MERAKI

every story has a meaning.

[apolloenthusiast-blog]

"life is an experience and a learning process".

[apolloenthusiast-blog]

He drinks.

I blame myself bcs i let him drink. I hate myself. I don't want him to drink. I really don't. It just breaks my heart to see him hold the bottle. I hate it. So much. I need someone to talk but i literally have no one. I have no friends to talk. And i actually afraid to talk about this to him. Sometimes i just hate myself bcs i always keep it to myself.

[apolloenthusiast-blog]

I'll miss you.. So much.. I don't know how my day will be without you everyday.. I don't know if I'm strong enough to have a long distance relationship.. Oh Lord, please give me strength. I love him so much and that's why i can't imagine how my days will be like without him calling, asking if I'm okay. Do i have any problem to talk about.. I will miss that.. I hate crying. He go for his future. I should be happy for him because he's happy but i don't know. Maybe bcs the fear of losing him but we are not even breakup.. What's wrong with me? I'm just not ready for all of this. Each day i lose the persone that i trust and i love so much. It's either they left me or i left them.. Fuck feelings.. Can someone tell him how much i love him? Can someone tell him that I'm scared of losing him?..

[apolloenthusiast-blog]

FALL IN LOVE WHEN YOU ARE READY,NOT WHEN YOU'RE LONELY

pinterest

[apolloenthusiast-blog]

FEELINGS??

I was sitting on the sofa while watching tv, and suddenly.. i felt something wrong. Something is bothering me and I’m in an angry state. I just don’t know the real reason but I know that it has soemthing to do with my relationship. I feel like someone is going to manipulate and break my relationship with my boyfriend..I seriously don’t know why.. I told him about this and he said it was melancholy which i think not. I wish I had a friend to talk to about everything... 

[apolloenthusiast-blog]

He usually calls me at night but he didn't last night and tonight. I felt lonely. I just need someone to talk to..

[apolloenthusiast-blog]

It's just pissed me off. I wanted to talk to him since i have to wake up early tomorrow but this guy here ignore me. Seriously dude?

[apolloenthusiast-blog]

HE PLAYS THE ROLE

He is my boyfriend, best friend and also enemy.

I argue with him about things that makes me angry (enemy roles) and then i tell him why it makes me angry (best friend roles) and after that, he console me (boyfriend roles) . I love him for that. He's everything.

What if I lose him?

Oh shit.. I can't imagine that.. FUCK!

[apolloenthusiast-blog]

WHAT IS LOVE?

Love (:/laf) - it’s something that will come to you suddenly. it called true love and it is true. true love does exist. people tend to blame the love for hurting them. well, love never been wrong. if you are hurt, the person who dont appreciate your love should be blame for and not the love. love is pure,innocent and we, human create the memories in it. love teaches us many things. it teaches us how to appreciate, to love, responsibility, love yourself and basically it includes everything. there’s always a thing that can make us love something or someone. give yourself a chance to love if you are broken inside. it’s never too late to learn how to love again.