patrice bergeron. enough said.
brad marchand. short. an amazing human being. an amazing player. tons of nhl players actually really like him. he saved the gays. amazing dad and husband. step dad to be exact, which is rare to see and it is great representation. brad is love brad is life.
torey krug. he’s also short. an amazing offensive defenseman. sassy af but goes unnoticed. fought andrew shaw. his dog, fenway krug, is the best dog out there. loves david pastrnak.
adam mcquaid. fucking savage. will fight anyone who gets in his or his teammates way. not only a great defensive defenseman, but also defends all of his teammates when they get hurt. angel. shy and awkward. literal model.
david pastrnak. sunshine and rainbows. gorgeous smile. adorable laugh. cute accent. amazing player. loves his team and is so positive about life even after having to deal with some tough shit in his life. hilarious and good™. gets to play beside his idol, krejci.
tuukka rask. seems angry. probably is but also very funny and nice. great with kids. milk crates. amazing elite goalie. takes care of his teammates when hurt. he always will leave his crease when he sees one of them in pain. loves chicken wings. once said his celeb crush is beyoncé. great father and boyfriend.
david krejci. soft. good at everything. french fries. he was better than crosby and malkin and letang combined once. loves david pastrnak like he is his own. plays ping pong. great father.
zdeno chara. captain. greatest captain the bruins have ever had. tall. father figure for his entire team. giant hugger. he’s a literal bear. polygot. first endorser of You Can Play. loves the biebs. his kids are adorable. his cellys are the best.
brandon carlo. soft use of memes. also very tall. the next chara basically. rookie that has gone unnoticed. very underrated. loves his mom. loves life.
david backes. big davo. loves animals. loves his wife since they met in kindergarten. has a charity for animals. owns many pets. he’s a dad. a great one. one time dissed pasta amazingly. great fighter. great person overall.
colin miller. underrated defenseman. overall good at everything on the ice. great shot.
kevin miller. another savage. pretty eyes. pretty face. large and in charge. america. nickname is killer. but he’s nice i promise.
anton khudobin. cute. came out strong for us when we needed him most. adorable chubby face. great accent. loves tuukka. same though.
frank vatrano. italian boy. speedy. shooting pucks is love shooting pucks is life. hurt a lot but so good. we love him. pulls off joggers and snap backs. loves noel acciari.
noel acciari. finally scored his first nhl goal. he’s a train. don’t get in his way. great clean hitter. no one expects it. rhode island boy. loves frank vatrano.
drew stafford. deadline jesus. scored the winning goal in the last second. has 37 of those. damn son.
riley nash. big red. great fourth liner. should be appreciated more. scores whenever we need it the most.
dominic moore: shorty king along side brad. also always shooting those empty netters. brave man. positive guy and also went through a ton of shit.
matt beleskey. skey. people hate that. his daughter was just born. her name is ivy and that’s beautiful. makes fun of pasta. same though. went to china. pretty sick. loves his team. deals with a lot of shit.
ryan spooner. spoons. also saving my life tbh. emo. his girlfriend parker is a queen. she’s my hero. his teeth are cute. he’s cute. i love.
john michael-liles. good dad. daddy. helps when he can. dealt with a concussion. nice guy.
jimmy hayes. boston boy. everyone hates him but i appreciate his love for his team. made valentines. coined the names big davo, davo, and little davo.
joe morrow. doesn’t play much but cute. happy to be here. country boy. canadian. in love with frankie.
tim schaller. best for last. the GOAT. timmy heads. amazing new hampshire guy. living that 603 life. i dig it. he said hi to me on camera once. god bless him and his brother.
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