troodont-bother-me

she/her (don't be discouraged by my silly dinosaur pun, you can approach me any time :))

[feldfrog]

If a fantasy world has an ancient tree of wisdom, that means it must also have young trees that are dumb as shit. Just giving terrible advice like, "the evil wizard is kinda hot"'

[felawnie]

@marlynnofmany

[marlynnofmany]

#that would be hilarious #you'd have to measure trees to make sure they knew what they were talking about

I can easily see this fantasy world having idioms like "Never take the advice of a tree that's small enough to hug."

(Also, I'll bet some of those young trees give bad advice on purpose, because entertainment is at a premium when you can't move around, and your morality system is very different from that of the meat creatures.) (What do trees know or care about the evil wizard's actual attractiveness? Sending him all these suitors is pretty funny though, so they're probably going to keep doing it.)

[sufficientlylargen]

Consider: Two Pando-style clonal forests that overlap. It appears to be a vast forest, but every single "tree" is actually just a ramet of one or the other clonal organsim. Both are Ancient Trees of Wisdom™, but also they hate each other; you can never be sure which of the two you're talking to, but you can be sure that any advice one of them gives the other will disagree with on principle.

[marlynnofmany]

Out: one guard lies and one tells the truth

In: one forest that speaks in a single voice will tell you dubious information, and the other will contradict it no matter what, and you can't begin to categorize what kind of situationship they have going on, but they're clearly working through something on a geologic timescale

[lakemojave]

It really helps to not be picky about what art you engage with actually. Gotta mix up your diet a bit from time to time

[lakemojave]

If you find you're bored of the folk punk you always listen to, try out a rap album. If you only ever watch classic cinema or more grounded art films, check out a fast and furious movie or something. Or try reading a book if you only ever consume film or tv. Or comics. Or go to an art museum. You may not like whatever it is you try out, and I promise you don't have to like it, but I can guarantee that you can't subsist on a monoculture. Be open to experiencing new art. Even if it's bad. Especially if it's bad, actually.

[chronophobica]

what they DONT tell you about clarinets is that you have to fucking build the damn thing every single time. "what instrument do you play" fucking legos man idk

[alphabetizing-posts]

about build clarinets damn do DONT every fucking fucking have idk instrument is legos man play" single tell that the they thing time. to what "what you you you

[howverychaotic]

I really need to start reading the blog name because I thought I was having some sort of moment right there.

[quietwingsinthesky]

friend is trying to convince me this is a common experience and I do not believe her, so

Do you expect to be paid back if you pay for something for your friend while you’re hanging out? (I.E. a ride, a meal, a trinket.)

Yes, always

Yes, but only if it’s above a limit of money

No, never

I don’t buy things for my friends.

bald button

Remaining time: 1 day 10 hours

For a more illustrative example, say you go to the movies with a friend and you buy them popcorn, do you expect them at some point to send you money back via cash or through an app of some kind? Will you be upset if they don’t?

[spin-the-wheel-polls]

I will regret this and shouldn't make wheels at 2am but

This tumblr sexyman is your son!

Are you proud of him

yes!

somewhat

I shouldn't be but yes

No

NO.

I'm disowning him

I am scared of him

Results

Remaining time: 5 days 23 hours

(sorry if your favourite is not in this poll, I went mostly off the contenders from this year's poll and the classics)

[thecryptkeeper]

i know the way people talk about their pets now is probably how we’ve been doing it for all of history. a cat owner in ancient rome saw their cat lounging on the dining pillows and commented “he thinks himself to be the senator claudius 🤣”

[library-seraph]

The first attested cat in Japan was given to a young 9th century emperor and his diary about it includes such gems as 'I affixed a bow about its neck, but it did not remain for long.", "The color of the fur is peerless. None could find the words to describe it, although one said it was reminiscent of the deepest ink.", "When it lies down, it curls in a circle like a coin. You cannot see its feet. It’s as if it were circular Bi disk." and "I am convinced it is superior to all other cats.” Basically posting about how his void is the best little void and so good at getting really round

[tallowandport]

Humans are pretty prone to mimicking noises. like even subconsciously. sometimes we even unintentionally pick up entirely different accents. and you literally can't tell me you've never meowed or woofed or chirped back at a cat/dog/bird at least once in your life (unless you are physically/audibly unable to do so).

So Grace 1000% starts picking up and mimicking Eridian noises.

One day, Rocky will be working on something, only to freeze as he hears Grace behind him suddenly exclaim in fluent Eridian "SHIT!"

Turns out Eridian swear words are usually expressed in the same decibel that humans can whistle in.

[crypticraccoon96]

We ain't leaving this in the comments

🐕‍🦺

[sealedbeastnue]

“what time is it” you ask, i pull out my 2.7 metric ton granite sundial and immediately crush both of your feet, I loudly announce “it is cloudy”

[ibenology]

the average twitter vs tumblr community experience

[fourohfourlifenotfound]

[pineappical]

thinking about statues of Grace being built all around Erid years after his passing so he can continue to watch over Eridians as they sleep

[kiapet2]

It's commonly accepted in this fandom that humans have extremely fragile bodies in comparison to Eridians, but I think that's actually an oversimplification.

Because while Eridians are incredibly strong and tough on the outside, on the inside they are actually quite fragile:

They have no immune system, so anything that makes it past their enclosed carapace and internal heating will pretty much kill them

They have no natural defenses to radiation of any kind

In general they have very little organic matter so anything that targets their cells directly is quickly lethal

They are partially cold-blooded and live at a very narrow temperature range (about 20 degrees C)

They rely almost entirely on one, highly developed sense and are helpless if deafened (can't even remember the layout of a room)

They are completely helpless while asleep and can't control when that happens

They will forcibly become dormant after eating AND when badly hurt enough (their equivalent of going into shock)

They require more energy to function than humans do, and have very little organic matter to burn in the case of starvation

In contrast, humans:

Have an aggressive immune system and internal mechanisms for dealing with cell damage

Have adrenaline which allows them to temporarily ignore injuries and perform abnormal feats of strength

Are persistence hunters built for economy of movement and capable of extreme levels of endurance

Exist in a very wide range of habitats and on a diverse diet

Are very hardy in general, able to survive massive injuries, lack of sleep, prolonged starvation, and intense environmental conditions if given proper care

The quintessential example of this dichotomy between strength and endurance is the Going Fishing incident in the book: Rocky is able to survive and move in G forces that are killing Grace and to physically wrestle off the chair crushing him, but he collapses from his injuries almost immediately after. Despite being injured himself Grace then carries his 400lb friend up a ladder, is badly burned returning him to his atmosphere, and then proceeds to get some basic medical care, hype himself up on pain meds and keep working (albeit rather badly, lol) while Rocky forcibly sleeps.

The TL:DR is that Eridians are harder to damage, but easier to kill. They're like an rpg character with high armor and low health. I think Rocky would consider Grace to be very delicate at first, only to be blown away by how deceptively tough his friend can be.

[vesper-potato]

[lafemmeressort1]

i lied. there’s no sex. put your clothes back on. I’m going to spend the next hours explaining why the Camarilla is technically a homeowners association with fangs.

[newv2b]

oh do tell

[bowlifecomics]

It makes me happy when they listen

[cheap-pink-mints]

[bowlifecomics]

YES. YES YES YES THANK YOU

[manipulated-pieces]

Why is it easier and more comfortable to sit in a position that actively damages my joints than it is to just sit with okay posture. Why does my body crave its own destruction

[ravioliet]

fake "secret third thing" fans when a queerplatonic relationship they can't portray as romance lite walks in

[fatliberation]

I don’t have time to unpack my full thoughts on the whole argument of ‘you shouldn’t be a burden to the healthcare system’ but I would like to chime in on it:

so, all athletes should immediately stop playing sports. construction workers, anyone with jobs that put them at risk, they need to find different employment. people with uteruses shouldn’t ever get pregnant, either. actually you know what? don’t enter a car or vehicle at all! and don’t even get me started on old people. what age do we think they should just give it up & throw in the towel? 50? 60? after that they become way too burdensome. it’s a problem.

sweet baby eugenicist, your anger is misplaced. they want you to blame yourself instead of their crumbling system. you should be asking, what kind of a fucking healthcare system is it if it can be burdened by the very thing it exists to provide? which is healthcare?!

[nymph1e]

On Discomfort and Morality

My father finds gay men uncomfortable.

He's told me before that it's like a knee-jerk for him. Something he doesn't consciously control. He sees two men behaving romantically, and his body reacts with mild discomfort.

In the 1960s, when he was in high school, most of the boys in his form thought he was gay on the simple fact that he wasn't homophobic. He wouldn't participate in insulting queer people, he didn't care if someone was gay, he wouldn't have a problem hanging out with gay people. So people thought he was gay. That's how prevalent homophobia was in his formative years.

When I was 10, my dad told me very seriously that Holmes and Watson were gay. That it was obvious from the literature and the time period that they were meant to be a gay couple. When I was 14 and I came out to my parents as bi, when my mum was upset my dad ripped into her for it. Told her that she was being stupid, that it was my life to live how I wanted to and that she needed to get over herself.

My dad formed my views on censorship: that being that it was completely ridiculous and thoroughly evil. He didn't believe in censorship of any kind. If I asked him a question about sex, he answered it honestly. When I was 12 and I asked him about homosexuality, still young and uncertain, he told me that there was nothing wrong with it. That it was just how some people were. That there was likely an evolutionary reason for it. And that for some people it was uncomfortable on an instinctual level.

He taught me that just because you're uncomfortable with something, doesn't make it wrong. He also taught me that most people don't understand this.

I see a lot of this on the internet as of the last few years. The anti shipping movement, the terf movement, the anti ace movement. It all stems from discomfort that people have crossed wires into believing means wrong. Really every -ism and -phobia out there stems from this same fundamental aspect of humanity.

The next time you see something and you automatically think it's disgusting, or wrong, or immoral, I invite you to ask yourself: is this actually wrong or does this just make me uncomfortable?