all."

"Tonight is good," she agrees without hesitation before kissing him again, letting herself fully close the distance between them. Tonight is all she needs and then she can wait until Hogwarts. Mads shouldn't be back until late anyway, if not until tomorrow, so tonight is perfect. Though in the kitchen may be a bad idea. "Your room or mine?" Theo questions as her hand roams up his arm and into his hair, kissing him before he can answer because she needs another taste.

alexis-lancaster

"Mine." He sighs between her kiss. Heat is quickly melting his finer motor skills. Alexis sinks into her, into the kiss like she's the sun and he is a helpless moth. Utterly drunk and only half aware of what is coming out of his mouth. "My room." He tries to correct, but his hands are cupping her arse in a way that is far too possessive.

"I am though." Theo admits quietly as her grip on him tightens. "We should now." Despite saying it she doesn't find it in herself to pull away, instead closing in for another hungry kiss.

alexis-lancaster

He wants to correct her, lips open to do just that -because being his, that is too much, too good for the likes of a clumsy fool like himself. Everything he's ever sought to own has only ever falling apart, anything he's tried to keep tends to slip between his fingers. He's not good at being steadfast or honorable, he doesn't know how to be careful and safe. He only knows how to want, trip and break. To clutch her closer when he shouldn't. Lifting her into his grip, simply because he can and likes the way her weight feels in his hand. How it keeps her just at the right height.

It is an awkward route to his quarters, he gets too distracted by the taste of her. The softness of her thighs around him. More than once he simply gives up and perches her onto an end table or against a wall to delve deeper.

Eventually, finding no good purchase to properly rock against her, he pulls his face away and gets a firmer idea on the distance between them and his bed. Thankfully they are near.

"Gods, remind me to pick a closer room tomorrow." He mumbles against her throat as he hauls her down the hallway and into his room. Kicking the door firmly shut with his boot heel.

alexis-lancaster

It is a heady thing to be told so earnestly that one is wanted in such a manner; and Alexis is by no means strong enough to ignore the siren's call that is Theo pleading to him.

It's a bad idea; such a bad idea. He knew the second the idea had popped his head. Summer with her, in the sun and alone. This was always going to happen, one way or another. Either she would break or he would and they would crash together. On some level he was just as desperate as she was to have it happen, to let it happen regardless of what happened next. Even if it was his own sister catching them in the act -it was only fear for her sake that he managed any sort of control.

-but she had said please so sweetly and that control turned to ash.

"Just...Just tonight." He attempts, seeking her face to rest in his hands as he kisses her. Chaste and quick, a soft little peck because he can't help himself. Already falling to bits to be kind to her in a way he is not sure he is capable of...but he wants to try. "It will be different at Hogwarts. Less damning if we both disappear...but here, tonight. Just tonight we can get away with it all."

"Tonight is good," she agrees without hesitation before kissing him again, letting herself fully close the distance between them. Tonight is all she needs and then she can wait until Hogwarts. Mads shouldn't be back until late anyway, if not until tomorrow, so tonight is perfect. Though in the kitchen may be a bad idea. "Your room or mine?" Theo questions as her hand roams up his arm and into his hair, kissing him before he can answer because she needs another taste.

alexis-lancaster

"Mine." He sighs between her kiss. Heat is quickly melting his finer motor skills. Alexis sinks into her, into the kiss like she's the sun and he is a helpless moth. Utterly drunk and only half aware of what is coming out of his mouth. "My room." He tries to correct, but his hands are cupping her arse in a way that is far too possessive.

alexis-lancaster

He wants to reach out and touch her, just her hand or something...anything to comfort her but his hand twitches away. He doesn't know what is allowed and what isn't. What will be accepted.

"I am not..." Alexis sighs, trying to sort his words. "I am not good at being careful when it matters. I don't mean to be careless...but well, I'll be the first to admit sometimes I act first and deal with the consequences later. There are also very few people in my life whose opinions I care to listen to. My mother is one. My sister, for all that we bully each other, is another. I can not deny the idea of wanting you the same as I can't deny that if not handled carefully it will throw both of our lives into a void -and it is very hard for me to walk the line of wanting you and wanting your happiness. You are not something I can be casual about. I care about you Theo. You are not some random girl I can tease and play but ultimately move on from because you are also precious to my sister, to me and probably even my mother at this point. Of course I want you to be selfish, gods knows I've been waiting for the day, but I am a terrible thing to be selfish for."

"You're not though." Theo takes a careful step closer and reaches out for him, her hand landing gently on his arm. "You make me feel safe, Alexis. And several other things that are...less appropriate to say out loud. I know that this isn't simple, that it's delicate and we can't just- But I can't think about it all right now. I've spent so long wanting you and now that I've said it out loud I can't just bottle it back up." Her heart beat feels achingly loud in her ears as she comes in a little closer. "Let me just be selfish tonight. Please."

alexis-lancaster

It is a heady thing to be told so earnestly that one is wanted in such a manner; and Alexis is by no means strong enough to ignore the siren's call that is Theo pleading to him.

It's a bad idea; such a bad idea. He knew the second the idea had popped his head. Summer with her, in the sun and alone. This was always going to happen, one way or another. Either she would break or he would and they would crash together. On some level he was just as desperate as she was to have it happen, to let it happen regardless of what happened next. Even if it was his own sister catching them in the act -it was only fear for her sake that he managed any sort of control.

-but she had said please so sweetly and that control turned to ash.

"Just...Just tonight." He attempts, seeking her face to rest in his hands as he kisses her. Chaste and quick, a soft little peck because he can't help himself. Already falling to bits to be kind to her in a way he is not sure he is capable of...but he wants to try. "It will be different at Hogwarts. Less damning if we both disappear...but here, tonight. Just tonight we can get away with it all."

#chat theo #narrator: and he was a liar who lied

"No, I don't know it, I don't really know what's happening at all." Theo admits softly. "What I know is that I want you. And I haven't ever wanted anyone, not really. Because my focus has always been to make myself small. Make as little noise possible. Be unseen and dutiful. There is no room for want or selfishness in that and- and for the first time in my life I really want to be selfish. But I don't know what you want so I just kept trying to leave to door open and see if you'd even look through it. When you didn't I really did just assume you didn't see me that way. So this conversation now... well it's a little fucking jarring to be honest."

alexis-lancaster

He wants to reach out and touch her, just her hand or something...anything to comfort her but his hand twitches away. He doesn't know what is allowed and what isn't. What will be accepted.

"I am not..." Alexis sighs, trying to sort his words. "I am not good at being careful when it matters. I don't mean to be careless...but well, I'll be the first to admit sometimes I act first and deal with the consequences later. There are also very few people in my life whose opinions I care to listen to. My mother is one. My sister, for all that we bully each other, is another. I can not deny the idea of wanting you the same as I can't deny that if not handled carefully it will throw both of our lives into a void -and it is very hard for me to walk the line of wanting you and wanting your happiness. You are not something I can be casual about. I care about you Theo. You are not some random girl I can tease and play but ultimately move on from because you are also precious to my sister, to me and probably even my mother at this point. Of course I want you to be selfish, gods knows I've been waiting for the day, but I am a terrible thing to be selfish for."

"Maybe he's weighed his options and chosen, smartly, that the risk isn't worth the possible reward," she counters with a shrug of her shoulders.

alexis-lancaster

A sharp blade of anger cuts along his heart; his patience snaps. A cord that he swears he can hear.

"Theo. That isn't what is happening and you know it. " He admits, knocking his frame against the kitchen island to lean against it as he speaks. "There are other factors. Outside ones, that could be very angry and hurt if we are reckless. Do you want to ignore them? I can if you can, but that doesn't make them go away."

Theo takes her time chewing, swallowing slowly as she debates just leaving the room. Which would look more suspicious. And also likely wouldn't get him to let it go anyway. "It doesn't matter to him. He's had all the opportunity in the world and never made even the whisper of a move. So I've taken the hint."

alexis-lancaster

Alexis feels his blood pump too quickly, there is a rising amount of dread in his gut -it fuels the fear he was feeling earlier, turns it into a storm. He is absolutely out of his depth and that is becoming painfully obvious.

"Maybe it matters too much to be careless."

alexis-lancaster

Alexis waits patiently (two whole seconds) before pushing, "Care to expand on that?"

"Not particularly, no. It doesn't really matter anyway," she tries to laugh it off casually before biting down on another cookie as an excuse not to speak further on the subject."

alexis-lancaster

Alexis frowns, unsure how to take her words. Theo was...good at side-stepping honest conversations. As was his sister, it was a dance for her to get to the heart of matters, but Alexis was different. He disliked the nature of pretending; perhaps most of all he disliked it when it was watching someone hide their pain, and he saw that too often in Theo.

"Doesn't matter to you or to him?"

alexis-lancaster

The world spins a little faster and Alexis has to force the bite of cookie down his suddenly dry throat. "...oh?" He wonders out loud before he can stop himself. He does his best to play it off as casual in tone but it's a pretty weak defense.

"Yep." Theo doesn't offer further explanation. What would be the point? It would just make their summer awkward if he has to give the just friends talk. Or- and it's the thing she's really afraid of, he may actually feel the same. And if he does, maybe he's decided she's not worth the trouble. Which would be entirely fair all things considered. It's easier to believe he just doesn't feel the same.

alexis-lancaster

Alexis waits patiently (two whole seconds) before pushing, "Care to expand on that?"

"First of all, rude." She frowns at the stolen cookie before grabbing another from the box. "And no, there won't be. As it turns out, I am in fact a fool, and lovely as it all was, my mind is on someone else. It wouldn't be fair to entertain it any further."

alexis-lancaster

The world spins a little faster and Alexis has to force the bite of cookie down his suddenly dry throat. "...oh?" He wonders out loud before he can stop himself. He does his best to play it off as casual in tone but it's a pretty weak defense.

Theo snorts and finishes another cookie before responding. "Yes, he was the perfect gentleman. Charming, handsome, kind, door opening. Anyone would be a fool not to want him."

alexis-lancaster

Her words sting but Alexis refuses to flinch. Reminding himself that all of those things could be true and still not matter. He does however childishly snatch a cookie from her hands. "So there will be a second date?"

alexis-lancaster

"I suppose." He lazily wanders up and reaches for her pilfered treats. Handing it down to her while at the same time looking her over. There's nothing to clock as illicit; no mused hair, no bruised lips or flushed cheeks. "I'm guessing Henri was a gentleman?"

"Do you really want to know?" Theo questions teasingly, taking the cookies with a pleased smile. and popping one into her mouth.

alexis-lancaster

Alexis shrugs, "No? -I can already tell by the fact you're home early. And that I know the boring fool rather well, he'll get written permission before he so much as kisses you. Still, I figured I should ask."

Theo nearly falls back in surprise, her focus so lasered in on the cookies she didn't even hear him come in. "You scared the shit out of me," she says, letting out a breath of a laugh before turning back to the treat at hand.

"It was- nice." She says carefully. Because he's not the person she wants to talk to about this. Not when she has yet to reconcile whatever one sided crush she has going on. And the date was nice. It was perfectly pleasant. The food was good and Henri was kind and all of it was lovely. But if she was forced to be honest...then she would have to admit she spent more time that she should have wondering what it would have been like if Alexis had been across from her instead. "Could you help me with these?"

alexis-lancaster

"I suppose." He lazily wanders up and reaches for her pilfered treats. Handing it down to her while at the same time looking her over. There's nothing to clock as illicit; no mused hair, no bruised lips or flushed cheeks. "I'm guessing Henri was a gentleman?"

a night to remember

Theo waves a last goodbye to Henri before turning in and shutting the door behind her with a soft smile. It was a good date. Not that she has much to compare it to, but she enjoyed herself. Truthfully, she doesn't fully know if it was the company she enjoyed, very handsome company... Or if she was still riding a high of new levels of freedom.

Normally she would be all but locked away. Stuck in a tedious loop of tutoring and rigorous training and endless chores. Instead she's skipping through a warm villa in the setting sun, her dress swishing happily against her thighs as she makes her way to the kitchen. It took about a week before she trusted that it was really okay to make herself comfortable. To feel as safe as she does now to go an find herself a little treat before she crawls back into bed.

She hums happily to herself as she rummages through a cupboard, trying to reach for a box a cookies that's just a shelf too high.

alexis-lancaster

Alexis feels the wards of the villa shimmer, alerting him that someone is home. That Theo is home from her date.

-part of him is instantly, annoyingly relieved that she is not only home relatively early in the night but also without his stupid cousin.

The rest of him is still unpacking whatever cocktail of emotion he's been drowning in since Mad's let it drop that she had organized said date. Because she is the actual devil. Because as much as he'd love to simply just announce his intentions with Theo -it is still too soon and he neither wants to deal with his mother's sly marriage offers or his sister's hexing of his cock.

So he had simply nodded and made an off hand comment about Henri being boring and then wandered off to his rooms to sulk.

There was of course a fission of jealousy; how could there not? -but Henri was for all his boring tendencies was unlikely to jump Theo or drag her into trouble. Alexis hates how it gnaws on him that, for all his annoyance, it is a safe choice. That Henri can be trusted to take Theo out and not push for anything. That he is the first person to come to Mad's mind. Then again, why would she chose someone like Alexis?

So hence the great sulk. Right up until she comes home and suddenly the gnawing turns into violent bitter bites within his gut. He wants to know what happened. Henri is boring, but maybe he can also be romantic? (Doubtful but stranger things have happened) and perhaps she is into his stupid boring conversations about honor?

"So, did you have fun?" He neutrally asks the back of Theo's head, watching her rummage around.

alexis-lancaster

Alexis laughs softly, "Yes, of course. Where would you like more, the ocean or poolside? We have a villa in Italy that's near a lovely private beach. Otherwise the main house in France has a favorite pool of mine." He's never been so grateful to be filthy rich enough to offer this to her.

"I've never swam in the ocean before, could be nice to try." Theo can't comprehend the idea of warm villas near the ocean or with beautiful pools. The money her family has is vast, but it is not used to make life joyful. It is hoarded and used as a weapon to keep everyone in line.

alexis-lancaster

"We could head there first if you'd like. Have the place to ourselves, I mean with Mad's too. Obviously." Alexis is quick to put out, his original offer sounding just a tad too...romantic. He blames the rising comfort levels.

"I...don't know..." Looking up, her eyes flit unwillingly to his lips and she nearly says she doesn't want to talk at all. Quickly she turns her face to hide her now red cheeks. "Can we go swimming this summer?" It's the first thing that pops into her head to fill the space and she cringes with how stupid it feels coming out.

alexis-lancaster

Alexis laughs softly, "Yes, of course. Where would you like more, the ocean or poolside? We have a villa in Italy that's near a lovely private beach. Otherwise the main house in France has a favorite pool of mine." He's never been so grateful to be filthy rich enough to offer this to her.

alexis-lancaster

"Sorry," Alexis notes her nervous tone and rubs at her shoulder in attempt to ease it. "I didn't mean to make it an issue. Feel free to throw me under the bus, say I bullied you into it. It's more or less the truth."

Theo leans into his touch, letting herself relax further against him. "I'll figure it out. Just not right now."

alexis-lancaster

"What would you like to talk about instead?"

"I know..." She's still nervous. Not because she thinks for a second that Mads would say no, but because she doesn't know how to explain the sudden desire. And she can lie like a champ, but she's not sure she'll be any good at lying to her best friend. She's never tried before. "I will. Soon. But I can't think about it right now."

alexis-lancaster

"Sorry," Alexis notes her nervous tone and rubs at her shoulder in attempt to ease it. "I didn't mean to make it an issue. Feel free to throw me under the bus, say I bullied you into it. It's more or less the truth."

Alexis Lancaster @alexis-lancaster - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag