(( I’m sorry for not answering more asks, I’m feeling really down recently, I need friends, need someone to hug me, need someone to listen to me, be surrounded by people that don’t care who I really am, that I can be dumb and clumsy, without judging eyes around, without this anxious feeling about every giggle and every whisper, I want to go home and scream everything out, I want to go to other country and be a new me, I want to stop being sad because I know that there is people in worse situaition but I can’t, I’m really trying to be happy, to think about other things but it’s so hard. I don’t even know if I’m writting it all right, I just want to run from this reality and feel normal. I want to feel like I fit, I don’t want people talking how I should do or say things, how should I look and how awful I am. I want to be invisible, but at the same time I want someone to notice me. I feel like running towards a car at the streets so it will stop but I know that If i do it and fail it all will get worse. I’m annoying, I’m dumb, I’m not in college, I’m young but too old, I’m not pretty, I’m a fool, people play with my heart but I can’t be away from them, I don’t want to be lonely, but I can’t be with someone, I don’t even know what I’m writting anymore I just want it all to be over
