⎾↣⏌ he allows a break in expression if only to roll his eyes,
the woman’s — girl’s, for she is barely older than he even if her
list of kills is greater than his own — words finding some ember of
amused irritation within the spark that it is chest. she’s a victor,
which means that she has her share of rumours. he’s sure his
own have already begun to spread, leaking through the capitol
streets like blood from a wound— he will have a lover in all 12
districts by morn, he is sure, & 12 more in the capitol. the very
idea repulses him in more ways than he can put word to, for
these are the people who watched him KILL, who watched it
destroy him from the inside out, who watched him snap an ally’s
— a friend’s — neck. & now they truss him up, parade him about,
fawn at his feet. it makes him want to vomit— sometimes, he can
feel the bile at the back of his throat, though he isn’t sure if it’s
from [ disgust ] or anger. ( & there is the dread spun by snow’s
request of his presence before he can go home — is this normal?
why must he spend additional time with the one man he would
not regret kiling? )