Alleys Only Way

Mostly a beauty and health blog with a few extra things added in;) have fun, loves. Back up blog: alexycoleshill or Alex. Keep hoeing!

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Three-some tips + story

So here’s how my experience went: My best friend of 16 years and I were sitting outside on my porch. For this story I’ll call her Lisa.  “Hey,” she said “do you want to have a three some with Beck?” (False name). Now, this came as a surprise to me since it was out of the blue and she’s straight. Beck is this guy that we had both hooked up with before (on separate occasions) and has begged us for a three some multiple times. Me, having never slept with a girl before and being bi, jumped at the opportunity. We awkwardly awaited a half hour for Beck to drive over since he lived a while away then went to my apartment in the basement.  Lisa got anxious and said she had to go upstairs (friends with the tenants) and grab something so I got to work *pleasuring* Beck. She came back down crunching on soda crackers as I blew him and I had to rip them out of her hands and ask if she wanted to screw around or not. A little harsh, yes, but when you’re about to do the naughty and someones crunching away on food in your ear it’s kind of nerve wracking.  After a few minutes of awkwardness no thanks to her we go at it.  So, you may ask; Alley, why are you telling us this story?  Because, my lovely hoelings. We’re about to discuss.... three some tips! 

Now, if this is your first time having a three some you may want to be with someone you’re comfortable with, like a fuck buddy and close friend (if you know your relationship with them won’t be awkward after this)  and make sure to have a discussion on what you’re comfortable with beforehand. For example, the other female/male you’re with may not want you to perform oral on them or to... how do I explain this? Insert yourself into them. Heh. Awkward explanation. But having an discussion beforehand is always crucial so that you don’t cross the line.

-Use protection. Especially when with two people, one that you’re not too close with. You never know what they may have, you could also possibly catch a UTI or yeast infection. 

-See what you’re comfortable with. You’re into bondage and the others aren’t? You’re into dom/sub and one person isn’t? I keep saying you need to talk but it IS a crucial thing, ladies and gents. 

-Don’t be shy! You’re there to experiment and live out a fantasy. My friend was a total mood kill by being too nervous but Beck and I settled her down by staying calm and relaxed. I did end up telling her she didn’t have to, but if you want this then just pretend it’s in your head and do whatever pleasures you as long as the others are consenting. It’s more fun and may I add hot like that ;)

-Don’t be freaked out. There will be a lot of liquids including sweat, that’s to be expected. It’s not exactly like porn. 

-If you like something let the person know or ask them to do it. You’ll have more fun. 

-If you’re one or two girls with another girl; ALWAYS. CLIP. YOUR. GOD. DAMN. NAILS. You don’t want to tear her apart, do you? She’ll be two halves of a person when you’re done. 

-Switch positions. Make sure everyones getting attention, you don’t want anyone depressed because they feel left out. 

-If you’re a couple make sure that you won’t feel jealous and you have a strong relationship. I personally wouldn’t have a threesome in a relationship but that’s because I get jealous easy. Know your boundaries and like I said; TALK!

That’s all I can think of right now. I’ll be sure to update if I come up with a part two! Until then, happy hoeing;)

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Hoe Tips; Beauty

Okay, ladies (and gentlemen). I’m in a cosmetology class right now and there’s a few well-needed tips I would like to share with the public.  -Moisturizer works just as well as primer. Don’t go out buying expensive ass primer when you can use what you should already have at home.   -Use brown sugar and castor oil to exfoliate! It works just as well as store the store bought kind. Plus you can use essential oils and make any scent you want. -MATCH FOUNDATION TO YOUR JAW, NOT YOUR ARM!!!!! Your arms and hands are different tones than your face. When you go to a store bring a mirror and match it to your jawbone. You’ll thank me for this.  -Research your face shape. Eye, nose, etc. Contour and highlight you see on a beauty guru won’t necessarily look good on you. I’ll make another post on this.  -Always clean your brushes! Not doing so can make you break out and get back heads. 

Finally, always drink water! It’ll make your skin and lips clear, you’ll look more rested, over all it just makes everything better! Trust me. 

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Hoe tips: Vag part one

-Do no use coconut oil as lube (!!) it will erode the condom so it breaks. Plus using coconut oil in your vag too many times can give you an yeast infection.

-Don’t use two condoms at once (some escorts do this with especially gross men without realizing it ups the chances of the condom breaking)

-Always. Pee. After. Sex. You’ll thank me for this.

-Berries, pineapple, strawberries, watermelon, grapefruit, mangos and yogurt will help you taste better as well as water so eat and drink tons of that good shit.

-Exfoliate before and after you shave.

-Aloe Vera helps relieve razor burn.

-If you have ingrown hair try tweezing it. I do it all the time.

-Use tea tree oil daily.

-Don’t wash your vagina with soap (unless it’s the kind specifically meant for it) because it’ll cause a yeast infection. Use a soft cloth and wipe the entire area (or babywipes)

-I once had a horrible yeast infection in my cosmetogloy class so I talked to my teacher. We put Witch Hazel essential oil on a pad and it relieved the itching and burning straight away! Drinking lots of cranberry juice helps detox the yeast infection and relieve it as well. (If you try these tips don’t do just this. Get the treatment as well! I find the one day treatment works best) Coconut Oil will also help the outside temporarily but only use it in case of emergency. It can make the infection worst if you keep using it.

-Hair removal creams will cause a yeast infection.

-DO NOT USE DOUCHES

-shave your puss sideways.