Fat Shining Armor

Hi. My name is Shining Armor, I'm the former captain of the Equestrian Royal Guard, and now a Noblestallion of the Crystal Empire. My sister Twilight and I are the best of friends, and my amazing buddy Cadence is a really nice young mare. Anyways, feel free to ask me questions, or just talk! I'd appreciate it a lot. M!A: None

[ask-fatty-armor]

Do you like bleu cheese?

Yes. It's good on spicy hay fries.

[howdoponieswork]

Twilight put up a picture of a hunky stallion to make sure Shining Armor felt at home.

You never forget your first crush.

[ask-fatty-armor]

Well, I'll tell you one thing... It sure wasn't a phase.

[thefortressofscience]

I’m cute

[raggedick]

OK Tumblr,  i see a lot of reblogs for Bernie here but we have to make sure we’re taking actions to ensure he has a fighting chance in this arena. His opponents have the money and the media circus backing them but he has us, so let’s run it!  The primaries are elections held months before the ACTUAL presidential election that basically decide who the main candidates for each party will be, specifically, who will be listed on the ballot in the election in november. if we want Bernie to stand a chance at all he MUST be on the ballot in November. For that to become a reality we need everyone reading this to get them and their friends to vote in the Primaries! I’ve used the site www.voteforbernie.org to list the following info below so you can all see it easily enough and share it with just a click. Check your state below for the appropriate information on when and how to vote in the primaries!  Below are the registration and voting dates for all 50 states, Puerto Rico and Washington DC (as a separate voting date). Be sure to register! Click your state to find out how! Below is a key to reading the following information! Some states have open registration meaning it doesn’t matter which party you’re registered as, you can still vote for Bernie. *** Some states are CLOSED meaning you MUST be registered as DEMOCRAT by the date’s i’ve listed to vote for Bernie.  *~* Some states are SEMI-CLOSED meaning you must be registed as DEMOCRAT or UNDECLARED to vote for Bernie. # means you can register or switch parties the day of voting at the voting station.  NEW YORK!!! you have less than 30 days to register even tho your primaries aren’t until April. PLEASE GO REGISTER AND TELL EVERYONE ELSE! Alabama - Tuesday, March 1st (register by February 19th) Alaska - Saturday, March 26th *** # (register by January 19th)    Arizona - Tuesday, March 22nd *** (register by February 22nd) Arkansas - Tuesday, March 1st (register by January 31st) California - Tuesday, June 7th *~* (register by May 23rd) Colorado  - Tuesday, March 1st *** (register by January 1st) Connecticut - April, 26th *** (register by January 26th) Delaware - Tuesday, April 26th *** (register by April 2nd Washington, DC - Tuesday, June 14th*** (register by May 15th) Florida - Tuesday, March 15th *** (register by February 16th) Georgia - Tuesday, March 1st (February 1st) Hawaii - Saturday, March 26th *~* # (register by February 25th) Idaho - TBD (check the site early next year!)*~* Illinois - Tuesday, March 15th *~* # (register by February 16th) Indiana - Tuesday, May 3rd (register by April 4th) Iowa - Monday, February 1st *~* # (can register day of!) Kansas - Saturday, March 5th *** (register by March 5th) Kentucky - Tuesday, May 17th *** (register by April 18th) Louisiana - Saturday, March 5th *** (register by February 4th) Maine - Sunday, March 6th *** (register by February 14th) Maryland - Tuesday, April 26th *** (register by April 5th) Massachusetts - Tuesday, March 1st *~* (register by February 10th) Michigan - Tuesday, March 8th (register by February 7th) Minnesota - Tuesday, March 1st (register by February 9th)    Mississippi - Tuesday, March 8th (register by February 7th) Missouri - Tuesday, March 15th (register by February 17th) Montana - Tuesday, June 7th (register by May 8th) Nebraska - Saturday, March 5th *** (register by February 19th) Nevada - Saturday, February 20th *** (register by January 20th) New Hampshire - Tuesday, February 9th *~* # (register by January 30th) New Jersey - Tuesday, June 7th *** # (register by May 17th) New Mexico - Tuesday, June 7th *** (register by May 10th) New York - Tuesday, April 19th *** (register by October 9th 2015) North Carolina - Tuesday, March 1st *~* (register by February 5th) North Dakota TBD (check the site early next year!) Ohio - Tuesday, March 15th *~* (register by February 14th) Oklahoma - Tuesday, March 1st *~* (register by February 5th) Oregon - Tuesday, May 17th *~* (register by April 26th) Pennsylvania - Tuesday, April 26th *** (register by March 27th) Puerto Rico - Sunday, June 5th (register date TBD) Rhode Island - Tuesday, April 26th *~* (register by March 27th) South Carolina - Saturday, February 27th (register by January 28th) South Dakota - Tuesday, June 7th *~* (register by May 23rd) Tennessee - Tuesday, March 1st (register by January 31st) Texas - Tuesday, March 1st (register by January 31st) Utah - Tuesday, March 22nd *~* (register by February 21st) Vermont - Tuesday, March 1st (register by February 24th) Virginia - Tuesday, March 1st  (register by February 8th) Washington - Saturday, March 26th (register by July 6th) West Virginia - Tuesday, May 10th*~* (register by April 19th) Wisconsin - Tuesday, April 5th (register by March 16th) Wyoming - Saturday, April 9th*** (register by March 26)

[ask-fatty-armor]

"Whoa, what happened to ya?!" Braeburn asks as he lays eyes on the immobilized stallion. He walked around Shining Armor's massive flabby form, taking in everything. From his beanbag chair sized rump to his face buried in a mass of neck rolls.

-Shining whinnies- I was just goin’ out to get my mail and I blew up like a balloon!

[ask-fatty-armor]

Do you have any trouble breathing with all that fat?

A-A little. It’s not too bad, though... -he’s breathing heavily-

[ask-fatty-armor]

*poof* you are now 500 pounds heavier for the next 10 posts.

*poof* Huh? Hey, what happened to the floor? -tries to walk, but fails miserably- Aw, c’mon... -he pouts, stuck in his front yard, out in the open-

[ask-fatty-armor]

Do you ever wear underwear? Because I think you'd looked nice with a pair of tighty whities hugging close to your fat butt.

Well, uh, thanks! -smiles- Like most ponies, I don’t really wear clothes all that often, but I’ll look into a pair of underwear sometime.

[ask-fatty-armor]

*sniffs the air* is that smell the low tide or your farts?

-laughs- Rude!

[ask-fatty-armor]

Do you know who took your place as captain in Canterlot?

A stallion named Golden Shield. He’s pretty nice. I met him once or twice, and we had a couple donuts.

[ask-fatty-armor]

Have you ever swallowed/eaten a pony/foal?

Erm, no. No, I haven’t. Jeez...

[ask-fatty-armor]

Are you sure you're a prince? You don't seem very regal to me.

I’m a prince, yeah, just not very high on the food chain. I don’t have to be regal and annoying like some of the others do. -belches- I really should limit my soda intake, though, it gives me gas.

[ask-fatty-armor]

So I guess this blog is dead, huh?

Sorry, I’ve been busy with my FFXIV blog, valliantstorme.tumblr.com! Come in over if ya feel like it.

[ask-fatty-armor]

Would you like to get into pro wrestling?

Erm, no... I’m fine as I am. I might want to do that later, though, so keep the offer open...

[ask-fatty-armor]

How did you feel when your mother first told you she was pregnant with Twilight? Were you ready to be a big brother?

I was really excited! We didn’t know whether Twily was going to be a colt or a filly yet, so I still have a box in my attic full of “Hello Dusk!” drawings I made for her when she was still in Mom. She was an awesome little sister though, and I miss her when she’s out in Ponyville.

[ask-fatty-armor]

Do you like to fart?

Eh, it’s alright. Too much and it gets uncomfortable, though.

[ask-fatty-armor]

How often do you pig out on food?

All the time, why do you ask? -the well–fed stallion games a bite of a corn dog-