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Love Yourself (even if sometimes others have to do it for you)

It’s not a good thing to try and force someone not to use a healthy coping mechanism. There’s nothing inherently wrong with self-deprecation.

fernacular

There is, there very much is.

Self-deprecation isn’t a healthy coping mechanism. Coping mechanism? Yes. Healthy? Absolutely not. Saying bad things about yourself seems harmless or even good in the moment but if you do it enough you will reinforce negative beliefs about yourself and the world around you. Say “I’m the worst” enough times and you will believe you’re the worst. Say “everything sucks I should just die lol” enough times and you will come to believe that too.

I’m not pulling this shit out of my ass either, by the way, this is coming direct from when i was an outpatient at a psychiatric hospital, way back when i did this EXACT THING CONSTANTLY and ended up suicidal. This is what I was taught there, and this is how I dragged myself out.

The best way to combat this (very unhealthy) coping mechanism is really just to force yourself to say good things about yourself, and shut down the bad ones. It feels stupid, it feels like you’re lying, it feels like it will never work. But over time, if you keep at it, and with the help of friends, the new words will replace the old ones. If you replace “i’m terrible” with “I’ve made a mistake, but that doesn’t make me a bad person” that is what you will come to believe, and make it 1000% easier to actually fix the problem because you won’t be bogged down with self-hatred.

It’s annoying, and aggravating, and you don’t want to do it because self-deprecation is how you’ve coped for so long, but I promise you it’s not healthy and will make everything worse in the long term.

plot-twost

I am gonna start sending this to myself and my friends once a week as a reminder that *this shit matters*

juicesocks

Keep reading

spw-foundation

painfully-unoriginal

if u haven’t read this fic by @wakkoswish u dont kno whats good

fablivious1

Doodle dump 0.1

fablivious1

Welcome to The Willoughbys but my-style-changes-in-every-panel-and-also-wtf-this-took-so-long

fablivious1

Another normal day...

themetallicnemesis

silly-slacker-person

All this time later, it still bothers me how Tim was treated by the story

sketchydetails17

I really liked the yarn-haired movie about found family :’)

deal-right

I love him so much ahdnfkgk

hewwocopter

Did someone say Monkie Kid vines?

mueritos

hiya! I figured id make an informational post about the little things ive noticed about being on testosterone that I found weren’t talked about a lot when I was starting my transition and even before when I was doing my research. I think that trans sexual health is an extremely important part of trans peoples lives (and that doesnt necessarily mean sex) seeing as the physical changes that happen during transition are often foreign to us. Sexual health keeps us healthy and comfortable in our bodies, so do your best to stay attentive to your body’s changes! As always, consult your doctor if you feel the need to. These are only tips ive learned from transitioning myself and from my doctor when I asked about certain things.

PATREON

frompawntoqueen

Fucking tumblr our here really trying to teach the world things

maggot-withanf

Hey this isn’t necessarily something for HRT. But rather for top surgery for those considering it, most every surgeon and endocrinologist I’ve met (save for the ones I’m working with currently) doesn’t mention this and trans dudes who have gone through top surgery sometimes don’t even know about it, but your ti🅱️🅱️ies? They make hormones. Lots of them. When you get top surgery you’re removing a primary maker of hormones from your body and it’ll throw you through a loop, and for anywhere from a few days to a couple months after the surgery your hormones are gonna be WACK. This will usually cause a post-surgery depression that a lot of trans men sometimes confuse with regret for taking this step in their transition and it’ll throw them into an identity crisis, so for those planning on taking that step, just remember that weird ass sadness you’re gonna feel is just your hormones being like “hey wHAT the FUCK” and you made the right decision for you!!

aevios

Can confirm that bottom growth is a real and painful thing. If you’re the kind of person who wears skinny jeans regularly (looking at u fashionable goth/punk trans ppl), here’s a tip for your first few months of T: don’t.

Bottom growth will be overly sensitive and stick out of the hood more than usual, and anytime the inside of ur jeans rubs against it it will a) hurt and b) make u horny.

This can be a problem in general, but especially if u have bottom dysphoria and being reminded of ur junk can make u dysphoric, and/or if ur ace like me and being horny can be a very confusing and annoying experience (I know this is not every aces experience but I had never really had a sex drive or arousal before T and it was very distressing at first. Still ace tho)

Oh also: microdosing can be great for slowing changes and letting ur body adapt more gradually (It can be very helpful for more gradual and natural sounding voice changes), however, it will not let you avoid certain changes entirely. Microdosing will not prevent bottom growth from happening, or any other changes you may want to avoid. Unfortunately what changes you get are genetic and there is no way to pick and chose which you get. A lower dose of T can make it go more slowly to help you get used to it more gradually or so that if there are changes you really want to avoid you can try and stop before those advance too far, but it can’t prevent changes from happening entirely, certainly not specific ones. And certainly not bottom growth, which is one of the first changes to start and one of the least reversible.

(I don’t say this because I think that was what op was trying to say abt microdosing at all btw, I’m just trying to clarify because I remember when I started T and was researching low dose T, I saw some people on online forums hoping it would allow them to avoid bottom growth for example, and it won’t, so I wanted to clear that up)

Also re: top surgery, the first time I saw my chest post-op my brain flipped and I got so dizzy I nearly passed out. This is also relatively normal and okay. I think my brain just kind of freaked out seeing my body so different from what we were used to and also oh yeah with a big scar running across it. Its okay, that doesn’t mean you regret it either. I think sometimes ur brain just needs a minute to catch up and realize ‘oh wait this isn’t a traumatic injury this is what my chest is supposed to look like’. Once I had seen my chest a few times and let my brain get used to it I was absolutely thrilled and loved it (and still do). I also had a panic attack the night before my surgery because I was afraid of the anesthesia. Again, doesnt mean I made the wrong decision.

I think a lot of trans ppl don’t know that surgery can just be an emotionally intense experience, and yeah can also mess with ur hormones a bit (another consequence of both hormonal stuff and the stress of surgery is I got really bad acne for awhile after surgery) and so you might feel all kinds of weird or stressed directly before or after. It’s okay. Make sure u have supportive ppl around u to take care of u, and wait until ur body has had a bit of time to heal and renormalize before u start panicing over if u made the right choice or not. You’ll probably be sleeping for most of the first week anyway. Give ur body and ur nerves a break for a bit.

bamfbooks

I learned so very much from this. I’ve seen posts talking about MtF transition and the hormone weirdness that causes, but this is the first FtM one I’ve seen.

jothstrap

re: sensitive bottom growth

sorry to be the one to say this out loud but transmascs google “manual foreskin restoration” and thank me later

rhinozilla

You know what I’m a slut for? When a character visibly drops a ruse. Like, the way their face changes the moment they give up a facade and reveal themselves.

This applies to revealing love, apathy, anger, evil intent. I mcfuckin love it.

creativemercinary

It’s amazing in the reverse, too.

Someone crosses a line and the character slams a front up so fast that the others crash into it face-first and have whiplash.

Picture this:

The character is relaxed, with a bunch of other named characters. They’re all having a discussion about something important, and the conversation develops so that it turns into a back-and-forth between the character and someone else.

And then the other person says something personal.

The character stops. They tilt their head, sickly-sweet or feux-placid smile on their face and malice in their eyes. Then they say something that chills everyone around them

“Oh?”