Chapter 9: I hate it When You Make Me Laugh, Even Worse When You Make Me Cry
“I burn. I pine. I perish.”
-William Shakespeare, “The Taming of the Shrew”
What she couldn’t put together, Jason did the best he could to fill in the blanks.
He had been good, so good. Fooling her, making a deal with Reggie for what? Petty Cash? Bragging rights? Street Cred?
Her mind raged against the idea in the beginning but as they rode silently to her house she became more and more sure that if she peeled back the skin of Forsythe Pendleton Jones the III there would only be snake scales and ice cold blood.
She had given part of herself to him.
It made her sick, that he had known all of the right things to say. Just how to make her care for him.
She sat stoically in the passenger seat of Jason’s ridiculously beautiful car. If she wasn’t having an emotional crisis she was sure that she would have appreciated it much more than she was at the moment.
Jason didn’t press her for conversation, not when she yelled at him in the empty classroom, or when she demanded that he drive her home immediately, never mind her cheerleading practice and her long forgotten essay.
She had only asked brief, clipped questions about what he had known.
“Tell me, tell me right now.” Her voice had cracked as she clenched the sides of her chair. Her body had gone, cold.
Swallowing she looked at him, pleading. He only spoke quietly.
“From what I was able to figure out it all started in October….”
She stared at the wall behind him as he spoke.
Reggie had been a loudmouth, starting late November you would have been hard pressed to find a guy in the locker room who didn’t know about the deal he had made with Jughead Jones to get into Polly Cooper’s pants.
Of course there were certain people who simply couldn’t be on the inside, Jason for one, and Archie by extension. It was clever, Betty had to admit, keeping it so out there, but so hush hush at the same time. So that everyone knew, but nobody would tell. Quite the feat for someone with the intelligence level of Reggie Mantle.
“How did you find out then?” She kept her voice level, still not looking directly at him.
“I didn’t even suspect anything until my party, well Cheryl’s party.” He inhaled, “I don’t trust Reggie at the best of times, but when it came to Polly it was personal…”
She smiled grimly, “Still holding a candle? Is that why you told me?” Standing she crossed her arms. “Did you only tell me so you could win Polly back?”
His expression turned somber, and clouded with what Betty immediately identified as guilt. She turned on her heel to leave, but felt a firm, but gentle grip on her arm.
“Betty please, no that’s not the reason.”
She raised an eyebrow, feeling moisture begin to pool in the corner of her eyes.
He backtracked, “I- Well yeah that was part of it but I swear I didn’t but it all together until the dance. I hadn’t been able to piece it all together, you, Jughead, Polly, Reggie… I just couldn’t make it fit until I heard Jughead and Reggie arguing at the dance.”
She nodded for him to continue.
“I couldn’t quite make it all out but it sounded like Jughead wanted out of the deal, whatever it was, and Reggie was not taking it well. Now I realize why, Polly was his goal, his endgame. He didn’t care who got hurt in the process.”
The thought of the “deal” made Betty’s mouth dry. But why had Reggie picked the person everyone knew she hated the most to be the one to deceive her?
Because he is a snake, and snakes will always find a way to adapt and survive.
The thought squirmed in her mind like black tar, slowly covering all of the good memories of herself with him. Tainted. Destroyed.
A light buzz sounded from her backpack and she looked to see Kevin’s name on the caller ID.
Instead of answering it she only stared at the blank screen. A revelation brewing in her mind.
Her life was on that phone. Her favorite songs. Movies she loved. Text messages to Veronica and Archie.
It had gone missing and she wanted to slap herself.
Jughead had looked through her phone, picked apart her life. Finding her weaknesses, places to drip his poison and manipulate her into thinking he was a semi-decent human being.
More than decent, only a few short hours ago if you had asked her she would have said that she loved Jughead.
All of the secret conversations with Reggie, her phone disappearing, her bra going missing.
How had it taken her so long to see the sick manipulation that was taking place, it was ridiculous, almost comical.
She had nearly given him her virginity.
At that a dark laugh rang out. Almost a bark, causing Jason to make a startled jump.
She had been bitten by the most poisonous snake of all. Love.
She wanted to be cold, uncaring, the strong woman who walked out of this with dark eyeliner, and leather thigh high boots. Unashamed and matter of fact about it all.
It felt like she had been punched in the gut, or her chest was being clawed open by someone with Cheryl’s long vermillion nails.
Wrapping her arms around herself she slid slowly to the floor, as Jason rushed forward to grip her arms.
He looked frantic, as high school boys usually do in the presence of a crying female.
But Betty had to give him credit, he didn’t back off. Not as she let silent tears fall down her cheeks, and not when she half heartedly beat her fists on his chest letting out crazed sobs and nonsensical words.
She wasn’t what you would call a pretty crier.
He only patted her back, and offered her the sleeve of his letterman.
Now they sat silently in her driveway as she contemplated her next move.
“Polly should be home soon”, her throat was raw, and her cheeks hurt from rubbing away salty tears.
He only nodded and asked if she wanted to go in and clean up.
His kindness was not something she would forget, nor take for granted. Polly had done good with him, despite his family.
Betty could see that he was a good boy, and she knew that one day he could be a good Man for her sister.
She took each step to her room slowly. Her mind flashing back to every intimate kiss, lingering touch, and heated eye contact they had shared. She felt the whisper of his hands at her bra clasp, the ghost of his lips on her collar bone.
Each vision was marred, laid out for someone else’s viewing pleasure.
Had it been fun for him to knock her down a peg? To make her feel things for him so he could cruelly rip it all away. Pull the rug from beneath her feet and sneer as she fell in a heap on the floor.
Hot tears flowed anew down her face as she slowly peeled off her clothes. She blindly started a shower and let it slowly heat up.
Staring at her reflection she look in wonder,
He’d made her feel bare. Like it didn’t matter that she was the girl next door or the stereotypical good girl. She hated what he’d done to her since he barreled into her life, hated how he made her laugh at his movie commentary or how she giggled every single times their noses accidentally bumped while they sat intertwined in the backseat of her car.
The only thing she despised more was that he had enough power over her to draw out more tears than she has ever shed for someone else.
Jughead Jones had made her cry.
Standing in the shower she pondered that fact. She never wept over Archie, sure a few stray tears were shed but she didn’t get puffy eyed, and drippy nosed over him.
Wrapping her arms around herself she stood until all of the hot water had run out and the last of her tears had safely vanished down the drain.
When she emerged she was shocked to see Polly sitting on the couch with Jason, well shocked to see them seated so closely to one another.
Her voice swallowed the room before they had the time to jump apart.
They sat in silence, while acid still brewed in Betty’s gut, tainted memories rotted in her mind.
She let herself hash out every insignificant detail, every missed sign, the moments they had together that were never truly private.
They would not be the same, never again.
Surely they had been having a good laugh of it for months.
Still seated in the plush leather seats of Jason’s car she peered into the warm bubble of Pop’s diner, pondering the total hurricane that was about to unleashed within, disturbing the peace of the student body present.
Of course Reggie and his crew had already claimed a booth near to the front door. Raucous with laughter they beat their hands on the table and blew straw wrappers at one another, while sipping on an assortment of milkshakes and munching on heaping plates of French fries.
It should have worried her, at least brought a bubble of anxiety in her knotted stomach.
No, tonight she felt herself slip into something else entirely. She felt liberated, but not in a way that meant freedom for her, no.
In a way that made her feel as if nothing good or wholesome would ever tether her down again. No love, no words of hope or affirmation would bring her back to herself, not until she completed what she had come here to do.
Her sister and Jason only looked at her from their front seats in concern. Honestly she didn’t blame them one bit.
She was not entirely sure what she was going to do either.
But it didn’t scare her, no, it just made her feel cold. She only stared unfocused out of the window.
Rain had begun to fall, slowly turning into sleet from the freezing weather. It just occurred to her that her jacket still lay on the floor next to her bed. She only had on a thin long sleeve shirt, but she still didn’t feel the chill. The heater up front did not touch her and even if it had, she wasn’t sure she would be able to feel it.
Veronica looked radiant, chatting with Kevin who sat up on the back rest of their booth.
A picture perfect moment in time.
The sight of bright red hair peering across a table at a charcoal gray beanie snapped her into motion. She whipped out of the car. Her seatbelt had clanging against the door as she failed to slam it shut. Polly and Jason jostled after her, frantically shutting off the engine and unbuckling their seatbelts.
They weren’t fast enough.
Honestly it felt like she floated to their little booth, near the back corner of the shoppe.
Good, she wanted to catch him by surprise.
But oh god she must have looked like hell because as soon as she was within a few feet of the red booth seats they occupied Veronica’s eyes only widened and her usual warm complexion paled a few shades.
Betty’s knew she had mascara under her eyes. She felt the damp sleeves of her thin pink shirt against her wrists. Her thin pants clung to her legs barely covering the tops of her moccasin slip on shoes. Blonde hair framed her face, tangled and creased from the ponytail it had been in for the past day.
Veronica slapped Archie’s arm, hard enough to get his immediate attention. At the sight of her his eyebrows pulled together. Concern and anger crossing his face. Betty knew that he would want to hurt whatever jerk had made her look this way.
The irony was not lost on her.
It was the final head that turned that wracked her to the core, made her want to claw out her heart so that she would never have to feel whatever this was again. If she could she would have left it at the door step of his beat up trailer.
It wasn’t as if there was much left of it anyway, and after this confrontation she was not too sure there would be any heart left in Elizabeth Cooper.
Just the way Jughead Jones intended from the beginning.
A smile fell off of his face, the remnant of a joke recently told or a quip only just exchanged with his best friend. At least with Archie she knew it wasn’t at her own expense.
Words bubbled on his lips but before he would call them forth his head was flung to the side with a sharp crack.
For a brief moment Betty thought she had done it. But her hands still lay at her sides, limp, too weak to even curl up into even a small fist.
No it was her sister, Polly Cooper who stood lightly shaking her hand out. Honestly despite the obvious pain she was in Betty thought she might hit him again as he sat there with his right hand gingerly covering his eye.
When she spoke she spat, venom and rage slipping into her voice.
“That was for my sister you asshole.”
He only looked at her in confusion before turning his dark gaze to Betty.
Behind her Jason carefully inspected Polly’s hand before calling out to Pop for an ice pack.
As he guided her to the diner countertop she looked like she was still ready to go ten rounds with Reggie who had propped his feet up into the booth opposite of his body, popping french fries lazily into his mouth. It seemed he was done with whatever infatuation he had with Polly Cooper.
This was far more interesting.
The diner was quiet enough that she could hear the light tapping of their shoes as they slowly walked away. Polly only shot her a look, one that was meant to give her courage.
She felt tired. Like she could lay in one of the booths and fall asleep unconcerned about the scene currently unfolding. At the same time she wanted to wake up, kicking, screaming, and clawing her way through.
The dark haired boy only stood up from the booth, reaching for her arm, cautiously like he was approaching an injured animal.
She barely felt a small course of pleasure at the hurt look on his face as she took the smallest step back from his form.
“What the hell Betts, are you ok?”
Blonde strands had fallen in her face, and she wished she could have hidden her entire self behind the thin curtain. The heated stares of the diner patrons bore into her back, into her head, and into her heart.
Reggie Mantle sat three booths down from her, his voice a constant buzzing that she couldn’t get out of her head. She wasn’t proud of it but when his lips pulled over his teeth into a conspiratorial smile and his eyes turned to her with malice in them she snapped.
Her voice rang out clear and loud out into the quiet establishment. Everyone had waited with bated breathe to see why this disheveled Cooper girl was making such a scene.
She turned on her heel away from the beanie clad boy and strode toward Reggies table.
“Well did you win Reggie?”
He feigned confusion as he cocked his head to the side, eyebrows lightly pulling together, lips pursed.
“Oh you know, the little high stakes bet you had with Jones, so that you could manipulate Polly and I?” She took in deep breathes, “The one where you promised him money if he took me to the out, kissed me, and god knows what else.”
He opened his mouth to add something she assumed was intended to be clever, but she only steam rolled on.
“Oh yeah what were the terms? If he took me to the formal or was it Prom? I am a little fuzzy on the details here.” An empty laugh escaped her lips. She hated the cruelty in it.
Blonde hair swished as she snapped her head over her shoulder at Jughead, who stood with his hands still outstretched for her.
She looked him up and down.
“Maybe you could shed some light on this.” She hated that she couldn’t keep a slight crack out of her voice.
The black shirt he wore clung to his torso, his leather jacket had been previously discarded at the end of the booth where she normally would have sat.
A bruise was starting to form on his eye, but that didn’t seem to be what was causing him pain. Well, agony judging by his face.
“Betty…” his voice broke and trailed off. His eyes had turned red as he stood there, with what she hoped was the same vulnerability that she felt.
A tear dripped from her jaw onto the floor. She hadn’t realized tears had started crawling then flowing down her face, hot and angry.
She had done so good. The strong woman in her patted her back, and whispered words of affirmation to her. But the scared girl, the one that she felt clawing back forced her to make a decision.
Jason’s car revved to life once more outside the door and she let herself be calmed by the reliable purr of the engine
“I hope you buy something really nice you cold hearted bastard.”
The words had the effect she intended as she saw him crumble in on himself.
She nearly broke into a run as she hauled herself out of the too hot diner to the frigid air outside.
The locks snapped into place on the door as she saw the door of Pop’s fling open nearly slamming into the wall behind it.
His fists banged against the window, his voice desperate as the car began to pull slowly away. She couldn’t make out what he said. She could only lay her head in the middle seat, curling into a small ball.
His nostrils flared and his eyes were wild as he pounded. The gray beanie that usually covered his head had fallen off, surely into a puddle.
The thought made her sad.
Black hair fell forward into his eyes as he pleaded with her. Polly turned back, offering her hand. Betty squeezed it gently and look out at the boy that had hurt her for a moment longer.
He leaned his forehead so that it touched the glass, and his breath fogged the window as he panted.
But it didn’t ache in her heart didn’t subside, mountains didn’t move, and there was no earth shattering revelation.
No she just sat there numb, but somehow still in agonizing pain.
She would never forget the desperate look on his damp face as she looked up at him.
Hello loves, thanks for reading and reviewing and giving kudos. I don’t know what I would do without all of you. You truly keep me going and I cannot thank you enough.
I would also like to mention that at some point I will be going back through the chapters, cleaning up, editing, and re-checking for mistakes. Just as soon as I have a life again :)
Until then please enjoy another chapter and as always let me know what you think.
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