FEAR NOT HUMANS I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM HERE TO HELP

(A Post-Pacifist Papyrus Ask Blog, Icon by Mitokondrio)   MY BROTHER HAS INFORMED ME THAT THERE ARE MANY HUMANS ONLINE WISHING TO MAKE FRIENDS WITH A COOL SKELETON GUY. SEEING AS I AM SO VERY GREAT, I THOUGHT I WOULD OFFER MY SERVICES AS YOUR COOL ONLINE FRIEND.

[askthegreatpap]

It seems I made a mistake

Hello everyone. It appears I owe you all an apology. Several months back, I made a post detailing that I would not be continuing this blog, and would basically be leaving it up as an archive. My intention was to post it on my main, where many of this blog’s followers came from, and reblog it over here. But looking at the blog now it seems that I never reblogged the post. I’m so sorry. I never intended to just disappear into radio silence. The truth is, I created this blog because I wanted to help others. I thought that since I was helping other people that I’d be able to disconnect from the emotions in the ask and they wouldn’t affect me personally. I was wrong about that. The truth is that a lot of the things I was receiving in asks were just too heavy for me to deal with, not by any fault of the askers by any means. Personally I’m just not strong enough to do this. To help others like this. It took a toll on me and I couldn’t handle it. I’m sorry for that. I will be leaving the blog up with the previous asks that have already been answered. And maybe someday when I’m in a better emotional state myself I’ll be able to pick this up again. But as it stands right now, I can’t handle running a help blog. I’m so sorry to anyone I’ve let down. Know that I, and of course The Great Papyrus, love you dearly. I hope you all are well. 

[undertale-blog-masterlist]

Hey, if you are an Undertale Blog; reblog this.

Put the tags whether what canon character you are - or if you’re simply an OC blog - as well as the tags that suit you best [Ask], [RP], [Ask/RP], [VA] so on and so forth. An extra tag I would prefer people using so it gets my attention is undertale-blog-masterlist. This way navigation to find other people of the fandom is easier on oneself. Thank you. Have a nice day/night!

[askthegreatpap]

Do you not like San's puns?

I- I LOVE MY BROTHER VERY MUCH, PLEASE DO NOT BE MISTAKEN. AND OF COURSE I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM A SKELETON WITH NOT ONLY A GREAT PERSONALITY, BUT A GREAT SENSE OF HUMOR TO MATCH. THERE ARE SOME OF MY BROTHERS PUNS THAT I DO FIND VERY FUNNY, THOUGH I WOULD APPRECIATE IT VERY MUCH IF YOU DO NOT TELL HIM THAT. THE PROBLEM IS THAT SANS IS SO LAZY THAT HE REPEATS THE SAME PUNS OVER AND OVER AGAIN UNTIL I NO LONGER ENJOY THEM. HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU THINK HE HAS ASKED ME IF I WAS BONELY WITHOUT HIM? OR HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU THINK I HAVE HEARD HIM SAY "TIBIA" HONEST OR "HUMERUS"?THERE IS ONLY SO MUCH I CAN TAKE BEFORE DEVELOPING A SKULL-SPLITTING HEADACHE, HUMAN.

[askthegreatpap]

Hey Papyrus? How does one have faith, when they feel utterly useless? 'Cause I feel that way at times...lots of times...

HELLO HUMAN. I AM SORRY TO HEAR THAT YOU ARE HAVING ROUGH TIMES RIGHT NOW. IT CERTAINLY CAN BE HARD TO HAVE FAITH, I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEAN. BUT PLEASE HUMAN, REST ASSURED THAT YOU ARE NOT USELESS! I KNOW IT CAN FEEL THAT WAY SOMETIMES, BUT REMEMBER THAT SOMETIMES THE MOST USEFULL THINGS YOU CAN DO ARE THINGS THAT YOU WON'T ALWAYS SEE. SOMETHING I'VE OBSERVED IN HUMANS IS THAT YOU MAKE SUCH AN IMPACT ON THE WORLD AND YOU RARELY EVEN REALIZE IT. EVERY PERSON YOU TALK TO, YOU IMPACT. YOUR WORDS AND YOUR ACTIONS MAKE A DIFFERENCE, WHETHER YOU REALIZES IT OR NOT. SOMETHING AS SIMPLE AS A SMILE FROM YOU MAY VERY WELL BE THE THING THAT MAKES SOMEONE DECIDE TO KEEP LIVING THAT DAY. SOMETIMES THE WORLD CAN SEEM LIKE SUCH A DARK AND LONELY PLACE. BUT YOU ARE ALIVE. YOU ARE LIVING AND BREATHING AND THINKING. YOU HAVE SO MANY OPPORTUNITIES TO GROW AND CHANGE AND LEARN. AS LONG AS THERE IS LIFE IN YOU, THERE IS A CHANCE TO SEE AND EXPERIENCE THINGS THAT CAN CHANGE YOU COMPLETELY. THINGS MAY NOT BE PERFECT RIGHT NOW, BUT THERE IS SOMETHING MORE FOR YOU OUT IN THIS BIG WORLD. IT'S JUST ABOUT HOLDING ON UNTIL YOU CAN FIND IT. KEEP FAITH AND HOPE HUMAN, BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY BEAUTIFUL THINGS THAT YOU HAVEN'T SEEN. THERE ARE SO MANY EXPERIENCES YOU HAVEN'T LIVED. THE FUTURE IS FULL OF SO MANY POSSIBILITIES FOR YOU. YOU JUST HAVE TO BE WILLING TO REACH OUT FOR THEM. I HAVE FAITH IN YOU, HUMAN. YOU WILL FIND GREATNESS AND WONDER IN THIS WORLD. I CAN FEEL IT IN MY BONES.

[askthegreatpap]

Is sans very pun-ctual?

*Papyrus groans and his shoulders drop.* I HATE THIS

[askthegreatpap]

you are the cutest <3

AH, AHEM *Papyrus blushes a bit and chuckles* WELL HUMAN YOU CERTAINLY HAVE WONDERFUL TASTE TO HAVE RECOGNIZED MY INHERENT CUTENESS! THANK YOU FOR THE KIND COMPLIMENT!

[askthegreatpap]

*gives you a smooch ❤️

AH UM-UH U-UM...THANK YOU HUMAN YOU ARE....AH UM...*Papyrus is blushing and hiding his face in his hands*...such a cute human...

[askthegreatpap]

This might seem like a bit of an odd question, but.. what dating advice would you give to a person (or monster!) who has never been on a date before? N-no reason really! I was just wondering. Eh heh heh~. Oh, um.. I think you'd look fantastic with Small Lady's hairstyle, by the way.

AH, THANK YOU HUMAN FOR YOUR KIND COMPLIMENT! I, NATURALLY, LOOK GOING IN EVERYTHING! AS FOR YOUR QUESTION ABOUT DATING, YOU HAVE CERTAINLY COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAVE NEVER FAILED AT DATING! THE FIRST STEP IS TO ASK YOUR POTENTIAL DATE MATE OUT. THERE ARE MANY WAYS TO DO THIS! YOU COULD SLIP IT INTO CONVERSATION CASUALLY. FOR INSTANCE, SAY YOU ARE WATCHING THE LATEST MTT PROGRAM AND YOUR POTENTIAL DATE MATE TURNS TO YOU AND SAYS "METTATON IS SO COOL, ISN'T HE?" YOU COULD REPLY WITH, "YEAH, AND YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS COOL? ME! WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO GO ON A DATE WITH ME?" IT IS VERY EASY, YOU SEE! AFTER YOU HAVE SECURED THE DATE, MAKE SURE TO SECURE PROPER DATING ATTIRE. I KNOW THAT YOU CAN NEVER DRESS AS WELL AS ME, FOR I AM THE ONLY ONE WITH SUCH A WONDERFUL "COOL GUY" SHIRT, BUT I'M SURE YOU WILL THINK OF SOMETHING THAT WILL WORK FOR YOU. NOW, WHEN YOU ARE ON THE DATE, BE SURE TO GIVE YOUR DATE MATE A PRESENT. NATURALLY I ALWAYS PREPARE A TASTY PLATE OF MY WORLD-RENOWNED SPAGHETTI, BUT AS YOU ARE NOT ME AND YOUR SPAGHETTI IS NOT NEARLY SO RENOWNED YOU MAY NEED TO CONSIDER A DIFFERENT TYPE OF PRESENT. NOW, HERE IS THE FINAL AND MOST IMPORTANT STEP. AFTER YOU HAVE GIVEN YOUR DATE MATE THE GIFT IT IS TIME TO REJECT THEM. BE SURE TO REMAIN KIND AND LET THEM KNOW THAT YOU ARE JUST MUCH COOLER FOR THEM AND THEY ARE NOT TO BLAME FOR FALLING SO MADLY IN LOVE WITH YOU. GIVE THEM YOUR PHONE NUMBER AND PROMISE TO BE THEIR FRIEND. THEN LEAVE THEM ALONE IN YOUR BEDROOM SO THEY CAN CRY IN PRIVATE. AND THAT'S IT! THAT'S HOW YOU HAVE A SUCCESSFUL DATE! I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR DATING EXPERIENCE, HUMAN!((Please do not listen to Pap! Just be yourself and try to stay calm and casual for the first date. It's natural to be nervous but try not to let that keep you from having conversations with your partner. Make sure to try and keep a balance between what you talk about. Ask them about themselves and find ways to relate to them. Make sure not to make the conversation all about you, or all about them. It's very important to find a balance between the two. And most importantly just have fun! Dates should not be something you dread and if they are then the dating scene is not for you. Make sure that you're feeling comfortable and enjoying yourself. It's okay to try for more casual dates if you're not. i hope this helps!))

[askthegreatpap]

What would you do for a nice cream bar?

WELL I WOULD MOST CERTAINLY GIVE A HUG TO THE FRIENDLY NICE CREAM MAN AND PAY HIM ACCORDINGLY!

[askthegreatpap]

Papyrus, I must know! Are you a Pastafarian? Do you believe that the Flying Spaghetti Monster will touch our lives with his noodly appendage?

I WOULD CERTAINLY HOPE THERE IS NO GIANT SPAGHETTI MONSTER, HUMAN! IT WOULD BE GREATLY UPSETTING IF I WOULD HAVE TO FIGHT HIM IN ORDER TO CONTINUE ENJOYING MY FAVORITE CUISINE! ALSO, I OF COURSE KNOW WHAT A PASTAFARIAN IS SINCE I AM SO VERY BRILLIANT, BUT MAYBE YOU SHOULD EXPLAIN IT...FOR EVERYONE ELSE'S SAKE...

[askthegreatpap]

Just a quick note from the admin here. I know there are some asks in the box tonight and i want ya'll to know that i have read them and they definitely will be answered, but it wont be tonight. I'm very very tired i'm still adjusting to my brand new job and i would rather wait until i've gotten some rest to answer. Please dont get me wrong, it's not that the blog isnt a priority for me it's just that none of the answers I've tried to work on tonight feel like they are in character or good enough, and i'd like to give you guys my best. You all deserve my best, not any sort of half-assed answers. Please dont hesitate to keep sending asks in though! I'll probably answer them all tomorrow. Tonight i just need to rest. Thanks for the understaning guys!

[sansforthesoul]

The jig is up, Sans... Toriel knows... You gonna make a move?

* listen……

* i’m patelling the truth when i say it’s been a long time since i dated anyone. just thinking about asking her on a date makes me feel like i’ve got a femur. 

* i don’t remember how to woo anyone, much less a queen. i’m looking like a pawn under her ladyship.

[askthegreatpap]

SANS, AS YOUR BROTHER WHO HAS RECEIVED MANY A SMOOCH, I HAVE COME TO BRING YOU SOME ADVICE! DO NOT FRET ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT YOU MEASURE UP TO ROYALTY. WHILE YOU MAY NOT BE AS POPULAR OR CHARMING AS ME, YOU HAVE MANY DESIRABLE QUALITIES. MISS TORIEL SHOULD FEEL MOST HONORED FOR YOUR AFFECTIONS! IF ANYTHING, I WOULD SAY IT IS SHE THAT SHOULD NEED TO WORRY ABOUT BEING GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU!

ERM…WHAT I’M TRYING TO SAY BROTHER IS THAT YOU ARE THE APPLE OF MY EYE AND IRIS I WAS AS CLEVER AS YOU. EVEN AS GREAT AS I MAY BE, SANS, I ADMIRE YOU VERY MUCH. I THINK EVERYONE ELSE SHOULD TOO.

AND HEY, EVEN IF THINGS WITH MISS TORIEL DON’T WORK OUT FOR SOME REASON, I KNOW MANY HUMANS WHO WOULD FEEL MUCH LESS BONELY WITH YOU BY THEIR SIDE.

[askthegreatpap]

Could I have a hug, Papyrus? I've had a really rough day.

HUMAN, I AM SO SORRY YOUR DAY HAS BEEN SO ROUGH! OF COURSE YOU CAN HAVE ONE OF MY WORLD FAMOUS HUGS! COME CLOSE AND LET ME EMBRACE YOU!

[askthegreatpap]

Hey, Pap! I'm having a Halloween party this weekend, do you have any recommendations for spoopy music?

WELL HUMAN, I THINK THAT METTATON'S COUSIN NABSTABLOOK COULD PROBABLY HELP YOU WITH SOMETHING SEASONALLY APPROPRIATE! AND SHYREN IS REALLY GREAT AT SHRIEKING AND WAILING!((Midnight Syndicate and Two Steps From Hell both have really great spooky halloween albums!))

[askthegreatpap]

Hello, Papyrus! This is again, Toriel! A human came to me asking about your delicious spaghetti recipe. I must say, they did seem eager. You should make a tutorial... Or as sans would say... Tu-tori-al. Ha!

AH HELLO MISS TO...RI...OH...OH NO NOT YOU TOO MISS TORIEL! NOT THE PUNS FROM YOU TOO!

I...WELL YES, I DO SUPPOSE THAT I SHOULD SPREAD SPAGHETTI TO THE WHOLE WORLD. IT IS A WHOLESOME MEAL, MEANT TO BE SHARED BY FAMILY AND FRIENDS AND EVEN SOMETIMES YOUR ENEMIES! I WONDER IF I CAN CONVINCE METTATON TO LET ME TEACH IT ON HIS SHOW?

[askthegreatpap]

hi, pap. i don't know how busy you are, but if youre real busy then u dont have to answer this. i have this problem where my self esteem is really low, and when people say nice things to me they kinda go in one ear and out the other. it usually feels like i dont deserve the praise i get, that the things i do are mediocre at best, and that maybe people are just being nice because they think i've maxed out my potential. you always seem so confident and sure of yourself, though. how do you do it?

I HAVE MANY RESPONSIBILITIES, HUMAN. I AM THE AMBASSADOR BETWEEN HUMANS AND MONSTERS SO THERE ARE MANY THINGS I MUST DO FOR THEM. I MUST ALSO WATCH OVER MY BROTHER AND FRISK. I MUST MAKE SURE THAT ALL OF MY FRIENDS ARE HAPPY. I MUST KEEP UNDYNE FROM GETTING IN TOO MANY FIGHTS. I MUST SPREAD SPAGHETTI TO THE WORLD. BUT HUMAN, EVEN WITH ALL THESE THINGS I AM NEVER TOO BUSY FOR YOU.

I AM SORRY TO HEAR THAT YOU ARE DOUBTING YOURSELF. I KNOW THAT CONFIDENCE CAN BE HARD TO FIND. I AM SURE THIS WILL BE SURPRISING TO YOU HUMAN, BUT THERE WAS A TIME WHERE I TO HAD TROUBLE BEING CONFIDENT AS WELL. YOU WANT TO KNOW MY TRICK? WHEN I WAS NOT ABLE TO BELIEVE IN MYSELF, I BELIEVED IN SANS AND ALL MY FRIENDS. BECAUSE THE THING IS, HUMAN, PEOPLE WHO LIE TEND NOT TO LIE TO BE NICE. BEING NICE TAKES THOUGHTFULNESS AND ENERGY AND PEOPLE DO NOT LIKE TO WASTE THAT WITH LYING. 

WHEN PEOPLE SAY NICE THINGS TO YOU, THEY MEAN THEM. SOMETIMES IT CAN FEEL SO UNBELIEVABLE AND OVERWHELMING BECAUSE MANY TIMES THE PEOPLE WHO ARE COMPLIMENTING YOU ARE PEOPLE YOU ARE IMPRESSED BY AND PEOPLE YOU ADMIRE. BUT THE TRULY WONDERFUL THING IS THAT THESE PEOPLE TRULY DO LOVE AND ADMIRE YOU AS WELL! DON’T BE AFRAID OF THIS; YOU DESERVE IT! 

[askthegreatpap]

I just gotta ask, Papyrus. If you could have any hairstyle of your choosing, what would it be?

HUMAN THIS IS A FANTASTIC QUESTION! I ACTUALLY HAVE JUST THE HAIR STYLE IN MIND! I EVEN TOOK THE TIME TO DRAW IT FOR YOU!

I WOULD LIKE THE HAIR OF THE LOVELY SMALL LADY! NOT ONLY IS SHE ADORABLE, LIKE ME, BUT SHE ALSO HAS A LOVELY HORSEHORN FRIEND AND ALSO SHE HAS THIS SPECIAL FRIEND THAT IS LIKE A FLOATY ROUND CAT WHICH REMINDS ME OF SANS! CLEARLY THIS MEANS IT IS FATE!!!!