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Last month ended with my little brother stealing one of our cars.

And then he did it again.

Mom punished him, and made him go to great wolf lodge with her and the youngest two and a friendship with kids their age. All driving in one car completely squished.

Then it was Mother’s Day and she was sick.

Then it was my dad’s birthday. And that night they were going to the symphony because that was his present. And they found a stray dog and we dealt with that. (He’s in a foster home)

That was 2 weekends ago. Last week my brother escalated to the point that I had to trick him into meeting up with mom and her taking him in for a psych hold. That morning I had set up training for my dog.

My brother has been in a facility in another state for the last week and was going to come home tomorrow but we found part of a builder gun(?) on the 3-4 search of his room. Also drugs and alcohol.

And my little sister had surgery this week

And it’s the last week of school for them all. And one is supposed to go to camp with our mom on Sunday.

Then last night our family friend called because she was scared she was going to pass out and scare her kids. She’d been vomiting all day and had diarrhea the last 3? She’d is trying a glp1 for her pcos (pmos?) and she did not eat anything since Sunday evening. So I got home yesterday from taking the youngest to speech, and was in the bathroom and got a call from her son asking for help. I rushed over, they had called 911 in the meantime, and I got there and had her boys pack a bag because they were definitely spending the night with us. The emts for there and realized that she was having a panic attack and talked her through that enough that she could walk. I took her boys to my house and then her to the ER, and they got her seen and started treatment pretty quick, but I stayed with her until she was discharged at like 11:00. I made her come to our house because of the meds and her anxiety. She also had a very bad migraine so most of the treatment was that.

I did not get to sleep until about 1 am because the youngest could not sleep.

Then I got up and took kids to school and then went to work and then came home and helped with the room search. Then took one kid to dance, and took my dog to practice training while she was in dance. Then mom figured out what the gun was, so I had to keep her out longer. We went to Lowe’s and got locks for the cabinet with alcohol and the one with the knives.

Picked up more meds, got kid and other meds from friends house and made it home.

All the while my older siblings were bitching in the group chat that mom had never listened to them about getting our brother help, yet I’ve been here and I know that they have been telling her that she has to be kind to him. I know that they jumped on me for telling him that he was drinking too much caffeine (300mg energy drink in 15 minutes) and I know that our oldest brother acted like mom and I were making too big of a deal about worrying if he was doing drugs or selling shit at Christmas.

But did any of them offer to stay with us and help? Or have him stay with them and talk to him? Or even fucking talk to him? Or sit down with mom and help her go through the process of finding him therapy and making him go? Or did they just send her ideas and tell her she was both too strict and too soft with the younger kids?

Did any of them listen when mom said she needed help with dad because he fucking zones out 2/3s of the time and can barely do anything? Did any of them offer to come over and help with finances or cleaning or helping mom make space in her studio so she could have time to think and work?

No. But they have time to complain that she took 2 hours to herself at a nice hotel after driving to another state to visit our brother and spent the day gathering supplies for him and and needed to stop so that she didn’t drive while tired. They are upset that she made a facebook post about the 2 hours she had and the single margarita. Before she drove home to her other 3 high needs kids and high needs husband.

As if we have not been trying to get him to take his medication and be safe for the last year since his concussion? As if we are not calling him and reminding him to take it and watching him take it and driving him to and from school that is a 10 minute walk? And letting friends come over even when we don’t like them only to learn that their parents don’t even like them?

At some point I’m going to cry and break down. I hope that it is tonight because tomorrow is that last day of school and it’s a half day. And I have to drive my dog to school, drive kids to school, take the other 2 dogs for grooming, and at some point make sure that I eat and don’t pass out or get a migraine that I expect is coming and is going to be bad.

And I’m taking care of 3 dogs. But only one is mine. My little brothers I understand stepping up to care for her, he’s not here right now. My little sister does not live here but her dog does because it was lonely. And I care for the bearded dragon that my little brother got last year when he asked for a fish.

I was driving my baby bro home from school today and first he asked me to pretend that gravity was turning off in 4 seconds. We talked about how that would be scary.

Then a couple minutes later he said “I know how the earth was created.”

How?

“A long time ago before there were humans, but there were still astronauts in space, there was no earth. Then the astronauts went into space in a rocket. They found all the pieces to make a planet and they put it together. One astronaut said ‘we should call this earth’”

Where did the astronauts come from?

“The moon”

A few years ago I worked tech for our local Shakespeare in the park. I thought it was volunteer, but I did get paid, admittedly probably less money than it cost for my Ubers to get there, but still. (I did not have a license at the time)

I used that money to purchase a pair of skullcandy over ear headphones. The shape fit comfortably over my ears without squishing them. I used them until they fell apart, and my mom got me a new pair for my birthday, I used those past when they fell apart, but I had to get a new pair thanksgiving 2025, because while playing outside with my siblings, the ear pads and speaker parts got covered in dirt and were not fixable by me.

I tried a cheap pair to hold me over, but they hurt and stressed me out. So I bought a pair at Best Buy with their Black Friday sale, on Tuesday.

About a month ago, that pair started failing cosmetically, the pleather coming unglued and the paint chipping.

Yesterday I went to Best Buy and they traded them for a brand new pair.

I am very autistic.

I like these, skullcandy crusher anc 2, because of their features, the fact that I don’t have to use an app to control them, they are lighter than Bose, and they are soft.

I just looked and the first pair was bought November 2022.

I started watching true blood again. They did put a lot of thought into how coming out to the world as vampires would affect life.

But they also completely overlooked that seasons 1-3 bill is the kinda guy who followed along with what happened to his family after he turned. And would definitely know who his descendants are, I know that one of the reasons he claimed to move back was because the last living relative died, but that only tracked with the house inheritance, not blood relatives. Especially in a small town in the south where everyone knows everything and everyone.

So in season 4, after bill goes mask off and admits that he manipulated sookie at the behest of the queen, he’s a different guy sure. But he doesn’t realize that he’s related to the bellfleurs? And they actually have him sleep with his great great …… granddaughter. And only find out afterwards while looking at the family tree in her grandmothers Bible. And then they have the woman try to convince him it’s fine because they are barely related, incest is frowned upon because of the risk of genetic defects, but vampires and humans can’t have offspring, there are people in the town who are cousins, it’s not illegal to date your grandfather.

Season finale of 911, (I watched the Nashville episode first because I new it would be less intense, still dumb, but Blythe might be a murderer! Very excited to see how that plays out. Also don is not worth all the stress and effort)

So OG 911. I joked to myself before playing it “oh what if they kill off Eddie? That would be hilarious, but they just killed Bobby so probably too soon for another death” the joke was on me. Athena is recovering for a gun shot (det hooks shot her to cover up the humans trafficking he’s involved in) she’s in a coma and on a ventilator. Everyone is waiting in the hospital. Eddie prays. Eddie gets stabbed in the chapel by the son of the bad guy hooks killed while shooting Athena. He crawls his way to an elevator. Bad guys kid has a gun and sends the hospital into lockdown, which prevents everyone from moving around the hospital.

May and Ravi are trying to hide Athena so the gunman does not find and kill her. They are freaking out about making sure her O2 is good because they disconnected the ventilator. Which if fine. And they easily could have grabbed a bag and kept her breathing that way. Instead they are stressed about her O2 going below 90. It started at 93. Then it they commented on it being 93.

Eddie is stuck in the elevator.

Buck and Harry are about to cut the power to the hospital by crawling through vents die hard style. So that the door open. Because according to Josh and Maddie at the dispatch center, all the life support equipment has a backup that will kick in after 10 seconds. I do not think that what they are doing is necessary.

Hen and chimney have opened a man’s chest in the waiting room so that they can do cardiac massage, be he was shot by the bad guy right before lockdown.

I know that the episodes and story’s are nonsense anyway but this is just too much.

Also the child that was born of bucks sperm donation to his old friend, is about 4, was the center of the episode last week, and was orphaned by a car crash. He’s in a foster placement, so we will see who takes him in. Hen? Maddie? Eddie? Or will buck?

Migraines are bad.

Mine have always been weather focused, with some food and smell triggers.

When I lived in NC I was in a near constant state of headache, and didn’t realize that was not typical.

In NM there is less atmospheric pressure, so there are days when my head does not hurt. But it’s been the windy season and stirring up dirt and shit, so I’ve been having more than 15 headache days a month. I have to wait until the 11th to refill my rescue meds.

And for some reason we are having lots of storm clouds rolling in and out, which gives me migraines.

In a month or so monsoon season will start.

My Dr is helping me switch to the vyepti infusion as a preventative (from qulipta) and hopefully in combination with the Botox, it will reduce the number of headaches I have. Because at the moment all that’s happening is that the physical pain is leased from previous 7-8 to 4-6.

This is the last medicine preventative available.

I’m going to PT right now for my shoulders/neck, and hopefully that helps.

I may have to start getting massages like my mom does. But the idea of someone touching me is not pleasant.

I also want to have my Dr check my intracranial pressure.