sigmardor:
I don’t want to be alone anymore. It guided his hands, the way his muscles tensed under skin and fabric, straining against it like just touching couldn’t be sufficient anymore and pulling Apricot closer and into a hug just wasn’t enough. Still, changing some things, crawling out of his own skin to move towards being a better something he could not achieve being, that was out of his realm of capabilities. But he could hug Apricot. He could cradle him to his chest and breathe again without obstruction. “You’re not alone,” he whispered, lips moving against the top of the man’s head. “I’m right here, am I not?” One hand slipped into Apricot’s hair, not to tug or pull or to massage the man’s scalp like it’d become habit, but just to touch and be there.
“Yeah, bit obvious,” he faintly snorted as though it’d been a joke. A breath left Sigma and he hummed right after, the fingers of his other hand painting patterns into the man’s back. Silence lingered then, before Sigma opened his mouth. “Do you… have any tea?”
“you’re not here,” apricot protested, immediately contrasting his own actions, the way he almost reluctantly wrapped his arms around sigma then, fingers curling into the fabric of the man’s shirt, grasping tightly. “i told you to leave and you did, and now half the stuff in here is missing and you’re not here.” it was an almost typical complaint on his part if it wasn’t for the fact that it was part of something larger -- this itch in the back of his throat that he hadn’t managed to clear yet, to which his words could only be a preparation, setting up the scene. “and that’s.. that’s for the better. right ?? sig, i -- i want to fix this. but you don’t deserve to be dragged back into any of this.” at that, one of his hands let go of sigma, vaguely gestured behind the man’s back as if to show off the apartment, like being here and apricot were this odd package deal, though he doubted sigma even noticed.
“what, i’m sorry for not seeking out therapy before now. i was a bit too busy lying to you about having three siblings, it took up a lot of my time,” apricot remarked then, no necessary bite to his tone, only his characteristic indifference indicating a joke that probably wasn’t one, and probably wouldn’t be taken as one. maybe it was one way to try and keep his distance from sigma, still, as though he could truly stay away when he’d never wanted to, and he hadn’t let go of sigma yet anyway. he nodded. “yeah, got tea. you want tea ??” he muttered, though he only buried his face into sigma’s chest then, and made no actual attempt to move or get a kettle on.






